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Matters of the Heart. Has a Commercial Fuck turned into a torrid Love Affair which has turned your life upside down? Fear not. We have experts here who can help you through your roller coaster ride. Tell us your story and we'll do our best to help. |
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#211
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Re: Those with Fuck Buddies, Little 3s 小三, Friends with benefits fall in....
VOGS,
Before I reply, are there kids involved. How many and how old? |
#212
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Re: Those with Fuck Buddies, Little 3s 小三, Friends with benefits fall in....
0 kids bro..honestly, i dk what are my life objectives as of now..i have zero commitment.
__________________
Life goes on... Up-List: (Minimum reputation 6 to exchange thank u) |
#213
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Re: Those with Fuck Buddies, Little 3s 小三, Friends with benefits fall in....
Er.....then why are you holding on to your marriage?? I am not telling you to leave or stay with your wife. I am telling you it will be painful to straddle 2 women. Be firm, choose 1.
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#214
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Re: Those with Fuck Buddies, Little 3s 小三, Friends with benefits fall in....
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My sentiments exactly. Sex bonds. Rant on. I suppose this is what this thread is for. We men always brain fcuk ourselves. Because we have this thing called the Dick which dictates our actions. Whats new? I stand by what I wrote - I see many good people making bad choices. You already know what you need to do. Its a matter of choosing when to snap out of your Matrix world. "After this, there is no turning back. You take the blue pill—the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill—you stay in Wonderland, and I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes. Remember: all I'm offering is the truth." |
#215
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Re: Those with Fuck Buddies, Little 3s 小三, Friends with benefits fall in....
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Just ranting, very emotional ranting. |
#216
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Re: Those with Fuck Buddies, Little 3s 小三, Friends with benefits fall in....
Being kpo here... since no kids, why don't you ask yourself if you still love your wife enough to stay married? Otherwise don't waste her youth n time by keeping her by your side. It's selfish and both unhappy. In life we must be happy cos we only live once.
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#217
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Re: Those with Fuck Buddies, Little 3s 小三, Friends with benefits fall in....
bro you are not alone...
__________________
The Best Way to overcome heart break is in the arms of another. You focus on making money, you get girls, you focus on your body, you get sex, you focus on the girl, you get NOTHING but heartache and disappointment |
#218
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Re: Those with Fuck Buddies, Little 3s 小三, Friends with benefits fall in....
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If it doesn't work out, at least you know you tried. Just walk away and start afresh.
__________________
" ADVERTISING SPACE FOR RENT "
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#219
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Re: Those with Fuck Buddies, Little 3s 小三, Friends with benefits fall in....
I was married, had been with my wife for 15 years. Then I left her 2 months short of our 10 year wedding anniversary.
We were parents to two beautiful children, who are in their late teens now, but were only seven and nine years old when I walked out. I travelled for work, stayed in a different hotel at least three nights a week. That’s how I met Eve*. We got to know each other over time. We became Facebook friends. We sent messages to each other all day and night. She was also married, also had two kids. We had so much in common, we soon fell in love. I felt like she 'got' me. This was all during a very trying time in my marriage. I wasn’t happy, I didn’t look forward to going home. My wife had put on weight, we hardly ever spoke, she always looked so miserable. Little did I realise that I was the reason she was so down and depressed. I didn’t pay her any attention. I took her for granted. I was too busy wishing my life was more exciting, being romanced online, spending all of my free time thinking how I could get out. I believed she didn’t love me. I convinced myself she never cared about me or my needs and wants and wishes, that all I was was a paycheck. She spent her free time taking care of us -- our kids, making our suppers, doing out washing, making lunches, doing homework, projects, shuttling kids to sport, taking care of the pets they loved so much, their friends, and had a job of her own on top of it all. Every time she spoke to me, all I heard was nagging and whining. But she was actually begging for my attention: a weekend away, a date night, a movie -- everything I ended up doing with Eve behind her back and after I left my family. We argued and fought because we felt unheard by the other. And yet that was all we actually had to do – LISTEN – to each other! I moved out of home to be with Eve. My now ex-wife got custody of our kids. I saw them every second weekend, the usual 'Dad' set up. New beginnings Life was sweet! Eve and I had an amazing sex life. A connection I believed I never had with my ex. We had a large circle of friends. My family loved her. My kids liked her. But my ex could never bring herself to meet Eve – she felt betrayed. I hated her even more! She was childish. She was mean. She never cared about me or my happiness. I didn’t care about my ex’s feelings when I posted photos of us on Facebook… I had Eve and a whole new life and it was fantastic! We were together for about six or seven years but never married – we believed marriage was not our thing. I believed that after 15 years with my ex, we’d given it all we could and our time together was up, there was nothing we could do to salvage our relationship or marriage. Eve was my future, Eve was who I should have been with all along. Eventually, no matter how well we got along in the beginning; no matter how well I thought she “got” me; no matter how good the sex was; the “honeymoon” came to an end. Eve and I started snapping at each other. Little fights here and there. I had a moment of pure realisation one night, at about 2am. I realised that I missed the woman who created my first home and family. I realised that if I'd treated my ex-wife the way I’d treated Eve, used the hours I spend woo-ing Eve on my ex, she’d have bloomed. If I’d stopped being negative about her and our relationship to my family and friends they wouldn’t have been so negative to her and she wouldn’t have pulled into herself and shied away. She became someone I convinced myself I no longer knew or got along with because I never gave her the time and affection and attention she craved and deserved. I thought I had, but when I got down and really thought about it I never really did. I never really let her in. I had ended my marriage years before with the simple decision that she was no longer who or what I wanted. And I’d convinced my family and friends the same – that she was no good for me! Regret sets in But I was wrong. I missed the best years of my kids lives. Missed being a family with them. I let their mother battle with raising them alone. Yes I helped financially, but a man living outside his family has no real idea what the costs are on the single mother. While Eve and I ate steaks on the weekends, my ex-wife was living on egg and toast. And do you know that she never complained? She never demanded more money out of me. She never stopped me from seeing the kids. Never said no if I changed plans on her at the last minute. She gave up her weekends so that my mother could spend time with her grandchildren. She left me to get on with my life with Eve, even though it must have killed her. Like any relationship, it had started out good – great in fact – but when it go bad I decided to leave… I walked out and divorced a woman who – and I can only see this now – would have done anything for me. But I’d told myself she wouldn’t or couldn’t. My ex-wife stayed single for 8 years. She dated but never got involved. Her being single was also a kind of affirmation for me – that no one wanted her – that everything I’d decided she lacked, so did other men… She actually stayed single to focus on our children. Too late And then came the day she met Craig. I never thought it would bug me in any way if she got a boyfriend. I thought it would be great! But I was very wrong. I felt hurt. I felt jealous. I even felt angry and maybe betrayed. She moved in with Craig, along with my kids. She set up a new home. A new family, with my kids… it was a very bitter pill to swallow. I finally understood how she’d felt all these years. And it felt rotten. I watched via Facebook and through conversations with our old mutual friends how Craig spoiled her and the kids. Their weekends were spent on the beach – he surfed with my son. They went hiking in the Burg. They went to Mauritius where he proposed on a kayak and she said yes -- they got married. My daughter was a bridesmaid. My son was a groomsman. Craig’s parents and brother welcomed my ex-wife and children into their family. They told everyone how blessed they were to be gaining them as family. She glowed with happiness. She radiated love and none of it was for me! My heart felt like it had been ripped out. It should have been me. Don’t be me. You think you will never be happy when you are in a rut. It is when you are there at your darkest that you need to grip down and try your hardest. Today I live alone and still only see my kids occasionally. They are big now and harbour anger towards me for leaving them and their mother. Who can blame them? Of all the things Eve was, she was never the mother of my children – my original true love." "HOPE this helps a few marriages, Love and appreciate a Good woman". #Allos_of_Mr_Lakusu Last edited by Siriusam; 22-02-2018 at 09:54 AM. |
#220
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Re: Those with Fuck Buddies, Little 3s 小三, Friends with benefits fall in....
I would like to point you guys to an old thread that I bookmarked years ago. Hope you find some enlightenment from the read.
https://thesbf.shop/showthread.php?t=185502 Change yourself, change the world. |
#221
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Re: Those with Fuck Buddies, Little 3s 小三, Friends with benefits fall in....
FB or SB, I think once it gets too long, emotions start to set in. It is time to move on once that happens.
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#222
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Re: Those with Fuck Buddies, Little 3s 小三, Friends with benefits fall in....
Siriusam,
Wow!! Just wow. Your story is so poignant. So beautiful, yet so sad. Left me gobsmacked. It is too good to be stuck in the middle of this thread. Can you do the bros here a favour and start a new thread with it? I am sure many will benefit from your wisdom. "Change yourself, change the world" - so true. I have always believed that IF a man can change his MIND, he can change his LIFE. One should not always insist on the way he views things / views his wife / views his marriage. But unfortunately, most men are stubborn. Last edited by MoeLanYong; 22-02-2018 at 12:37 AM. |
#223
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Re: Those with Fuck Buddies, Little 3s 小三, Friends with benefits fall in....
Repeated story forwarded on facebook....
Anyway can't paint all situations with the same paintbrush... each situation is different and sometimes us guys give way too much and get taken advantage of by feminist wives. So good luck with the guy controlling/leading the relationship philosophy that you've got going on...
__________________
In Melbourne.. |
#224
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Re: Those with Fuck Buddies, Little 3s 小三, Friends with benefits fall in....
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#225
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Re: Those with Fuck Buddies, Little 3s 小三, Friends with benefits fall in....
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While you are well meaning, like a brother commented, you appear self righteous, a bit like friends of "Job." You get what I mean ... You lack empathy because you do not have a real story to tell where we can relate to. |
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