R21 jokes to share. - Page 14

mabel211 · #**196** 20-03-2013, 02:50 PM

why don't continue liao ):

ChairmanMao · #**197** 21-03-2013, 02:03 AM

Please continue guys

21MARTELL · #**198** 11-04-2013, 03:13 PM

Sorry bro for such a long wait, but waiting is good too :P ! As i have more and funnier jokes to share... <3

There was a shoe sales man sitting in his store when a beautiful woman comes in. He looks at her and can't stop staring. While helping her try on a pair of shoes he glances up her skirt to find she isn't wearing any panties. He starts thinking and lets something slip out and blurts, "I'd like to fill your pussy with ice cream and lick it all out!" Hearing this the woman runs out to tell her husband. "Honey, this shoe salesman said he'd like to fill my pussy up with ice cream and lick it all out! Now go kick his ass!" The husband replies "Sweetheart, anyone that can eat that much ice cream, I ain't fuckin' with!"

21MARTELL · #**199** 11-04-2013, 03:24 PM

Little Johnny was sitting in class doing math problems when his teacher picked him to answer a question.

“Johnny, if there were five birds sitting on a fence and you shot one with your gun, how many would be left?”

“None.”, replied Johnny,”cause the rest would fly away.”

“Well, the answer is four,” said the teacher. “But I like the way you are thinking.”

Little Johnny said, “I have a question for you now. If there were three women eating ice cream cones in a shop, one licking her cone, the second biting her cone, and the third one sucking her cone, which one is married?

“Well,” said the teacher nervously, “I guess the one sucking the cone?”

“No,” said Little Johnny, “the one with the wedding ring on her finger. But I like the way you’re thinking!”

21MARTELL · #**200** 11-04-2013, 03:31 PM

Little Johnny and Clarissa are walking down the street,

when Little johnny says to Clarissa 'Climb up that tree and ill give you $5 '

So she climbed up the tree, and received $5.

She went home shouting 'mommy mommy i received $5 from Johnny just for climbing up the tree!'

Her mom looked at her and said 'He just wants to see your underwear.'

The next day Little Johnny said 'Climb up the tree and ill give you $25'

So she climbed up the tree happily knowing she would receive $25.

She ran home shouting 'mommy mommy! I received $25 from Little Johnny for climbing up the tree!

I'M RICH!' Her mom sighed and said, 'Clarissa, I've told you this before..He just wants to see your underwear'

The next day Little Johnny did the same thing, But this time he offered her $50.

She climbed up happily and ran home to her mom saying 'mommy mommy! LOOK! I got $50 from Little Johnny for climbing up the tree!'

Her mom said 'LOOK, I've told you this before.. he just wants to see your underwear!'

Clarissa sighed, 'But mommy, I tricked Johnny! Today I didn't wear any underwear!' Her mom fainted.

21MARTELL · #**201** 11-04-2013, 05:26 PM

This is a funny joke if you understand :P

Little Johnny's father sat down next to him on the couch one day and said, "Okay, Johnny, once there was this big, black rooster, and it was sitting on a fence post. How many wings does the rooster have?"
Johnny replied, "It has two."
Little Johnny's father then asked, "How many eyes does the rooster have?" Johnny replied, "It has two."
Little Johnny's father then asked, "Well then, how many legs do you think the rooster had?"
Johnny replied, "It has two, daddy."

So then, Little Johnny's daddy said, "Well then, a big white cat walks up to where the big black rooster is standing on the fence post and opens its mouth to hiss at the rooster. How many teeth does the cat have?"
Little Johnny scratched his head and replied, "I don't know daddy, how many teeth does the cat have?"
Little Johnny's daddy grabbed him by the arm and exclaimed, "Alright boy, how come you know so much about big black cock & so little about white pussy?"

21MARTELL · #**202** 11-04-2013, 05:26 PM

i hope brothers here are still interested in my jokes ):

xAhKingx · #**203** 11-04-2013, 05:30 PM

Support support

UnitTrusts · #**204** 11-04-2013, 08:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 21MARTELL

"Stay here and stir the sauce dear," says the mother. "This is a job for Mama!"

HAHAHA I liked this one on page 13

21MARTELL · #**205** 23-04-2013, 01:21 AM

THE BEST DIVORCE LETTER EVER! Dear Wife, I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you forever. I’ve been a good man to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show for it. These last 2 weeks have been hell. ... Your boss called to tell me that you quit your job today & that was the last straw. Last week, you came home & didn’t even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers. You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don’t tell me you love me anymore; you don’t want sex or anything that connects us as husband & wife. Either you’re cheating on me or you don’t love me anymore; whatever the case, I’m gone. Your EX-Husband P.S. don’t try to find me. Your SISTER & I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!

——Dear Ex-Husband Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It’s true you & I have been married for 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what you’ve been. I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constant whining & griping Too bad that doesn’t work. I DID notice when you got a hair cut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was ‘You look just like a girl!’ Since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can’t say something nice, I didn’t comment. And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 years ago. About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still & I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning. After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could work it out. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica But when I got home you were gone.. Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won’t get a dime from me. So take care. Signed, Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell & Free! P.S. I don’t know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was born Carl. I hope that’s not a problem.

21MARTELL · #**206** 15-06-2016, 01:30 AM

After more then 3 years

21MARTELL · #**207** 15-06-2016, 01:30 AM

My wife wants me to get my coffee at home to save money. If she really wants me to save money she should give me sex at home.

21MARTELL · #**208** 15-06-2016, 01:42 AM

Your face would look better between my legs.

21MARTELL · #**209** 15-06-2016, 01:48 AM

How is a woman like a condom?
Both of them spend more time in your wallet than on your dick.

Skerf33 · #**210** 15-06-2016, 03:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 21MARTELL

THE BEST DIVORCE LETTER EVER! Dear Wife, I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you forever. I’ve been a good man to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show for it. These last 2 weeks have been hell. ... Your boss called to tell me that you quit your job today & that was the last straw. Last week, you came home & didn’t even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers. You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don’t tell me you love me anymore; you don’t want sex or anything that connects us as husband & wife. Either you’re cheating on me or you don’t love me anymore; whatever the case, I’m gone. Your EX-Husband P.S. don’t try to find me. Your SISTER & I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!

——Dear Ex-Husband Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It’s true you & I have been married for 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what you’ve been. I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constant whining & griping Too bad that doesn’t work. I DID notice when you got a hair cut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was ‘You look just like a girl!’ Since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can’t say something nice, I didn’t comment. And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 years ago. About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still & I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning. After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could work it out. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica But when I got home you were gone.. Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won’t get a dime from me. So take care. Signed, Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell & Free! P.S. I don’t know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was born Carl. I hope that’s not a problem.

Hahaha this is funny!!!

Welcome back TS, post more jokes please