...was lying on bed reflecting on the past few year. What have i been doing? I don’t put in any effort into blogging as much as before. That’s because bad things kept happened to me. I couldn’t helped it but to feel very emotional over it. You know the feeling whereby you pour all your feeling, time, effort and energy onto something and it didn’t work out the way you expected it to be? Losing interest in everything I do, everything seemed so dull. I just feel lost…like what am I doing with my life. There’s a point where it gone so bad that I started to have trust issues, it’s getting so hard to actually trust somebody anymore. Also, I neglected my blog… It’s all because of my 3 years plus…the worst, longest and failure relationships. This guy named Mr. A was probably the worst guy I have ever met in my life, he abused, threatened, spent my money, manipulated and cheated on me. But I’m glad that I opened up my eyes and everything appears clear to me now. Now I finally snapped out of all these fucking lies I’ve told myself, all these torturous things I’ve tied myself down with. AFTER I BROKE UP WITH HIM, ANONYMOUS CALLED ME A GOLD DIGGER. Life has not been fair to me, what shit do you guys know? Without knowing what I’ve gone through for the past few years, why on earth was I labeled as the “Gold Digger”. Never once in my life I ask my boyfriend to buy me stuffs that i wanted. I worked hard to earn money and buy things that I love by myself. I grew up in a family, whereby my Mom taught me how to be independent and not to rely on people. If I don’t have money, either I don’t buy it or I work hard for it myself. So how is this fair to me to be called as a “Gold Digger” while he was the one spending my money? When we started dating, i was 18 years old and he was 19 years old, a poly student with money given by his Mom. And back then my Mom cut off my allowance and so to survive in this society, I worked at my friend’s pub. Drink, Drank, Drunk almost everyday... to be continued
here!