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#16
27-11-2007, 05:49 PM
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Re: Tricky Situation, How do you tacke this???
me currently can tink of 2 solns ...
1. ask ur 'future'-in-laws: r u selling ur daughter, ha? ... u dun want 2 buy a son-in-law, ah? ... 2. wait until ze gal is 40 yrs old ... by den, dey'll quickly gif u foc ... juz joking only hor ...  
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#17
27-11-2007, 06:12 PM
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Re: Tricky Situation, How do you tacke this???
Sounds very much like those parents in China! Marry my daughter, must be willing to foot the bill. I think this is Singapore, my friend, IF children want to marry, just give the blessing and let them do their own calculation on how they want to make their event memorable.
I think her parents like to make decision for her, a habit they never broke away after she grow up. Are they in some sort of financial difficulties or some objective practical reasons that they need to declare such things upfront? Or are they plain difficult with control-freak syndrome? You have to decide to live with them for the rest of your life man. If they like to dictate such arrangements, chances are this is just the tip of the bloody iceberg.
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#18
27-11-2007, 09:41 PM
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Re: Tricky Situation, How do you tacke this???
I guess you have to make your stand on this. If not, you sure be "eaten up" after marriage..
 let them know everything can be discussed but not what they say and that is final..i guess u have to also convince your gal to stand by your side too
__________________
"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy"
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#19
27-11-2007, 09:59 PM
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Re: Tricky Situation, How do you tacke this???
Maybe u have been with her together for too long already and marriage is like the next thing u need to do. Talk to her seriously and explain to her what is your current situation now. If 2 hands dun clap, no point going thru the next stage. Time to move go and get a better life b4 regret later.
__________________
New Target pts=1500 Prefer 10 pts and above for exchange Thks bros who have up my pts,will return favor day by day. Cheers! Do send me a reminder if I have miss on return favor. To up list Freeman96-need latest posting Handsomethe2nd
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#20
27-11-2007, 10:05 PM
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Re: Tricky Situation, How do you tacke this???
it would be best to discuss with ur GF. whether u like it or not, marrying her indirectly will merge her family into your circle.
if she is wiling to side you, she's a keeper. but if she starts nagging abt her parents wishes only...bro..time to f*** and bail out... 
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#21
27-11-2007, 10:36 PM
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Re: Tricky Situation, How do you tacke this???
You say they are tradditional right? Then by traddition they must provide their daughter with a dowry. Just make sure to remind them that if dowry is too small they will lose alot of face.
__________________
One Good Shot Deserves Another
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#22
27-11-2007, 10:38 PM
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Re: Tricky Situation, How do you tacke this???
from the way u calling ur gf a bitch, it sounded like she is already siding with her parents' demands and having arguments with you about it?
if ur gf is so insistant to follow the wishes of her parents even though she knows very well what is ur financial capabilities... and it cannot be resolved except that she will argue with u at every slightest chance without giving u a chance to talk it out. Then dump her. A marriage will not be able to work if one party does not try to put in effort to make things work... and if u have already fuck her and she using it as an excuse to say u cant dump her or she will call the police on you for rape accuse or something, just let her do it... not everytime a girl will win the case if you are really the innocent party. but seriously have a good talk with her first. If all else fail, do what you think is best for u to be able to be freed from such nonsense financial stress...
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#23
27-11-2007, 10:50 PM
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Re: Tricky Situation, How do you tacke this???
Quote:
if cannot, can any bro explain y? I don't see any difference leh .. mayb high class abit, call u by English name "ROBERT Terak" .... No purposely 1 2 suan u la, juz jokin, mai tu lan ok? my suggestion is still the standard one u will get from other aunt agony forum, talk to yr wife la, if she oso agree full heartedly (1/2 hearted still got hope) then can do the inevitable ba ...
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#24
28-11-2007, 01:30 AM
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Re: Tricky Situation, How do you tacke this???
still the same theory;
cannot beat them, join them. in your case; cannot change their mind, change gf.
__________________
樹高萬丈必有 根 水流千里必有 源
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#25
28-11-2007, 01:47 AM
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Re: Tricky Situation, How do you tacke this???
IMHO,
1) Use time dragging tactics (give excuse like still saving money for their demands) 2) Convert your gal mindset 3) Ignore their demands and expect a breakup 4) MIA 5) Find a new GF Anymore bros?
__________________
I up you up, everybody up up 2828 LuCkY NuMbeR Huat ahThanks to all the bros who support me. My latest fetish: Whatever...whenever... 己所之欲，先施于人
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#26
28-11-2007, 04:12 AM
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Re: Tricky Situation, How do you tacke this???
despite all the suggestions, i realised 1 question remains unasked.
What's the social/financial background of the girl's family, if they're from a well off family, then maybe it makes sense to demand for such things.. provided they include a hefty dowry.. if not, then chances are they're planning to rely on u in future (is tt's the only child they have), trust me, u don't want to be in those shoes... no pt spending your hard earned money on someone else's parents, not unless money comes easy or she's hellavu trophy wife... my advice, you don't seem to love her enough to spend tt kinda money or it's simply beyound u at this pt in life, so bail brother....
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#27
28-11-2007, 08:50 AM
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Re: Tricky Situation, How do you tacke this???
Quote:
Wedding table - $2K desposit...total bill for the night $14K...bill balance $12K...Ang bao collected (for abt 28 tables) : $14K. After paying dinner bill, still have $2K. Honey moon : both my frz & wife agreed for a cheap one first. Batam resort : $230 per pax. Total + misc = approx. $700 Photo + car : they scrapped off the photo taking, but asked a photographer friend to help. With their rental gown and suit, they travelled ard S'pore for beautiful spots. You dun get those stunning design effect photos which cost abt $5k per package, but what they have is an album full of fun memories. A group of frzs was kind enough to lent out their cars for the day. Fee : only ang baos of $18 x 2 cars + $188 x 2 drivers. Total spent : a dinner for the photographer frz $20 + $180 (photo printing fee) + car ang baos $412 + gowns rental $1000= $1612 Ring & Necklace : The groom parent was gracious enough to buy a standard 4 Dian Jing for their future daughter-in-law as a gift. And what are their wedding rings : each have a ring tattoo ard their fingers...to symbolise "eternal" love.  Total cost : $100 Ping Kim : Now the gf's parent work their part of wonders here. They only want 2 tables (cos gf's relatives are very small numbers, due to some very complicated issues). The best part is, they dun demand to keep these 2 tables ang bao. And when my frz gave a ping kim ang bao of $5K, they graciously rtn him back $3K. Total cost here : $2K Other misc : ang baos, "sisters" "brothers" group ang baos, buying of new stuff like the bed sheets etc.. Total : $3K In conclusion : Wedding table : +$2K honeymoon : - $700 Photo & car : - $1612 Rings : - $100 Ping kim : - $2K misc : - $3K Total : - $7412 In grand total : he only forked out approx. $6000 for his wedding affairs. Now, i know this may sound unrealistic to some here. I believe it takes a lot of understanding and support from both sides to restort to such terms. However, end of the day, i had seen them happy in their own ways. They are neither very rich nor very poor now, but i guess they are just contented to be sharing their life together, good or bad. Now every as and when, they will pampered themselves a little with a short trip to countries like HK, Taiwan, etc. I think this is one of the rare cases. Indeed a rare one for such time now. P. S - the various amts mentioned above are not of exact figures but on estimation basic.
__________________
人要自信，不要自大, 人要自爱，不要自恋, 人要自知，不要自欺 What's the difference between love, true love and showing off? Spitting, swallowing and gargling. My story thread Mediacock Drama , A Sinful Lust... Last edited by chickenzip; 28-11-2007 at 08:53 AM. Reason: Forget to add in gowns rental cost..heehee
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#29
28-11-2007, 09:31 AM
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Re: Tricky Situation, How do you tacke this???
Quote:
__________________
Walk on through the wind, Walk on through the rain, Tho' your dreams be tossed & blown. Walk on, walk on with hope in your heart, You'll never walk alone, You'll never, ever walk alone.
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#30
28-11-2007, 09:39 AM
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Re: Tricky Situation, How do you tacke this???
Quote:
Bargain for long time then eventually settle with 50k. Heng the gf help out alot secretly else realli mus rob bank. You can imagine how demanding the parent will be on other stuff... Heng last time my in-law are bery firm on rejecting any ping kim. There are oso instances whereby in-law insisted all angpao goes to them. Lidat no offset leow.... Haizz
__________________
桃花坞里桃花庵，桃花庵下桃花仙。桃花仙人种桃树，又摘桃花换酒钱。 酒醒只在花前坐，酒醉还来花下眠。半醉半醒日复日，花落花开年复年。 但愿老死花酒间，不愿鞠躬车马前。车尘马足显者事，酒盏花枝隐士缘。 若将显者比隐士，一在平地一在天。若将花酒比车马，彼何碌碌我何闲。 别人笑我太疯癫，我笑他人看不穿。不见五陵豪杰墓，无花无酒锄作田。
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