My Experience

[viceman]

Originally Posted by SiLLymE

This thread was started for me to share my PAST experience, let me emphasise on the word PAST, and to record my train of thoughts during those days.
When I ended the last post with me yearning to test other treasures, it is NOT an open invitation.

When Present doesn't take place, where got Past??? If you wanna sample exotic ones from Indonesia, come Jakarta look for me, ok?

[SiLLymE]

I did not explore that idea further and perhaps would not have, if J had not unwittingly driven me to react.

By then, I had met J for a couple of months already, and we met regularly. Often he would drop by for dinner, and in the beginning I spent hours before our appointment laboring over the preparation of the meal. I was a terrible cook, still am, but that little tiny fact didn’t stop me from trying to impress J with my non-existent culinary skills. I borrowed cooking books, surfed websites for delicious sounding recipes and pondered over mouth-watering pictures of dishes worthy of top fine-dining restaurants. Ever optimistic and perhaps a tad over-confident, I was usually disappointed that the recipes were a let-down, that the pieces of black charred meat I set on the table did not in anyway resemble the veal scaloppini or prime rib in the pictures.

I would probably be so frustrated by my efforts by then, that I imagined J could have sniffed the burnt meat smell at my doorstep and some kind soul would be alarmed enough to call the fire station. When J arrived, he took a quick glance at the dinner table, at my gloomy face and the short pink frilly apron I had slipped on, which did nothing to cover the fact I was totally nude underneath. He would close the wooden door softly, rested his back against the door, and appraise the situation silently. And then he would kiss me gently on the forehead and remind me with his actions that food was the last thing he had in mind for the evening and that I was the appetizer, main course and dessert.

Spending so much time together with another person who showered you with the loving attention you craved after having been in lacking relationship, some of you might have guessed it. I fell for J, hard. I looked forward to meeting him. I was constantly thinking of him and missing him. Whenever he called me to chat over the phone, I memorized every single word he said to me and replayed them again in my head later on. I agonized over the fact that he might be meeting other girls from internet as well, fucking them, doing the same things he did with me, saying the same words, and that thought alone tore me up. I was making myself crazy with this uncertainty.

One day, I decided that I had to reveal my true feelings to J. Either I was just another fuck buddy to him, and he did not share this feeling I harbored, or else I was someone special to him. I contacted him and we arranged to meet at Junction 8 for dinner. For the first time, I felt happy. Finally I was doing the right thing and I was positive he reciprocated my love. I was early and I decided to walk around. There was a huge sale at Giordano, and I elbowed my way through the Auntys crowding around, ignoring the accusing glares and rebukes. I bought a bright yellow polo Tshirt for J, with buttons low enough to reveal his toned body if he left it unbuttoned, and was soon so caught up in my fantasy of how much I’d love to strip the shirt off him later on, that I didn’t notice him walking towards me, smiling.

He greeted me with a peck on the cheek. I was touched and passed him the shirt. With a wicked grin, he said that was the gift for his gigolo services. I laughed it off, but his words stuck in my mind. We had dinner at one of the fast food outlet and throughout the entire time, conversation flowed between us easily. This convinced me more that he was the one for me. Just as we finished dinner and I was preparing myself for the big speech, J leaned over, beside me. We were seated at those comfortable rows of leather padded seats which lined one whole wall of the fast food chain. He rested his hand casually on my lap and my heart skipped a beat at the sudden skin contact on my naked thigh and suddenly I felt too warm and stuffy in my sleeveless cotton tee. He came even nearer, his mouth barely inches away, and whispered in my ear, his breath tickling my face “How do you feel?”

I licked my dry lips, cleared my throat and admitted truthfully “Hot”. Using his other hand, he wiped away the perspiration that started to collect on the skin between my upper lips and my nose. I cringed inwardly, embarrassed that he was near enough to see sweat on my skin. He smiled at my reply, kissed me gently below my ears, at my neck and the wonderful ticklish sensation immediately drew a sharp gasp from me. Pleasure shot through my body and I felt myself grow moist with lust. “….and?” he whispered, using the opportunity to lick a little path up my neck to my ear, nibbling on my earlobe.

By now, my eyes were closed and I shuddered in appreciation. “Wet… Hot and wet” I whispered, barely able to form the words. His hand had creep up under my skirt, behind my bag which I had placed on my lap. Using my bag to hide what his hand was doing from curious eyes, he rubbed my intimate part through the tiny triangular piece of G-string I had taken to wearing recently. His eyes flashed in appreciation when he realized I was indeed very wet with lust for him. He smiled and dug his fingers under my panty, easily inserting two fingers into my juice-coated pussy. “My my… aren’t you one horny babe” he teased. I blushed and grabbed hold of his arm, trying to push his hand away. Flicking his thumb against the agitated bud of my clitoris, he quickly withdrew his fingers and plunged them to the hilt again, repeating this two more times and I moaned softly, squeezing his arm.

He paused, and when I opened my eyes, I found him studying me, with a strange little smile on his lips. I was aghast to see sticky white stains on his fingers. He sniffed his fingers, and then quickly dipped both fingers into his mouth, closing his lips tightly and licked it clean. Grabbing a napkin from the tray, he wiped the fingers that were previously deep in my pussy. “C’mon, let’s get out of here” He led me down to the basement. Walking amongst the chattering housewives and noisy children cooled my ardor and I started protesting when he pulled me into the handicap toilet and locked the door. “What if someone needs to use the toilet? What if we’re caught? Oh man, this is gonna be embarrassing!!” I worried unnecessarily.

“Shhh” he said as took my bag from me and dropped it on the floor. Luckily the toilet looked clean and dry. He turned me around, bent me at the waist and flipped my knee length skirt up from behind, exposing my black lacy G-string. I obeyed and kept quiet, putting my hands on the metal railing near the toilet seat. I thought he was going to continue the finger-fucking but I heard him unzip his pants and then I felt the tip of his aroused cock touch my pussy lips tentatively, testing the moisture, rubbing in small circles. Spreading my ass cheeks apart, he positioned his cock smack at the entrance to my cunt. With one swift motion, he rammed his bursting erection into my pussy and I felt the walls of my cunt opening to welcome this delightful intruder and closing back in on his hardened cock in a snug fit. I was instantly transported back to the pleasure zone suspended from his finger fucking earlier. Without pausing, he withdrew and thrusted again and again. Biting my lips, I was still unable to control the loud moans each time he plunged into me. Reaching under my shirt, he shoved my bra aside roughly, and managed to release my right breast from the constraints of the material. He grabbed it roughly, kneading my tender flesh in rhythm to the pounding of his cock, pinching my sensitive nipple and rolling it between his thumb and finger.

It was a short fuck. Both of us were so turned on by the thrill of being caught, that we came almost after ten to twenty thrusts. With his final lunge, he squeezed my boob almost painfully as he spurted his seed into me and his body jerked in spasms against my back.

When we recovered and I pulled up my lacy panty to cup my swollen pussy, I blurted out “I think I’m in love with you” to him. Thinking back, I sure had an awful sense of timing, but at that time, I was filled with such tenderness that I could not with-hold the truth from him any longer. He was actually poised on tip-toe against the wall sink, trying to clean his shrinking cock with running water from the tap and I had blurted out those loving words to his back. He froze halfway, looking at me through my reflection in the mirror, probably searching my face for hints of amusement. There was an uncomfortable pause.

Certainly I was naïve from inexperience and youth but nobody would accuse me of being foolish and dull-witted. Thus, from that little pause, everything cleared for me. I knew my mistake then and could only blame myself for reading too much into his actions. I will never forget the pain that cut through me then. I vowed never to make the same mistake twice, and that I would never let myself get so vulnerable again. I will not allow any man to have the opportunity to hurt me again, ever.

Sensing the awkwardness of the situation, I tried to put him at ease again by breaking into laughter. “Gotcha!”. To my ears, my laugh sounded fake, and forced, but I must have been convincing enough as he reddened up till his ears, embarrassed to be caught apparently believing my supposed joke. Confusing situation.

We cleaned up and left the toilet and we never mentioned that episode again. Without him realizing it though, he had changed me.

He continued to be my friend throughout the years, lending me a helping hand when I needed, dishing unsought advises, crying with me during ‘sad movies’ in my life. The only thing he was unable to fulfill was the emotional attachment part and slowly I learnt to overlook that.

[sianren]

Sis, Nice account of your rendezvous, though mentally U still having image of J and Yourself rejuvenate in such pleasures experience but in reality U have to decide how U need to manage your life back....U know that one fine day J will just tell U that he attach but sexually He still want your body...

Sis move on, U living in S'pore ( unlike taiwan- 3 gals to 1 guy) life is more beauitful than stressing yourself.

Ok those may be year ago, learn to let go...

[darkice]

Originally Posted by SiLLymE

I did not explore that idea further and perhaps would not have, if J had not unwittingly driven me to react.

By then, I had met J for a couple of months already, and we met regularly. Often he would drop by for dinner, and in the beginning I spent hours before our appointment laboring over the preparation of the meal. I was a terrible cook, still am, but that little tiny fact didn’t stop me from trying to impress J with my non-existent culinary skills. I borrowed cooking books, surfed websites for delicious sounding recipes and pondered over mouth-watering pictures of dishes worthy of top fine-dining restaurants. Ever optimistic and perhaps a tad over-confident, I was usually disappointed that the recipes were a let-down, that the pieces of black charred meat I set on the table did not in anyway resemble the veal scaloppini or prime rib in the pictures.

I would probably be so frustrated by my efforts by then, that I imagined J could have sniffed the burnt meat smell at my doorstep and some kind soul would be alarmed enough to call the fire station. When J arrived, he took a quick glance at the dinner table, at my gloomy face and the short pink frilly apron I had slipped on, which did nothing to cover the fact I was totally nude underneath. He would close the wooden door softly, rested his back against the door, and appraise the situation silently. And then he would kiss me gently on the forehead and remind me with his actions that food was the last thing he had in mind for the evening and that I was the appetizer, main course and dessert.

Spending so much time together with another person who showered you with the loving attention you craved after having been in lacking relationship, some of you might have guessed it. I fell for J, hard. I looked forward to meeting him. I was constantly thinking of him and missing him. Whenever he called me to chat over the phone, I memorized every single word he said to me and replayed them again in my head later on. I agonized over the fact that he might be meeting other girls from internet as well, fucking them, doing the same things he did with me, saying the same words, and that thought alone tore me up. I was making myself crazy with this uncertainty.

One day, I decided that I had to reveal my true feelings to J. Either I was just another fuck buddy to him, and he did not share this feeling I harbored, or else I was someone special to him. I contacted him and we arranged to meet at Junction 8 for dinner. For the first time, I felt happy. Finally I was doing the right thing and I was positive he reciprocated my love. I was early and I decided to walk around. There was a huge sale at Giordano, and I elbowed my way through the Auntys crowding around, ignoring the accusing glares and rebukes. I bought a bright yellow polo Tshirt for J, with buttons low enough to reveal his toned body if he left it unbuttoned, and was soon so caught up in my fantasy of how much I’d love to strip the shirt off him later on, that I didn’t notice him walking towards me, smiling.

He greeted me with a peck on the cheek. I was touched and passed him the shirt. With a wicked grin, he said that was the gift for his gigolo services. I laughed it off, but his words stuck in my mind. We had dinner at one of the fast food outlet and throughout the entire time, conversation flowed between us easily. This convinced me more that he was the one for me. Just as we finished dinner and I was preparing myself for the big speech, J leaned over, beside me. We were seated at those comfortable rows of leather padded seats which lined one whole wall of the fast food chain. He rested his hand casually on my lap and my heart skipped a beat at the sudden skin contact on my naked thigh and suddenly I felt too warm and stuffy in my sleeveless cotton tee. He came even nearer, his mouth barely inches away, and whispered in my ear, his breath tickling my face “How do you feel?”

I licked my dry lips, cleared my throat and admitted truthfully “Hot”. Using his other hand, he wiped away the perspiration that started to collect on the skin between my upper lips and my nose. I cringed inwardly, embarrassed that he was near enough to see sweat on my skin. He smiled at my reply, kissed me gently below my ears, at my neck and the wonderful ticklish sensation immediately drew a sharp gasp from me. Pleasure shot through my body and I felt myself grow moist with lust. “….and?” he whispered, using the opportunity to lick a little path up my neck to my ear, nibbling on my earlobe.

By now, my eyes were closed and I shuddered in appreciation. “Wet… Hot and wet” I whispered, barely able to form the words. His hand had creep up under my skirt, behind my bag which I had placed on my lap. Using my bag to hide what his hand was doing from curious eyes, he rubbed my intimate part through the tiny triangular piece of G-string I had taken to wearing recently. His eyes flashed in appreciation when he realized I was indeed very wet with lust for him. He smiled and dug his fingers under my panty, easily inserting two fingers into my juice-coated pussy. “My my… aren’t you one horny babe” he teased. I blushed and grabbed hold of his arm, trying to push his hand away. Flicking his thumb against the agitated bud of my clitoris, he quickly withdrew his fingers and plunged them to the hilt again, repeating this two more times and I moaned softly, squeezing his arm.

He paused, and when I opened my eyes, I found him studying me, with a strange little smile on his lips. I was aghast to see sticky white stains on his fingers. He sniffed his fingers, and then quickly dipped both fingers into his mouth, closing his lips tightly and licked it clean. Grabbing a napkin from the tray, he wiped the fingers that were previously deep in my pussy. “C’mon, let’s get out of here” He led me down to the basement. Walking amongst the chattering housewives and noisy children cooled my ardor and I started protesting when he pulled me into the handicap toilet and locked the door. “What if someone needs to use the toilet? What if we’re caught? Oh man, this is gonna be embarrassing!!” I worried unnecessarily.

“Shhh” he said as took my bag from me and dropped it on the floor. Luckily the toilet looked clean and dry. He turned me around, bent me at the waist and flipped my knee length skirt up from behind, exposing my black lacy G-string. I obeyed and kept quiet, putting my hands on the metal railing near the toilet seat. I thought he was going to continue the finger-fucking but I heard him unzip his pants and then I felt the tip of his aroused cock touch my pussy lips tentatively, testing the moisture, rubbing in small circles. Spreading my ass cheeks apart, he positioned his cock smack at the entrance to my cunt. With one swift motion, he rammed his bursting erection into my pussy and I felt the walls of my cunt opening to welcome this delightful intruder and closing back in on his hardened cock in a snug fit. I was instantly transported back to the pleasure zone suspended from his finger fucking earlier. Without pausing, he withdrew and thrusted again and again. Biting my lips, I was still unable to control the loud moans each time he plunged into me. Reaching under my shirt, he shoved my bra aside roughly, and managed to release my right breast from the constraints of the material. He grabbed it roughly, kneading my tender flesh in rhythm to the pounding of his cock, pinching my sensitive nipple and rolling it between his thumb and finger.

It was a short fuck. Both of us were so turned on by the thrill of being caught, that we came almost after ten to twenty thrusts. With his final lunge, he squeezed my boob almost painfully as he spurted his seed into me and his body jerked in spasms against my back.

When we recovered and I pulled up my lacy panty to cup my swollen pussy, I blurted out “I think I’m in love with you” to him. Thinking back, I sure had an awful sense of timing, but at that time, I was filled with such tenderness that I could not with-hold the truth from him any longer. He was actually poised on tip-toe against the wall sink, trying to clean his shrinking cock with running water from the tap and I had blurted out those loving words to his back. He froze halfway, looking at me through my reflection in the mirror, probably searching my face for hints of amusement. There was an uncomfortable pause.

Certainly I was naïve from inexperience and youth but nobody would accuse me of being foolish and dull-witted. Thus, from that little pause, everything cleared for me. I knew my mistake then and could only blame myself for reading too much into his actions. I will never forget the pain that cut through me then. I vowed never to make the same mistake twice, and that I would never let myself get so vulnerable again. I will not allow any man to have the opportunity to hurt me again, ever.

Sensing the awkwardness of the situation, I tried to put him at ease again by breaking into laughter. “Gotcha!”. To my ears, my laugh sounded fake, and forced, but I must have been convincing enough as he reddened up till his ears, embarrassed to be caught apparently believing my supposed joke. Confusing situation.

We cleaned up and left the toilet and we never mentioned that episode again. Without him realizing it though, he had changed me.

He continued to be my friend throughout the years, lending me a helping hand when I needed, dishing unsought advises, crying with me during ‘sad movies’ in my life. The only thing he was unable to fulfill was the emotional attachment part and slowly I learnt to overlook that.

The last part sounded so sad. You have my condolences. But everytime you fall, you eventually get up and make you a stronger person.

I cannot offer you anything only this virtual little hug

*hugs*

[skypot]

Wow...Bet u score A1 for your O level
Great FR bro!

[yinyang]

Originally Posted by SiLLymE

....Without him realizing it though, he had changed me... ..dishing unsought advises, crying with me during ‘sad movies’ in my life. ..only thing he was unable to fulfill was the emotional attachment part and slowly I learnt to overlook that.

Great write up, liked the honesty..

How was it like to put pen to paper on your this watershed life experience?

[BaoBei512]

Originally Posted by SiLLymE

We cleaned up and left the toilet and we never mentioned that episode again. Without him realizing it though, he had changed me.

He continued to be my friend throughout the years, lending me a helping hand when I needed, dishing unsought advises, crying with me during ‘sad movies’ in my life. The only thing he was unable to fulfill was the emotional attachment part and slowly I learnt to overlook that.

Hi Sillyme,

I believe you are not the only one that bump into guys like this.. i can relate to that too..

Imagine that you got into a relationship with him and during the time he is not with you.. your mind will wander whether is he dating other girls, making out with other girls and all along sinking into the relationship, till the time when its harder to let go.. this senario will be worst right?

Young have the advantage to fall and learn! Salute you that you can slowly overlook the attachment part..

This is a compliment post! Keep out and try not to bruise your heart!

Cheers

BB

[SiLLymE]

Thanks BaoBei,

Overall J's a great guy, as I have found out over the years. I can rely on him for anything and everything, and I can't fault him for not being able to commit emotionally. Thinking it over, I appreciate his honesty in not misleading me with false promises and declarations of love just to get a quick fuck.

Likewise, I have slowly grown more cynical and wary of relationships or marriage and am happy with my existing friendship with J.

Been busy and have not had much time to write more, but will try to continue from where I left off.

That toilet incident left its mark on me, no matter how I looked at it. I started meeting more guys and though I did not sleep with all of them, I had my share of lovers. Those who made me laugh with their wit and sense of humour, those whom I felt comfortable talking and being with, those whom I lusted over their physique and good looks. To write about all of them would take ages, as I dont like to skim over each encounter and prefer to detail every single thing I can recall. However, I will write about those memorable ones or those that has made an impact on me.

One of my previous lovers is a young boy, lets call him A. He was only 16 yrs old at that time and I got to know him through friendster. He sent me a smile and a short greeting as well as a photo of his naked torso which tickles me no end till today. I found his confidence and youth refreshing, not to mention his well-built chest a turn-on, and after a few exchange of messages, we arranged to meet up for a movie at Tiong Bahru. Seeing as he was still studying, I had expected to be the one paying for the 'date', but A was a gentleboy, insisting on paying for the show and the dinner thereafter.

My first impression of A was that he looked much younger than his actual age. Although he was tall, towering over me easily at 190cm, tanned and good looking in a boyish way, he had long floppy hair that he kept flicking regularly, a habit I found irksome and which I see often when I watch Singapore Idol contestant Paul Twohill. I remember my first few sarcastic words to A after a couple of hair-flicking and hair-tossing "Can't you afford to cut your hair?" in which he immediately replied with a winsome smile "No, but then I'm too young to grow hair elsewhere". I stared disbelievingly, and then burst out laughing at his absurdity. He joined me laughing and took my hand boldly.

I let him hold my hand and lead me to the cinema. We were early and he had already book the tickets, so we ended up loitering around that area, eating popcorn and drinking soda. It was fun being with someone that age, talking about adolescent matters which brought back sweet memories of my schooling years. By the time the seating lights flashed through the LED display, we had already consumed half the bucket full of popcorn and I had forgotten my initial itch to grab a pair of scissors and snip off a lock of his hair. I cant really recall what movie we watched that day but it was a fun date. He did not let go of my hand throughout the show and he did not make his move even when the lights went off and we were seated so close together in the dark that I could actually sense the warmth from his body.

After the show, we went for dinner at KFC, and when he bit into the drumstick of his Hot n Spicy, oil spurted out from his chicken onto my face just as I was bending down. I shrieked and he laughed, grabbing a soiled napkin and dabbing at my cheek, spreading grease on my face. I retaliated by squirting Coke from my straw on him. Both of us were reduced to giggles and I admit he brought out the childish side in me which I had long forgotten. I enjoyed his company and the way he made me feel young and carefree, and I suppose that was why when he asked me out again, I agreed.

Sorry, I've got to rush for a wedding dinner, will continue tomorrow.

[techienator]

thanks for sharing ur memories with us.. its nice to read abt happy memories.. do continue if u r willing to share more.. looking forward to read more..

[sg_boytoy]

Originally Posted by SiLLymE

One of my previous lovers is a young boy, lets call him A. He was only 16 yrs old at that time and I got to know him through friendster.

Hey SiLLyme, does J come before A or are they not alphabetically linked? Friendster started in 2002, so that can't be too far off...

You still watch Singapore Idol? You're younger than I imagined...

[Criminalz]

i realised the diff between guys sharing and girls is that...we guys just go str to the point..mainly the fuck part...girls will talk about everything else...and then a small fuck part..

not trying to dish you dun worry..infact thank you for sharing...

just that, a little difficult to mantain an erection reading your story...so its making my masturbation just that more challenging...

[sg_boytoy]

Originally Posted by darkice

The last part sounded so sad. You have my condolences. But everytime you fall, you eventually get up and make you a stronger person.

I cannot offer you anything only this virtual little hug

*hugs*

Condolences? Who died

I cannot offer you anything but this virtual little slap to the back of your head.

* slap to the back of your head *

[sg_boytoy]

Originally Posted by Criminalz

just that, a little difficult to mantain an erection reading your story...so its making my masturbation just that more challenging...

Don't masturbate to words lah bro, look at ang kong better, more shiok and satisfying, ha ha ha

[sg_boytoy]

Originally Posted by skypot

Wow...Bet u score A1 for your O level
Great FR bro!

After reading this tale and you call the writer a bro

You got O levels boh?

[sg_boytoy]

Originally Posted by SiLLymE

Certainly I was naïve from inexperience and youth but nobody would accuse me of being foolish and dull-witted.

I beg your pardon?

You wasted 10 years and lost your virginity to your first ex and you woke up to that in your mid-20s. Then you met J, who was your second lover, went out for a few months, had a couple of fucks and you're still naïve from inexperience and youth? What a massive transformation (in that couple of years) before you landed a 16-year-old whom you liken to a current Singapore Idol contestant. Is that in dog years or what do you use to measure time