How to get rid of heart pain from breakup?

[dieth1234]

Any methods used by anyone before?

I tried many methods but the pain is there.

[MatthewC]

Its never going away till you realize its over. The quicker you get there the better for you and everyone around you. Hope you get your light bulb moment soon.

[guyorgirl]

Find something to occupy your time, like a game console, or housework, or find friends.

Your mind needs to let go and do something else for a change. The lifestyle you have with a SO/gf needs replacement.

Jogging, exercising during the dating schedules you always planned helps to change your lifestyle away - or at least until you start dating again.

[stoicism]

Piak someone new

[Fellowes]

If it is really over, you need some sort of closure. My breakup breakup with my ex of 7 years was tough. But i made a effort to throw all the things she gave me and deleted all photos. When doing it I mentally tell myself this is over and move on. Everyone have different way of seeking closure.

[Cheesebeast]

Having been through quite a number of relationships and breakups, for me i will exercise and gym really hard (a lot harder than my normal routine). The physical training and fatigue helps me forget the emotional pain. Plus it gets me extra shredded which increases my confidence when meeting new women.

But this is just for me. You need to find your own distraction or motivation.

[newyorker88]

It is all in ur mind. Make it a point that when it is over, it is over, no need to drag. As some brothers mentioned, the faster, the better. Do some things to distract urself over the thoughts, time helps, but it is usually within one self to let go for good. No one can help if u don’t wish to let go urself

[Xgenre]

Only you can help yourself. Just ask yourself honestly;

1. Are there things in the past relationship that you want but did not manage to get? (Get what you want... like want things to be better, want her or you to change)

2. Are there things in the past relationship that you did not want but unfortunately is now with you? (Don't want what you get...Like being dumped)

3. If the answers to either or both questions are Yes, then is there anything you can do to change the situation?

4. If yes, work on it. If the answer is no, then recognise that things are no longer within your control. For things that are beyond your control, be kind to yourself and move on. If you choose not to move on, then you are back to questions 1 and 2. It is a mental loop where you always think of the same things (get what you want or don't want what you get) but you have no way of doing it in real life (question 3). So the thoughts just keep turning in circles inside your mind.

Love yourself more in times like this. See that you are suffering from this breakup and hope that you can help yourself end this suffering. See that your mental loop is the source of your suffering and it will be easier to move on.

[secretlurker88]

go and fuck 3 girls. this has worked for me....

I was quite heartbroken in oct, then i fucked..i think 3 girls. have 3 more in the lineup. but now the pain is no longer quite there anymore. not the same.

but take care bro. fate will decide and help you..

otherwise go running, do some sports. hope you'd get out of this.

[coypredator]

A simple question with no easy or real solution. You are the only solution to get over the breakup - there are several things you should do. Lose your ego and express your feelings to the person one last time. If she ignores or ditches you, you know there's nothing in your control and you did your best.

Recognize that it is normal for you to losing sleep and appetite and focus from doing anything. Everything is just bland for you. That is the way it is.

Now that is done, reflect on how you lost so much self respect to chase this girl and how lousy you were. But you ain't really that lousy. You were doing fine before meeting this girl. How did you end up here? Is she the only girl that can give you what you want? Are there other people that care about you? Are you gonna neglect them?

Now, work on yourself, cry it out, delete the contact and social media. Write down any thoughts or memories and toss it away. Meet new girls, go learn something new, go work yourself out.

You should be able to get yourself out of this in 1 week to 3 months time.

[unsung80]

The quicker you let go, the faster you can move on.

[shaoyun]

Time is a good doctor.

[fuckingbaby]

Find a healthy hobby, expand your social circle, meet new people etc. All these helped alot after my breakup. Be emotionally and mentally healthy.

[thor1981]

Bro it just takes time. Give it at least 3-6 months. This is normal, just be patient for this duration.

It's funny how it take so long to feel better but just give it time. Do not try to run away or cover up the pain with FL, drink, smoke etc. Just give it time, but have faith something better is waiting afterwards (for me happened every time, better girl)

In the meantime, try get into new hobby/workout, anything to increase your confidence.

But just give it time. I know , a 3 year marriage ended and also before that girl i dated since JC for 4 years. Both times, it took 3-6 months recovery.

Secret is to learn from the breakup and actually come out a better/stronger/more confident guy after 3-6 months. good luck ah.

[secretlurker88]

Originally Posted by thor1981

Bro it just takes time. Give it at least 3-6 months. This is normal, just be patient for this duration.

It's funny how it take so long to feel better but just give it time. Do not try to run away or cover up the pain with FL, drink, smoke etc. Just give it time, but have faith something better is waiting afterwards (for me happened every time, better girl)

In the meantime, try get into new hobby/workout, anything to increase your confidence.

But just give it time. I know , a 3 year marriage ended and also before that girl i dated since JC for 4 years. Both times, it took 3-6 months recovery.

Secret is to learn from the breakup and actually come out a better/stronger/more confident guy after 3-6 months. good luck ah.

solid advice bro.