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Matters of the Heart. Has a Commercial Fuck turned into a torrid Love Affair which has turned your life upside down? Fear not. We have experts here who can help you through your roller coaster ride. Tell us your story and we'll do our best to help.

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  #1  
Old 06-02-2009, 11:49 PM
rtcb68 rtcb68 is offline
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Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

Got to know this China girl and have a very good time with her for a while.
We call each other every day thought she is in China and my feeling grow alone the way. I had told her that I am married but she really dont mind and had lie to her family that i am not. I really wish to married her but i am married.
Can anyone assist me? Can I married her in China thought i had registered in Singapore? We do love each other very very much.
  #2  
Old 06-02-2009, 11:58 PM
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Re: Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

bro, make up your mind who u want.

Singapore wife or china wife.

But don't forget, mistress is always more exciting....
  #3  
Old 07-02-2009, 12:01 AM
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Re: Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

Quote:
Originally Posted by rtcb68 View Post
Got to know this China girl and have a very good time with her for a while.
We call each other every day thought she is in China and my feeling grow alone the way. I had told her that I am married but she really dont mind and had lie to her family that i am not. I really wish to married her but i am married.
Can anyone assist me? Can I married her in China thought i had registered in Singapore? We do love each other very very much.
Hi bro,
Not to make it too simple, just get a divorce. and go married the china girl.
If you fool around behind your wifes back she will get back at you legally, which will cost you more.

My humble two cents.
  #4  
Old 07-02-2009, 12:15 AM
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TanChinKu TanChinKu is offline
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Re: Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

Sigh... it is because greedy guys like you that cause me to be left on the shelf
  #5  
Old 07-02-2009, 12:18 AM
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Re: Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

its lust or love?? don't kena KC trap...
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  #6  
Old 07-02-2009, 12:20 AM
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Re: Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

Not sure whether I'm right.U r wrong when u r married once (lost ur freedom).U r really wrong when u wanna get married again (lost ur assets).U r so damn wrong when u wanna get married again when u r still married (lost urself).Jus blamed urself coz u r borned Singaporean-All the above are grave mistakes here
  #7  
Old 07-02-2009, 12:21 AM
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TanChinKu TanChinKu is offline
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Re: Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

If it is love... so what happened when you first married your wife? Wasn't it because of love? Didn't you think that you were so in love during that time too? SO this new found is really love this time? The previous one weren't? Would it be the case that the current new found love will end up like the 1st in the future?
  #8  
Old 07-02-2009, 12:25 AM
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Re: Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

Well bro Rtcb68, Just ask yourself how many yr are u with ur wife? Are u happy with her for all those year? if the ans it yes..... then forget about your that china girl..... if the ans it no then ask yourelf again.... if you with your this wife dirvoce and get marry this china girl after a few year, the Q will be back to you again.... if u get to know another china girl how? how will you do?

you get the pic? you get what i mean?
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  #9  
Old 07-02-2009, 12:32 AM
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Re: Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

Dear TS, before everything starts, cool it off. SBF don't require another SG guy cheated by PRC gal story. Do read past threads for more info. So far the score is PRC 1,000,000 SG 0.
  #10  
Old 07-02-2009, 12:41 AM
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Re: Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

Think you are real confused..

U dun love yr wife anymore?
  #11  
Old 07-02-2009, 12:43 AM
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Re: Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

Dear TS, it's time to wake your BIG HEAD to do some thinking work. Don't always rely on your SMALLER HEAD to do the thinking!!!
  #12  
Old 07-02-2009, 01:01 AM
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Re: Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

dear TS, i cant advise much as tis is ur life, no matter how much advise me and other samster here give u, in the end u still have to make the decision urself, all i can help here is to show u a post that i saw in other forum and so i copy and paste here for u to take a look, hope it help u wat to do.

" On my wedding day, I carried my wife in my arms. The bridal car stopped
in front of our one-room flat. My buddies insisted that I carry her out of the car in my arms. So I carried her into our home. She was then
plump and shy. I was a strong and happy bridegroom.

This was the scene of ten years ago.

The following days were as simple as a cup of pure water: we had a kid,
I went into business and tried to make more money. When the assets were steadily increasing, the affections between us seemed to ebb. She was a civil servant. Every morning we left home together and got home almost at the same time. Our kid was studying in a boarding school.

Our marriage life seemed to be enviably happy. But the calm life was
more likely to be affected by unpredictable changes.

Dew came into my life.

It was a sunny day. I stood on a spacious balcony. Dew hugged me from
behind. My heart once again was immersed in her stream of love. This was the apartment I bought for her.

Dew said, You are the kind of man who best draws girls eyeballs. Her
words suddenly reminded me of my wife. When we just married, my wife
said, Men like you, once successful, will be very attractive to girls.
Thinking of this, I became somewhat hesitant. I knew I had betrayed my
wife. But I couldn t help doing so.

I moved Dew s hands aside and said, You go to select some furniture,
O.K.? I ve got something to do in the company. Obviously she was
unhappy, because I had promised her to go and see with her. At the
moment, the idea of divorce became clearer in my mind although it used
to be something impossible to me.

However, I found it rather difficult to tell my wife about it. No matter
how mildly I mentioned it to her, she would be deeply hurt. Honestly,
she was a good wife. Every evening she was busy preparing dinner. I was
sitting together. Or, I was lounging before the computer, visualizing Dew's
body. This was the means of my entertainment.

One day I said to her in a slight joking way, suppose we divorce, what
will you do? She stared at me for a few seconds without a word.
Apparently she believed that divorce was something too far away from
her. I couldn t imagine how she would react once she got to know I was
serious.

When my wife went to my office, Dew had just stepped out. Almost all the
staff looked at my wife with a sympathetic eye and tried to hide
something while talking with her. She seemed to have got some hint. She
gently smiled at my subordinates. But I read some hurt in her eyes.

Once again, Dew said to me, He Ning, divorce her, O.K.? Then we live
together. I nodded. I knew I could not hesitate any more.

When my wife served the last dish, I held her hand. I ve got something
to tell you, I said.

She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.
Suddenly I didn t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know
what I was thinking. I want to divorce. I raised a serious topic calmly.

She didn t seem to be much annoyed by my words, instead she asked me
softly, why? . I m serious. I avoided her question. This so-called
answer turned her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man!

At that night, we didn t talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she
wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly
give her a satisfactory answer, because my heart had gone to Dew.

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated
that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She
glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. I felt a pain in my heart.
The woman who had been living ten years with me would become a stranger
one day. But I could not take back what I had said.

Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected
to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of
divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and
clearer.

A late night, I came back home after entertaining my clients. I saw her
writing something at the table. I fell asleep fast. When I woke up, I
found she was still there. I turned over and was asleep again.

She brought up her divorce conditions: she didn t want anything from me,
but I was supposed to give her one month s time before divorce, and in
the month s time we must live as normal life as possible. Her reason was
simple: our son would finish his summer vacation a month later and she
didn t want him to see our marriage was broken.

She passed me the agreement she drafted, and then asked me, He Ning, do you still remember how I entered our bridal room on the wedding day?
This question suddenly brought back all those wonderful memories to me.
I nodded and said, I remember . You carried me in your arms , she
continued, so, I have a requirement, that is, you carry me out in your
arms on the day when we divorce. From now to the end of this month, you must carry me out from the bedroom to the door every morning.

I accepted with a smile. I knew she missed those sweet days and wished
to end her marriage with a romantic form.

I told Dew about my wife s divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and
thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she does, she has to face
the result of divorce, she said scornfully. Her words more or less made
me feel uncomfortable.

My wife and I hadn t had any body contact since my divorce intention was
explicitly expressed. We even treated each other as a stranger. So when I carried her out for the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son
clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly, Let us start from today, don t tell our son. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for bus, I drove to office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my
chest. We were so close that I could smell the fragrance of her blouse.
I realized that I hadn t looked at this intimate woman carefully for a
long time. I found she was not young any more. There were some fine
wrinkles on her face.

On the third day, she whispered to me, The outside garden is being
demolished. Be careful when you pass there.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I seemed to feel that we were
still an intimate couple and I was holding my sweetheart in my arms. The
visualization of Dew became vaguer.

On the fifth and sixth day, she kept reminding me something, such as,
where she put the ironed shirts, I should be careful while cooking, etc.
I nodded. The sense of intimacy was even stronger.

I didn t tell Dew about this.

I felt it was easier to carry her. Perhaps the everyday workout made me
stronger. I said to her, It seems not difficult to carry you now.

She was picking her dresses. I was waiting to carry her out. She tried
quite a few but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, All my
dresses have grown fatter. I smiled. But I suddenly realized that it was
because she was thinner that I could carry her more easily, not because
I was stronger. I knew she had buried all the bitterness in her heart.
Again, I felt a sense of pain. Subconsciously I reached out a hand to
touch her head.

Our son came in at the moment. Dad, it s time to carry mum out. He said.
To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had been an essential
part of his life. She gestured our son to come closer and hugged him
tightly. I turned my face because I was afraid I would change my mind at
the last minute. I held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom,
through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck
softly and naturally. I held her body tightly, as if we came back to our
wedding day. But her much lighter weight made me sad.

On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step.
Our son had gone to school. She said, Actually I hope you will hold me
in your arms until we are old.

I held her tightly and said, Both you and I didn t notice that our life
was lack of such intimacy.

I jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid
any delay would make me change my decision. I walked upstairs. Dew
opened the door. I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I won t divorce. I m
serious.

She looked at me, astonished. The she touched my forehead. You got no
fever. She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I can
only say sorry to you, I won t divorce. My marriage life was boring
probably because she and I didn t value the details of life, not because
we didn t love each other any more. Now I understand that since I
carried her into the home, she gave birth to our child, I am supposed to
hold her until I am old. So I have to say sorry to you.

Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed
the door and burst into cry. I walked downstairs and drove to the
office.

When I passed the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet for my
wife which was her favorite. The salesgirl asked me to write the
greeting words on the card. I smiled and wrote, I ll carry you out every
morning until we are old. "
  #13  
Old 07-02-2009, 01:38 AM
Wet_Towel Wet_Towel is offline
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Re: Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

Quote:
Originally Posted by DNAdevil View Post
dear TS, i cant advise much as tis is ur life, no matter how much advise me and other samster here give u, in the end u still have to make the decision urself, all i can help here is to show u a post that i saw in other forum and so i copy and paste here for u to take a look, hope it help u wat to do.

.................................................. .................................................. ...
.................................................. .................................................. ...

When I passed the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet for my
wife which was her favorite. The salesgirl asked me to write the
greeting words on the card. I smiled and wrote, I ll carry you out every
morning until we are old. "

TS, you up leh. Post such a long story. More then 10000 words leh. But touching, me also almost divorce my OC before. Not because of someone else but mainly money. Think of it now, coming close to 10 years of married life..
  #14  
Old 07-02-2009, 03:28 AM
Bookshelf Bookshelf is offline
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Re: Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

Do u still love yr wife?
  #15  
Old 07-02-2009, 03:29 AM
Wtapss Wtapss is offline
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Re: Wanted to married a China girl but i am married

Originally Posted by DNAdevil
dear TS, i cant advise much as tis is ur life, no matter how much advise me and other samster here give u, in the end u still have to make the decision urself, all i can help here is to show u a post that i saw in other forum and so i copy and paste here for u to take a look, hope it help u wat to do.

.................................................. .................................................. ...
.................................................. .................................................. ...

When I passed the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet for my
wife which was her favorite. The salesgirl asked me to write the
greeting words on the card. I smiled and wrote, I ll carry you out every
morning until we are old. "



It's such a touching story.
TS , please think twice before you make any decision.
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