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#91
15-05-2014, 10:29 AM
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Re: Love found at the wrong time with the wrong person
Hi TS, hope things turn out for the better. Your last words to her are touching.
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#92
15-05-2014, 10:59 AM
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Re: Love found at the wrong time with the wrong person
In time, it is absolutely vital to put the pain behind you and move forward with your life and love. Otherwise, you are giving away your power to the people who hurt you.Sometimes the relationship you need to rescue is the one with yourself. Moving past a breakup is about you, not your her.
Grief is a process to go through, not a destination in which to wallow. In a process, you keep putting one foot in front of the other, and each little step is part of your healing. 有多少东西，你们曾经以为会爱一辈子，一辈子的盟约，总是在你们最想拥有对方的时候许下的，那个时侯，你真 的这样想…… 遇上那个人的时候，你以为自己会爱她一辈子。 她已经这么好了，她怎么可以离你而去？然而，岁月会让你知道，一辈子的心愿，真的只是个心愿。爱情永远是想 象比现实美丽，相逢如是，告别也如是, 兄弟!无论你给我什么借口，你说无法忍受寂寞也好，想寻求真爱也好，其实这都无所谓了，借口只是一个借口， 你说了这么多事实是什么呢？事实也无所谓了，人生活在这世界上本身就应该安安稳稳的走完，只有这样才能平静 的过完人生，虽然会很孤独，很寂寞，但是任何事，真的只要习惯就好，习惯就好了! 别那么悲观嘛~心灵有家生命才有路! Excellent writing with near perfect grammar and spelling. Good job!
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#94
15-05-2014, 12:29 PM
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Re: Love found at the wrong time with the wrong person
I m in similar situation like TS except that we been together for more than 3 years already. Both of us r married when we knew each other, love just came unexpectedly. Many things happened during last 3 years, good n bad. Now I have separated with my wife cos I simply do not want to hurt her n my daughter anymore but my love 1 is still with her family.
We both married early due n perhaps we both did not experienced much love in life that is y we fell in love so deeply n badly too. During these few years of secret relationship, we actually was caught before, not only once but more than 3 times already, so things with her n her husband is now on the edge. We just came back from our 4 days overseas trip but unfortunately, we were being caught again. I really love her a lot n same goes for her but she just could not let go of her family, she is too soft hearted, she cannot stand it if her family hate her for abandoning the family n b with me. I wish to be with her badly but I m prepared to break up with her if she chooses her family cos I cannot bear to see her suffer like that. Because of this r/s, I lost my house, sold my car, lost my daughter n even lost my job twice (if u believe in karma). Love is really amazing, things I have done with her, I have never did with my wife before. This is not just lust, I can just look at her whole day, hug her whole day n I will be satisfied as long as she is with me. We had the most wonderful overseas together n it felt so real, like she is my wife already. Actually TS knows there will not b any result being with M, since M already made her point that she is guilty of being with TS, I think it is best to leave it as it is.
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#95
15-05-2014, 12:54 PM
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Re: Love found at the wrong time with the wrong person
Quote:
 i beg to differ ... you confirm my "economic tragedy" theory ... if bro TS can give M enough $ to M husband, then M would not feel guilty at all ... in fact she may even be happy that she can help her (ex) husband have a better life/start same for you ... if you had enough $ to take care of your wife & daughter and your love 1 family ...then i see no problem why you 2 can't together ... that's the lesson i learn't and now am focusing myself to make enough to settle my own family first ...and enough for the next one ...to be responsible to all parties  ... its not an option for me not be ...
__________________
MEMENTO MORI - "remember that we are all going to die" come wit notin, leave wit notin. all we have r our experiences. make them da best. b true to yourself
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#96
15-05-2014, 01:21 PM
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Re: Love found at the wrong time with the wrong person
Quote:
I just hope she can make a wise decision soon, regardless who she choose Last edited by otacon; 15-05-2014 at 01:33 PM.
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#97
15-05-2014, 02:01 PM
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Re: Love found at the wrong time with the wrong person
Quote:
but harsh reality is ...no money no talk ... this is ang mo version, best i can find ... http://fyeahmovieclub.tumblr.com/pos...tic-than-women but asian women/culture look at us "economically"  .... sorry to be crude ...its ingrained in them they look to the man to take care of them and the kids ... i don't agree to this view point ... but that's the fact jack ... your love 1 "wise" decsision may not be based solely on how much she loves you, but who can take care of her best ... the reality for her will sink in ... but i hope i am sooo wrong ... 
__________________
MEMENTO MORI - "remember that we are all going to die" come wit notin, leave wit notin. all we have r our experiences. make them da best. b true to yourself Last edited by PeteTsang69; 15-05-2014 at 02:51 PM. Reason: typo
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#98
15-05-2014, 02:26 PM
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Re: Love found at the wrong time with the wrong person
Quote:
Actually I should have enough to provide for her n our new family in future but maybe not as what she imagine. a roof over the head should not b a problem as long as I stay working but no one can predict the future
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#100
15-05-2014, 03:05 PM
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Re: Love found at the wrong time with the wrong person
Quote:
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#101
15-05-2014, 03:34 PM
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Re: Love found at the wrong time with the wrong person
Nice touching story bro! Hope you will find happiness within yourself.
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#102
15-05-2014, 08:25 PM
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Re: Love found at the wrong time with the wrong person
I believe love is something which one cannot control.
Seeing all your replies reminds me of relationship with my husband last time. I remember before marriage, he would shower me with so much love through his action as he has a competitor at that time as well. Maybe it's because I'm not completely "his", that's why. The grass is always greener on the other side. What you don't own always seems more beautiful then what you have. And then we were married. I give birth to a beautiful daughter. Things starts to change when my daughter is 3. He's having an affair outside with his ex classmate. That time, when he choose to give up this family for that woman, my whole world crumpled. Where is the passionate loving guy who used to want and love me so much went to? All I can say is, even if you manage to get the one you really wanted after being married, most probably everything will happen again like a vicious cycle. Who can guarantee that when you finally get the third party to be by your side, you would have a happily ever after as an ending? By all means I'm not here to shoot anyone, I'm just voicing out my pov as a wife whose husband had been unfaithful before.
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#103
16-05-2014, 06:30 AM
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Re: Love found at the wrong time with the wrong person
*So sad to hear so much stories and people that can relate to mine. All i can say is that we can plan for the best but in the end we are just pawn in our own destiny. I wished the best for everyone.
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#104
16-05-2014, 07:31 AM
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Re: Love found at the wrong time with the wrong person
She didn't reply to my message after that. But from where i could see, she was crying. And then it all became clear to me. She still love me, but love for us is a luxury item we cannot afford. Being in our current position, we had our responsibilities and obligations. We made the choice we had made, to our families and partners. Love for us has to be felt and cannot be expressed, not in any forms of words or deeds. I felt a shot of bitterness running through my heart. The bitter truth of life for us, no matter how much we wanted to be with one another, neither of us were prepared to hurt those that still cared for us and unknown of the affair. They must never know, if by any chance that should either marriage fail, it should be for any reasons but a affair. Means of reconciliation must be explored and until the last bit of effort had expired, or else it should be the last resort. It should never be bcoz of our own selfish need. Yes, some may ask then what about what we want? As sad as it is, the ultimate truth is that we made the choice to married our partners and the vows that we took had it certain significance. So what if we get our heart desire by getting a divorce and have the relationship that we always wanted? If that was our approach then one possible scenario will be this: we will live with the guilt for the rest of our lives, in the back of my mind will always be that if she could do this to her husband then what's stopping her from doing the same to me? What happen when that happen too....too much variables in life that could happen....too much too many...
It was time for me to leave and i just packed my desk and went off without saying much. Then M messaged me to remind me that i have forgotten my jacket which i had brought along for the interview so immediately i went back to collect it. Automatically when i reached my desk, i would always looked into the way where she is sitting but she wasn't there. Feeling a little disappointed that i cannot see her before i go, i just took my jacket and went down to my ride. Just as i got into the car, she left me another message saying that she was afraid to see me then she will cry so she purposefully left her desk. I guessed as much so i replied by telling her to take care of herself and that i miss her. I do not know what will happen in the future but this i know, she will be my motivation to work harder than before. I wrote another letter to her but i never send to her. Sometime, certain things are better left unsaid... To my dearest baby, Meeting you was the best thing that ever happened to me. It made me realized what true love is and what it really meant to love someone unconditionally. But it's a pity that we met each other at the wrong time. There are so many things that i want to tell you but i will not. From today onwards i will love you silently. I may not be the man that ended up with but i will become the man that you want. I will have a picture of you in my mind, probably time will make the missing part lesser but you will always be that special someone in my life. I will never forget the time we spent together, i will never forget the words and promises we made to one another. I am letting go of you now, i need to move on and make my life worth something while i still can. But you will be there with me wherever i go, living in my mind. Because of you, i lost my sky of adventure. But because of you, i found my ocean. Losing you felt like i lost my entire world. But i will survive, i must. There are so many things i want to do with you, places to go with you, but i will do it in memories of you. I will go and find my own happiness now, i don't know if i will ever find someone like you but that i will leave it to fate. Take care now my love, be happy always. I won't turn back now but i hope you will always remember that there's someone that loved you. And if you ever remember me, i hope it will bring a smile to you by just thinking about it. I really miss you alot, and i will always love you. Now and forever. *The End*
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#105
16-05-2014, 08:11 AM
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Re: Love found at the wrong time with the wrong person
Cheers to the TS. I am in a similar situation. Started off romantically... recently .. she started to ask... "what do we expect to get after all this?" I am her first man outside marriage. She is my 11th but the longest.. almost 3 years..
i stopped talking to gers at pubs.. i can travel 20kms just to have lunch with her everyday. Maybe i am no longer in her priority list. She no longer feels excited to meet me. She seen too many couples which divorced. No good outcome..she claims.
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