The Truth About Condoms: My Story - by Susan Stafford (ex-prostitute)

[solidrock]

I found this on the Internet. Happy reading, people.

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The Truth About Condoms : My Story
by Susan Stafford (ex-prostitute)

When I was a prostitute, I was the type that always used condoms religiously. This was because I had lost my first born son to adoption. At the time, I wanted more than anything to be able to have children again and I was determined to not let any STD prevent me from doing that. So I had remembered what my step-father and the madam of the escort agency always told me, "You can't contract anything as long as you condoms." That motto became my surefire for the next seven years while I remained in the escort industry.

One of the very first things that happened to me was that I caught crabs (Pediculosis pubis or pubic lice).

I thought those critters were awful to deal with and they had no mercy. I couldn't work until I had gotten rid of them completely, and they itched – bad! But I still tried to remain positive and thought, "no big deal". Boy, was I wrong. Time went on and I continued to use condoms.

The second thing I contracted was Chlamydia.

Chlamydia is a sexually transmitted disease that has the potential to cause infertility. I had no symptoms and I had no idea how long I carried it, or how many other men I had given it to. Luckily, I went in for a routine check-up and my doctor had caught it. This STD hit me a lot harder emotionally then the experience with crabs, because I wanted more than anything to have another child and all I could think about was how fertile I would be for when that time came. My first thought was, "guess this is God's way of punishing me for me for being a prostitute." But God had other plans.

More time went on and I continued to use condoms.

Fast foward to the year 1990, I was then arrested and kept one client on the side that I saw three times. The last time I exchanged money for sex was in 1991. I got tested several times for every kind of STD possible, because I felt that because I was out of the escort industry, it was time to start with a clean slate. That was also the year that I met my husband, Steve (Steve and I met through a friend). Right prior to meeting him, I was given the clean bill of health. I was estatic that God had given me a new start at life and I felt incredibily blessed. Steve and I have now been married almost 14 years.

Okay, so.. this is the happy ending, right? Wrong. Read on.

14 years later….

Fast forward to the end of 2006. Our kids are much older now (13, 9 and 5) and as far as I was concerned, worrying about STD's was a thing of the past. It all started when I went to see my regular MD for routine check-up and I had complained of hair loss. I don't know what made him think to check me for STD's, but he did. He did not tell me that he was doing that, which is a good thing because I would have been apt to tell him that he was crazy after me being in a monogamous relationship for 14 years.

On my next follow up visit I received bad news. "You tested positive for Hepatitis C."

My heart sunk. Hearing that was like telling me I had AIDS, and I was treated as if I had already had it.

"What? That's not possible!" I exclaimed. "I've been out of the sex industry for a long time. I was tested several times for several years after I left. I have had three children since then. Surely it would have been caught."

"It's possible. I'm sorry, but you are going to have to give more blood work."

He put the fear of God in me.

"There is also a strong possibility that you may have AIDS. Many people who have hepatitis C have AIDS."

"How could this have happened?" I silently asked.

"Did you ever use needles?"

"No."

"Have a blood transfusion?"

"No."

"Have you ever had a tattoo?"

"No."

"Well, it's mostly caught by blood to blood, but I feel you most likely would have caught it from your days in the sex industry."

I was stunned and I wanted to remain frozen in my chair. A million thoughts went through my head, faster than I could process the information. How could this have happened while I was in the escort service? I was so careful about using condoms correctly. I wanted a family more than anything. Steve and I had been together for fourteen years and had been in a monogamous relationship, so I knew all too well where I must have caught it: from the escort industry.

What did this mean? For me? For Steve and my children? My Gosh, I thought. I breastfed for over two years, and there was blood in my breast milk. Spencer hates needles! What would this mean for my ministry? I just got done telling my audience at the prostitution conference that I was disease free. I received a round of applause. How could I possibly continue my ministry?

I was escorted down the hall to give three vials of blood. I was told that the second set of blood work would tell me whether I just had the antibodies or actually had Hepatitis C. By the way the staff was treating me, however, I felt like my infection was already confirmed. Counting the next three, this made eight vials I had given in a period of two weeks. I noticed that the nurse put on extra thick gloves.

Right before the nurse injected the needle, I felt myself swallow as the reality hit. I thought my life would never be the same again.

My two week wait was a nightmare for me. Every minute of every day, I had wondered whether or not I was safe. Steve started getting paranoid about catching it, and I started to feel like an outcast in the family.

I started doing some of my own research about Hepatitis C and learned that Hepatitis C is usually not spread through sexual relations. However, according to the AIM Medical Healthcare Foundation, the efficacy of using latex condoms in preventing Hepatitis C is still unknown, and now I, like others, had become just another statistic. I wondered how many others, like me, faced the lies of the sex industry and the consequences of their decisions many years later.

The littlest things began to frighten me. For instance, when I would have my period, a sudden chill would come over me as I thought, Did I remember to wash the towel? Was there blood on the soap?

Then, one day, I caught Spencer using my tooth brush, and I rushed to him yelling, "Why are you doing that? Don't ever touch my tooth brush again! Never!" Spencer just stood there with a look of fear. I felt horrible, but my only goal was to protect him.

Later that night, I tucked my four-year-old son Spencer into bed and kneeled at his bedside. I softly ran my fingers through his dirty blond hair until he fell asleep. "Please, Lord, please… if nothing else," I whispered, "please let Spencer be okay. I deserve to have it, but he doesn't."

The sound of my prayer woke up Spencer. "Mom? Why are you crying?"

Holding my tears back, I replied, "Because you're so beautiful, and mommy loves you."

"Do you want my bear?" he asked.

"No, honey, you keep your bear. Mommy will be okay." I remained at his bedside until he fell asleep again.

I then went into my bedroom and prayed, crying in frustrated desperation, "Why, God? Why! Why now? Why after all these years? Why didn't this show up then? Tell me why, God? Haven't I done Your will? Isn't this ministry what You want? How do You expect me to run this ministry if I'm sick! Answer me! Why are You so quiet. Why, God? Why?"

I was as broken as a person could be. In the next moment, I realized that perhaps the reason the Hepatitis C was never caught was that God didn't want me to know at any other time in my life. Would I have been as strong? Probably not. Yet, at that moment, I wasn't sure that I could be strong any longer.
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[solidrock]

continued...

It seemed like an eternity before the test results were complete. I received a phone call before I drove down to the office. The nurse told me that they had accidentally sent my blood work to the lab unfrozen, causing it to be rejected. When asked if I would come back in to give another three vials, I said, "No. I'm finding another doctor."

Slamming the phone down, I told Steve, "I cannot believe they messed up like that! I cannot believe I have to wait yet another umpteen weeks!"

A month later, the second doctor confirmed that the first set of work showed that I was positive for Hepatitis C. He refused to do a second set of blood work. Instead, he referred me to a gastrology specialist. By the time Thanksgiving had come, I had endured almost six weeks of uncertainty as the gastrologist could not get me in for an appointment until the second week of December.

All my relatives were so happy to see each other. All I wanted to be was a bucket of tears. I had no inclination to be happy or shake anyone's hand. I saw no point in pretending.

When the day finally arrived for my second phase of testing at the gastrologist's office, the nurse put the fear of God in me. "If your second set confirms that you are active, realize what this means. You could need a liver biopsy and end up having to take shots three times per week." She then handed me a brochure that told me all about Interferon injections that, in my opinion, would make me sicker.

As I was escorted down the hall to give my blood, the lab nurse looked at me and asked, "Are you okay?" I told her I was fine, but the truth was I was far from fine. I had gone almost two months wondering if I was infected with Hepatitis C, I had been concerned for my future and for my husband and children. I had been treated like an outcast. I didn't even know if my ministry would flourish, and the nurse practitioner had just put the fear of God in me. How could I possibly be fine, lady? I had to wait another two weeks, and I didn't even feel like celebrating Christmas. I had started to wonder if it would be better not to know the results at all.

The Test Results….

On December 27th 2006, I finally got my chance to learn my results, over two months after I was first diagnosed. As I waited in a private room to learn the truth, I prayed, "God, you've brought me this far. Whatever happens, I promise You, Lord, that I will continue this ministry. I promise You, I will fight for Your men and women who You want to come home. I will educate the world about the dangers of the sex industry. Whatever Your will, I'm going to fight this fight. Everything I do with my ministry is for You."

The nurse came in and briefly introduced herself.

"Hi, I have the results. It shows HIV–negative, Hepatitis B-negative and Hepatitis A–negative."

"That's good, but what about the Hepatitis C?" I said with concern.

She fumbled through my records. "Hmm. It's not here. I'm not sure why. They should have been back by now. I'll have to call the lab."

When she left the room I became furious. I prayed again, "God? If she has lost the results then I've had it! No more, God! I don't care to find out the results. I'm through. Then it must be Your will that I don't know."

Twenty minutes felt like an hour. Upon her return, she walked in with a smile and said, "Congratulations! Your body fought the virus off. It appears you only had the antibodies. Less than twenty percent are that lucky. You are very, very lucky!"

Here I am, in March of 2007, and I don't feel that I was lucky. I was blessed. Today, I am free from crabs, Chlamydia, and (so far) am told that I am 100% disease free. This took WAY more than luck. I still have to have follow-up bloodwork 6 months from now for extra confirmation in the future, but even if it comes back with bad news, I will STILL fight for the TRUTH.

The truth about using an escort is horrifying. Before I began my journey in the escort industry, I was told several times by my "madam" and "stepfather" that as long as I used a condom, I would be safe. I was told that an escort was considered high class and that only those working the streets got diseases. Because I was sleeping with more upscale, professional men, I was supposed to be safe.

That was the biggest deception of all time.

During my journey, I had used condoms, and I still caught Chlamydia, Crabs and was exposed to Hepatitis C. Today those same lies within the escort industry still exist. Only now, the escorts themselves claim they get tested frequently so therefore you are safe. What they don't tell you however, is about the incubation period.

A friend of mine didn't even have symptoms of the HPV virus until two years and in the interim his wife contracted it from him.

I find it interesting that EVERY person who I have spoken with who has been involved with the adult entertainment industry, used condoms and ALL caught either Chlamydia, Herpes, HPV Hepatitis or AIDS.

I've heard the cries on the phone and gotten the emails. And you know what they all tell me? They all tell me that they wish they never did it to begin with because now it's too late.

This is the cold, harsh TRUTH.

Of course, women currently working in the escort industry aren't going to tell you this because they want your MONEY. YOU are their job. YOU are how they make their living and pay their bills and YOU alone are the one who will have to look at your wife when she's been bawling her eyes out over her new findings. And if you have children, YOU are the one that will have to face your children when they have to get stuck with a needle.

The TRUTH: there is no such thing as "safe sex."
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[solidrock]

continued...

According to Stephen Genuis, M.D., Condoms do not offer protection for diseases that are transmitted by skin to skin contact such as human papilloma virus and herpes simplex virus. No degree of condom education will curb the transmission of these organisms.

I never thought in a million years that anything would ever turn up positive, especially after I was tested many, many times after leaving the escort industry.

Are we really in control of our destinies? Will there ever be a day when we, as a society, will come to take God's word more seriously? Or will we continue to leave the instruction book on the shelf to collect dust? Our health is such a precious gift. While some may have considered my Hepatitis C experience nothing more than a minuet occurrence, I considered it a positive wake-up call. When do we draw the line people?

Here are some devastating truths written from Dr. Brian Clowes with Life Issues:

"As has been discussed, condoms do not offer protection for diseases that are transmitted by skin to skin contact such as human papilloma virus and herpes simplex virus, frequently found throughout the genital area in infected individuals. No degree of condom education will curb the transmission of these organisms."

--Stephen Genuis, M.D. "What About the Condom?" Risky Sex (2nd Edition). Edmonton, Alberta: KEG Publishing, 1991. "Condoms failed to prevent HIV transmission in three of 18 couples, suggesting that the rate of condom failure with HIV may be as high as 17%." --James J. Goedert, M.D. "What is Safe Sex?"

New England Journal of Medicine, October 21, 1987, page 1,340. "The condom was useless as a prophylactic against gonorrhea and even under ideal conditions against syphilis." --Nicholas J. Fiumara, M.D., Massachusetts Department of Public Health. "Effectiveness of Condoms in Preventing V.D."

New England Journal of Medicine, October 21, 1971, page 972. No matter how much 'safe(r) sex' education is taught, no matter how many bowls of free condoms are left in plain view, and no matter how much contraceptive marketing is propagated, there are a number of mechanical and human factors that simply cannot be controlled;

Condoms break and slip off;

They age. One study found that the breakage rate for condoms increased from 3.6% for new condoms to as high as 18.6% for condoms several years old. They deteriorate in even the best of conditions, but even more rapidly in extremely cold or hot situations. Condom wrappers recommend storing the product at temperatures between 59 and 88 degrees Fahrenheit. One researcher found that, at major condom distribution points in New Jersey and New York, boxes of condoms were left outdoors in the ice and snow during the dead of winter. During the summer months, the researcher took photographs of eggs frying on the floors of dozens of trucks and containers where condoms were stored in temperatures exceeding 180 degrees.

High temperatures cause oxidation and freezing temperatures cause crystallization in some of the chemical compounds that make up condoms, leading to cracking, drying, shrinking and drastic loss of flexibility and strength. Keep in mind that condoms exported from the United States sit in uninsulated shipping containers in extreme weather conditions for even longer periods of time; If taken out of the package and left unused for a long period of time, they are liable to ozone deterioration, which causes damage invisible to the eye; Improper use of oil-based lubricants can degrade them;

They get broken in their packages; They have allowed rates of manufacturing defects. The present acceptable quality limit (AQL) for North American condom manufacturers is 99.6% of condoms free of leaks. The British AQL is 97%, and the Dutch AQL is 96.5%; The users are caught up in passion and do not properly follow the ten- to sixteen-step process for safe usage; The users are compromised by the use of alcohol, marijuana, illegal drugs, prescription and over-the-counter drugs, or exhaustion; and bodily secretions can get around and over a condom even if it performs perfectly.

Let me explain this in simple terms: the FDA requires manufacturers to use a water test to examine samples from each batch of condoms for leakage. If the test detects a rate of more than 4% per 1,000, the entire lot is discarded.

If 4 leaking condoms are allowed in every batch of 1,000, there could be hundreds of thousands or even millions of leaking condoms circulating all over the world, either sold or distributed for free, and most probably contributing to the spread of HIV/AIDS or any other STD.

It happened to me!

According to AIM Healthcare Foundation, there have been just as many STD's with condom usage as without. For the client's spouses, for many, an STD is their reward. If using a prostitute was the healthy answer to our problems, we would all be healthy by now.

Trust me. I know.
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[naemlo]

If your story has 10 parts then u have to start 10 threads??? What is the different if your whole story is in 1 thread??

[solidrock]

Originally Posted by naemlo

If your story has 10 parts then u have to start 10 threads??? What is the different if your whole story is in 1 thread??

I'd have loved to consolidate it but the system limited me to 10000 characters.

So I had to circumcise the article with much regret.
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[sammyboyfor]

Originally Posted by solidrock

I'd have loved to consolidate it but the system limited me to 10000 characters.

So I had to circumcise the article with much regret.
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The limit of 10,000 characters does not prevent you from keeping all your posts in a single thread. There is no reason why you had to start a new thread for each part of the post.

I had the merge all the parts manually on your behalf. Please don't do that again.

I did a search and the material is published by some religious zealots. I wouldn't pay too much attention to the contents. The article sensationalises the dangers just as many articles pretend that safe sex is actually possible. As usual, the truth is somewhere in between. http://www.cbn.com/700club/features/...ord121106.aspx

[solidrock]

Originally Posted by sammyboyfor

I had the merge all the parts manually on your behalf. Please don't do that again.

Sorry and thanks.

I guess, in the wee hours of the morning, my brain goes into hibernating mode.
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[dnagene_gal]

This is something I always have to keep in mind.

[solidrock]

Originally Posted by dnagene_gal

This is something I always have to keep in mind.

You better!

[dnagene_gal]

Originally Posted by solidrock

You better!

Hahaha!! Why the big words huh??? Anyway I know what I do I have to be responsible and think of my future family. This story really have meaning.

[solidrock]

Originally Posted by dnagene_gal

Hahaha!! Why the big words huh??? Anyway I know what I do I have to be responsible and think of my future family. This story really have meaning.

Big + Red Words means my message is important, not IMPOTENT.

If you want to be responsible, then you better DON'T do.

[KLKOOL]

This story is just an extreme example. Like boss says... spread by religious extremists campaigning against prostitution and casual sex

[solidrock]

Originally Posted by KLKOOL

This story is just an extreme example. Like boss says... spread by religious extremists campaigning against prostitution and casual sex.

I'm more interested in the statistics since it is indifferent to the subjective bias of the individual or organisation.

[LifeWire]

Assuming what the article say is true then???

We cannot cheong already, because even with condom also cannot help.

Risk of been HIV positive is scaring the hell out of me!

[sammyboyfor]

Originally Posted by LifeWire

Risk of been HIV positive is scaring the hell out of me!

If you're scared, then stop fucking around then.