Husband that dont like Sex after giving birth

[Gandilf82]

it issnt a hint, its pretty obvious though. Now i am caught in a dilemma.

We guys find FB can fuck and forget, girls is different. they will feel for you so end up, i might be breaking other people's family.

[Gandilf82]

It issnt a hint. Rather its pretty obvious.
I am caught in a dilemma.
We guys can fuck and forget but the girl if likes you , they will feel for you.
I might end up breaking other people family. Her husband is a nice father but not a good lover.

Originally Posted by iswift

Ts, could it be a hint to u ?
Seldom gal will tell others (guys) that they are not sextify at home.
This could well be a start to a FB relationship... Juz try your luck and push a little further.

[water123]

Originally Posted by Gandilf82

it issnt a hint, its pretty obvious though. Now i am caught in a dilemma.

We guys find FB can fuck and forget, girls is different. they will feel for you so end up, i might be breaking other people's family.

She initiated. U can name yr terms, then fuck. Well she dont mind breaking up own family why u worry.

[iceage]

Originally Posted by Gandilf82

It issnt a hint. Rather its pretty obvious.
I am caught in a dilemma.
We guys can fuck and forget but the girl if likes you , they will feel for you.
I might end up breaking other people family. Her husband is a nice father but not a good lover.

If you cannot offer your help to her, I am sure many bros here would be glad to help.

[n00b_b0nker]

Originally Posted by iceage

If you cannot offer your help to her, I am sure many bros here would be glad to help.

i agree! in the end it's a matter of settling your needs one way or another.

[minihim]

Gandilf82 i could help you solve the problem.... just intro her to me... then your problem solve.....
I promise that i will in any way try to keep their relationship together

[yang punk]

Being her fb is actually helping her marriage. Satisfy her sexually so that she goes home feeling guilty and will therefore treat her husband better. But do keep reminding her your intention is NOT to break up her family as her child needs both a father and mother...that you are there just to provide her moral support until such time her hubby's attitude towards sex with her changes. Teach her to be more proactive in bed with her hubby...that will gain you more brownie's point!

[Bebeque]

From a reading of the replies, one or a combination of more than one of the issues could be the reason(s) for the husband losing interests after the wife's pregnancy:
a husband ate out during and after pregnancy and now find home cooked food too plain;
b husband himself felt neglected for the months during and after pregnancy;
c because of baby, wife not so attentive to husband vs babdy and husband responding to this;
d both are adjusting to new experiences of being parents and that added even more stresses in their relationship;
e Husband finds wife's cxxx too loose after childbirth and does not give the same sensation as before and thus lost interests after a few sessions;

Whatever the reason(s), it appears both are having a problem. It will likely to get worse if nothing gets done to find out and hopefully resolve the underlying issues.

If FT is a good friend and knows this is a problem for the couple, best is for her to persuade them to seek some professional help for the problem. Visits to the neighbourhood or nearby local Family Counselling Unit will be a good starting point. More professional help can be considered, depending on the situation.

Good luck.

[Gandilf82]

Thanks bebeque. The wife had suggested that before but due to the husband ego, he refuses to seek doctor"s help.

All fellow samsters. I am very appreciative of the valuable advice you guys gave.

Really thank you all

Sincerely
Gan

[Bebeque]

Originally Posted by Gandilf82

Thanks bebeque. The wife had suggested that before but due to the husband ego, he refuses to seek doctor"s help.

All fellow samsters. I am very appreciative of the valuable advice you guys gave.

Really thank you all

Sincerely
Gan

Many times, as the saying goes, the by stander observing is the one who knows best. The couple involved in the problem may be too engrossed in their issues to know what to do or the implications of the problem.

I cannot suggest that TS, as the couple's friend go in to intervene with the couple's issue as your mutual relationships and level of interactions are unknown.

What I can comment are as follows:

1 TS has said that the husband had refused to see a doctor which was suggested by the wife. Perhaps this medical approach was not the right one in the first place and thus was rejected by the husband, Very often, sexual problems between married couples do not arise out of medical or even physical problems. For example, the sexual problems are the manifestations of psychological or communication problems between couples. One or both partners expressed their unhappiness with the state of the relationship by holding back or reducing expressions of intimacy and love.

2 Communications between couples is always the starting point and the link between couples. Good communications between couples result in good marriages. Bad communications between couples will result in unhappy marriages. Good communications between couples will result in good marriage relationships. Good communications mean that each understand to a very big extend what each wants of each other, each other's expectations, limits, abilities, roles and each is able to effectively convey their needs/wants to each other with clear transmission/reception. Of course, good communications is not that easy to be established between couples - it takes a lifetime and much much efforts by both partners and both must be willing.

3 What can be suggested then is for the issue between the couple be approached from the point of view of strengthening their roles as parents and better marriage communications. Thus, activities such a marital relationships, talks, seminars, courses and even visits to family counselling units are good starting points.

4 If the couple can be persuaded to attend some of these parental, family, marriage events, (of course, the best in this case being family counselling), then their relationship hopefully will improve.

5 Once the relationship improves, then the sexual and intimacy issues will sort out by themselves. Whether the issues eventually are narrowed down to being medical related can then be verified. At the moment, it is still too early to suggest that a medical problem exists.

I am no professional counseller nor medically trained. What I can offer is only some basic points of view. TS, who presumably knows the couple best would be in position to assess what would be the best way to help the couple. Just don't give them up on them, if you are willing to help. If you are able to help them in some way, then this indeed would be a good merit for you (no offence of any kind intended).

Just best wishes to you and your couple friends. Hopefully, some things can be done and things will turn out better as time progresses.

Cheers.

[Gandilf82]

Your post bebeque is detailed and well said.
Will up you if I have the power.
Thanks!

[n30n]

Bebeque said it right.

It's about communications. And usually the root of the problem is Ego.
If his ego so high that he refuse to accept his wife words, then the communication is breaking down.

So in a way, asking for a marriage counselling aka see 'doc' is not about blaming the husband for the problems or airing dirty linen in public. He need to understand that.

He need to forget about his ego, face, other people's opinions and truly face the issue in the marriage with his wife. THe counsellor will be the guide to improve the communications between the couple.

If his goals is to improve the marriage, and not to protect reputation, protect dignity/ face etc, he should go all out for it with his wife.

[asdfghjkl]

maybe he has some fun outside? i read in another thread a guy dun touch his wife anymore after going for FL..

[analog]

Originally Posted by Gandilf82

Hi fellow people,

I have this friend who met this problem which i dont understand her husband even though i am a guy.

She complained that her husband dont like having sex or very tough to be aroused after they had a child.

It seemed that she has a much higher sex drive but her husband cant or dont provide her anymore so she has to find pleasure elsewhere, ending up feeling very guilty about it and thoughts of suicidal came into her mind.

Any advice would be appreciated.

She has a higher sex drvie after having a baby!

Fucking lucky husband man....
And the twat doesn't want to fuck her?

maybe we should trade wives?


Jim

[littlepok]

i believe the figure go haywire liao, such as flabby stomach, bigger thighs etc that turns off the husband. few women keep their perfect figure after giving birth. morally, the husband is thankful to wife for giving a child and 10months of pregnancy. however, sexually-wise, it is a turnoff at times (most of the time). dilemma right guys?