Yes i do and for me its after the 2nd sexual encounter.
It has to be sex done before i lay my cards down with her.
And best is after 2nd. Which means at the very least, both of us are okay with the sexual index so to speak.
Also after the 2nd one, its time to decide if this is a short term or long term based on the expectations of both parties so far.
I will reiterate that i am happily married.
And i just want to have fun outside of my marriage.
I feel like this sex fling between us is what i want and i want to be in this with her as long as she wants it.
Then we move on to your own pet peeves but bring this up slowly as u go.
Dont have to be upfront. List your critical pet peeves or triggers up front first.
Like make it clear u are happily married and only looking for fun outside of it.
For me, i made it clear that at any moment if she is not comfortable with the relationship, just leave and drop me a text.
No explanation required.
However having said all these, the content and the approach on this 'talk' is still very dependent on her maturity and not just age.
I find it super easy discussing such with a married/divorced woman in the late 30's and beyond.
Thanks. This is legitimate good advise for me, as am currently facing 1 which I'm trying to proceed with 1st encounter. She been hinting, but I have a feeling she have too much feelssssssss that I cant handle.
Thanks. This is legitimate good advise for me, as am currently facing 1 which I'm trying to proceed with 1st encounter. She been hinting, but I have a feeling she have too much feelssssssss that I cant handle.
Okay i understand the feels part.
This does not applies to all but i make it a point to repeat this to the younger girls.
I would tell them more than twice at the beginning.
I like who u are, the u right now, This u.
U dont have to pretend to be someone else.
And like u, this is the real me that i am showing u.
I will listen to u if u want to talk about your problems if i am available.
I will help u solve your problem if i am available and within my means.
But do remember my relationship status to u is an ordinary friend.
Do not treat me as your best chance and hope, i am not that capable.
And the same goes to me. I will not ask u for any help or listen to my problem.
I only want to have fun and pleasure when we are together.
I will handle my own shit.
After u said all this, watch how she takes it and its also a direct measure of her maturity and what kind of mindset she brings into this.
It might be blunt but i think for a clandestine relationship that has a very high possibility of self-detonation, better be blunt, truthful and outright clear at the get go.
For me, if the woman is offended, fine with me.
My criteria are my fling filters that ensure the quality of my fuckship.
This does not applies to all but i make it a point to repeat this to the younger girls.
I would tell them more than twice at the beginning.
I like who u are, the u right now, This u.
U dont have to pretend to be someone else.
And like u, this is the real me that i am showing u.
I will listen to u if u want to talk about your problems if i am available.
I will help u solve your problem if i am available and within my means.
But do remember my relationship status to u is an ordinary friend.
Do not treat me as your best chance and hope, i am not that capable.
And the same goes to me. I will not ask u for any help or listen to my problem.
I only want to have fun and pleasure when we are together.
I will handle my own shit.
After u said all this, watch how she takes it and its also a direct measure of her maturity and what kind of mindset she brings into this.
It might be blunt but i think for a clandestine relationship that has a very high possibility of self-detonation, better be blunt, truthful and outright clear at the get go.
For me, if the woman is offended, fine with me.
My criteria are my fling filters that ensure the quality of my fuckship.
solid. I steal and use (with abit of tweak) next time i meet her
will share here if happen to onboard new recruits.
After u said all this, watch how she takes it and its also a direct measure of her maturity and what kind of mindset she brings into this.
It might be blunt but i think for a clandestine relationship that has a very high possibility of self-detonation, better be blunt, truthful and outright clear at the get go.
A few married women in their 30s/40s that I chatted with said they wanted to find love outside. Only after have love then they will think about sex with the guys.
A few married women in their 30s/40s that I chatted with said they wanted to find love outside. Only after have love then they will think about sex with the guys.
What do u guys think of this kind of mindset?
Avoid them? Educate them?
All woman will always say love then think about sex so they dont seem so promiscuous. But if you press the right buttons and say the right things, you will always manage to get the sex even if theres no love.
A few married women in their 30s/40s that I chatted with said they wanted to find love outside. Only after have love then they will think about sex with the guys.
you are already one step closer with that conversation~!
A few married women in their 30s/40s that I chatted with said they wanted to find love outside. Only after have love then they will think about sex with the guys.
What do u guys think of this kind of mindset?
Avoid them? Educate them?
Just like the earlier two comments, u are already in a better position to play with them.
Good news for u is that they tell u upfront their requirements.
Which means they are game as long as u know what u are not getting before getting it. Understand?
And of course they want love first.
No decent or sane women would say, "ok lets fuck first and talk later".
There are some but they are fucking epic trouble, trust me.
This is a good and clear mindset at the start.
And i can guarantee u is that over a few sessions later, mindset changes due to what u can offer them.
So keep that in mind.
Lastly, dont ever educate them.
They are there to educate u. Learn from them.
Learn what? Learn why they want another man.
Learn what their man did wrong or not do.
Basically learn what causes them to welcome your rod into theirs.
Then use that insight to strengthen your own relationship with your woman and other women
In no time, your own relationship benefits.
Your alternate sexual relationships benefits.
Everyone benefits. Dont educate them on the mindset.
Learn from them but u can educate them on bed-set instead
All woman will always say love then think about sex so they dont seem so promiscuous. But if you press the right buttons and say the right things, you will always manage to get the sex even if theres no love.
usually this kind of married lady, what would the right stuffs to say to avoid being creepy?
Just like the earlier two comments, u are already in a better position to play with them.
Good news for u is that they tell u upfront their requirements.
Which means they are game as long as u know what u are not getting before getting it. Understand?
And of course they want love first.
No decent or sane women would say, "ok lets fuck first and talk later".
There are some but they are fucking epic trouble, trust me.
This is a good and clear mindset at the start.
And i can guarantee u is that over a few sessions later, mindset changes due to what u can offer them.
So keep that in mind.
Lastly, dont ever educate them.
They are there to educate u. Learn from them.
Learn what? Learn why they want another man.
Learn what their man did wrong or not do.
Basically learn what causes them to welcome your rod into theirs.
Then use that insight to strengthen your own relationship with your woman and other women
In no time, your own relationship benefits.
Your alternate sexual relationships benefits.
Everyone benefits. Dont educate them on the mindset.
Learn from them but u can educate them on bed-set instead
great insight on the let them educate u.. able to explain more on "not getting before getting it"?
Just like the earlier two comments, u are already in a better position to play with them.
Good news for u is that they tell u upfront their requirements.
Which means they are game as long as u know what u are not getting before getting it. Understand?
And of course they want love first.
No decent or sane women would say, "ok lets fuck first and talk later".
There are some but they are fucking epic trouble, trust me.
This is a good and clear mindset at the start.
And i can guarantee u is that over a few sessions later, mindset changes due to what u can offer them.
So keep that in mind.
Lastly, dont ever educate them.
They are there to educate u. Learn from them.
Learn what? Learn why they want another man.
Learn what their man did wrong or not do.
Basically learn what causes them to welcome your rod into theirs.
Then use that insight to strengthen your own relationship with your woman and other women
In no time, your own relationship benefits.
Your alternate sexual relationships benefits.
Everyone benefits. Dont educate them on the mindset.
Learn from them but u can educate them on bed-set instead
Earlier you wrote "I always advocate, fuck their pussies but not their hearts."
I think I am still confused about how to approach these women. With them, do we tell them we are interested to have love with them, or how do we talk to them without playing with their hearts?
Earlier you wrote "I always advocate, fuck their pussies but not their hearts."
I think I am still confused about how to approach these women. With them, do we tell them we are interested to have love with them, or how do we talk to them without playing with their hearts?
Thanks TS and other bro for the advice/comments.
Tell them what u really feel is the best.
My younger days, when i was single, young dumb and full of cum, i said whatever the girls wanted to hear so i can cum in her.
Now that is a fatal move if we are to use it on OPP and specifically OPP.
I can get away with single women or divorcees with that.
But with OPP or married or attached women, that is asking to be fucked by my own act.
In essence, we have to follow through, follow up and man up to the spoken feelings we said to the other party.
All i am saying, dont write cheques with your mouth when u are not able to cash it with your actions later.
U have feelings for her, good. I too.
U want to help her, give her refuge, be there for her, guide her and be always available for her?
I cant. Maybe u can, good for u.
Pound her pussy, dont pound her heart.
Be fair to her. Only give her what u can afford to.
Dont give her hope when u know u cant follow through later.
great insight on the let them educate u.. able to explain more on "not getting before getting it"?
They wont let u have what u want from them until u get (understand and agree) them. The upfront rules or caveat
For example.
I encounter this type of married women often when they want to snack.
Upfront they will explained to me that they like the current situation we are in.
They usually say it is friendly, vibey and a bit flirty.
They like it.
Then they asked this. "So will this be exclusive and discreet?"
Here they are not asking already.
They make it sound like a question but they are hinting u that if u want to fuck them, it has be only with them and discreet.
Last edited by UncleHasBeen; 18-09-2023 at 09:04 AM.
Reason: typo