How long did you not have sex with your wife or gf?

[seedofcucky]

Originally Posted by klzombie

Hi all bros and sis!


Seriously, its a very big and risky decision to me! haha!! But I have had enough thoughts to it. I know sex is going to be like... hard... ;p But I don't think its something impossible... If its max once a week, then so be it lor... I read mscucky's comments and I believe that I have to be like seriously damn more creative in making love. Its going to cost more and put a dent in income, as to buy more gifts, more holidays etc... but I guess it will contribute to the marriage and thats most important... yeah I've got car loans, house loans, insurance, and a whole lot of bills to pay but hell... sex with wife is important haha!!

So.... wish me luck

I didn't know my hotwife has just turned into a hot-counsellor. But anyhow, I wish you the best of luck.

[5ag1_Boar]

Originally Posted by klzombie

bro sagiboar,

physical invitation cannot la less my 2 FRs accidentally became public knowledge if some SBF bro got one drink too many haha!!

I can hold an online wedding here in SBF (minus my wife who will be replaced by another fellow SBF if possible haha!) heeheehee...

Ehhh... how about a SBF bachelor's party. Tell your fiancee business trip to Sg.

[dionysusex]

Originally Posted by Frankiestine

Woooh bro you hit the nail on the head with that....that just exactly how i felt and we even had a few fights becos of this...

Yo bro,

Few fights is an understatement, man. Honestly, I never thought I'd end up with this problem. When it surfaced, I tried talking, I tried argueing, I tried quarrelling. To no avail.

Ultimately, it always boiled down to one reason/excuse or another being headache, mind on work, stomachache, no mood, watch TV, too tired, etc etc. What I don't understand is, she is refusing even to give me a chance or give us a chance to get into the mood with teasings, flirts, etc. Outright no, shut down, shut off, game over even before anything can start. Like that where will ever have mood?

There were periods when we didn't talk to each other for more than a month. Imagine everyday live in the same house sleep on the same bed have meals on the same table but no conversation. It is worse than being with a stranger coz a stranger is no more than a stranger to you while this is someone you love and have emotional attachment to.

Contrary to what some may think, (or some people would view it as a reinforcement) I believe this is part of love and marriage and not plain lust. That is why I am refraining from eating outside.

So now, my only real temptation is loving via my hand (eat outside remains NOT an option. Period). Other times, I try to rediscover my love of reading, exhaust myself with exercise or simply attempt to meditate. So, if any bros or sises out there can recommend something else useful (and have my sincere gratitude), I can only resign myself to this fate.

P/S: Now thinking whether or not to have children but family duty ... hard to disregard

[ken_v2]

Originally Posted by mirkhanus

For me, someone whos been married for 13 years, the longest I've been without sex is 4 months. Had a huge tiff about 5 years back..... But later, we were banging like rabbits!!!

Nowadays, longest is 3 weeks....

well done brudder!! i married less than 3 years and is like once every 3 - months. both too tired from work.

dunno why but i find this thread is a wonderful read... thanks to everyone for their honest input. at least i feel 3 - 4 months isn't that abnormal.

[sgsnipe]

Originally Posted by ken_v2

well done brudder!! i married less than 3 years and is like once every 3 - months. both too tired from work.

dunno why but i find this thread is a wonderful read... thanks to everyone for their honest input. at least i feel 3 - 4 months isn't that abnormal.

Was so bored and reading this thread in hcmc. Just that some bros have the same sentiments as me. I am married with a kid for 3 years.

Same sentiments. Before marriage was like sex almost everyday. Always in hotel or her room. After marriage the number of sex cut to 2-3 times a week. After we had a kid, sex dropped from per week to twice a month to once a month, as we became more and more tired, kid, work. Settled for using my hand after my wife and kid sleep. This before I am outstationed.

I stopped cheonging when I was together with my wife - before our marriage and ever since. I thought I could stop cheonging forever. Resisted during my first trip. But the boredom and sex drive kicked in - little bro thinking for big bro. Was cheonging on and off now. May revert back to hand very soon.

For ppl who cheong for more than 10 years will know. It is just a vicous cycle. In SG, you will cheong GL40, GL150,FL,KTV,go JB, go batam. Thai,Indon,Viet,China,Angmo,Malaysian,Locals. Once you got bored with 1, you will change. When the cycle finished, you stopped and rest. When you get rested, you start the cycle again.

Nowadays I only have sex with my wife once a month or once in 2 months. As I am travelling most of the time. So hand and eating outside are the only option. Travelling is a real temptation. Just a reminder, eat and wipe clean, and alway be SAFE.

Originally Posted by sagiboar

Ehhh... how about a SBF bachelor's party. Tell your fiancee business trip to Sg.

Too late la bro, wedding seriously near liao, perhaps a post wedding party yaahaha!! But then cheonging is out of the question then haha!!

[surfer888]

Originally Posted by sgsnipe

Travelling is a real temptation. Just a reminder, eat and wipe clean, and alway be SAFE.

Yes, travelling makes cheonging a real temptation... but I actually cut down alot on cheonging after travelling a bit. Largely due to safety, hygiene and money. Commercial sex in some countries can really be seedy and extremely unhygenic... as for the perceived "cleaner" countries, it can be extremely expensive. Also cheonging alone sometimes can get pretty boring.

[5ag1_Boar]

Heh... reminds me that I lost of virginity to an ang-mo pros. Then was studying in Melbourne and they are legalised similar to Sg. My other foreign country cheong was a biz trip to Vancouver... bloody expensive! But then I dare not try the street walkers although I found one damn chio one near my hotel during my roaming. She looked like a druggy and I was worried about STDs. Eventually ended up at an upscale "health centre"... which was really expensive.

[surfer888]

Originally Posted by sagiboar

Eventually ended up at an upscale "health centre"... which was really expensive.

Wise choice. Better to pay with money than health. That's why I'm only looking rub n tugs these days.

Safer places to have commercial sex would be Oz and SG where at least it is legalized and there are mandatory health checks. But having said that, it is still not a guarantee... rub n tugs and DIY 100% safe.

Another safe option would be the wife... but then again, its been 5 years already and no desire for her anyway. May not be that safe also... if I can "cheong" behind her back, she could be doing it too!

[cancum]

So many bros write alrendi . My turn also lah . My real life is like that one : ........ before marry to my wife we made love like 4 to 5 time a week in my house .

Then i marry we stay own house can everyday made
love, but only for 4 month then doctor say got baby . The " me see '' then got tell me cannot made love if not afterward baby come out , the head got many sperm very hard to wash . So never made love until baby come out .

Then after that , downhill all the way . 1 week , 2 week , 1 month , 2 month ....... lost count . I think maybe she tired so i also like some bros here help to clean floor , wash spoon , bowl , pot, toilet ........ very helpful one . Think like that got chance to made love in the night but CB , cannot also . say i touch her neh neh n then the CB is to made love only . Never grab her tight or sleep close close .

Then i sleep close close n grab tight tight , CB , she say like that very hot don't sleep too close . I got aircon also what . Like cannot , like that also cannot . CCB . At last , she got give me made love but say she not enjoy like last time like she got play her small meat near the CB n then later she shake fast fast n then ask me also ram her hard hard also . sometime got bite me also . Now no more like that lah .

So , now a days , i have to pcc and then so many time pcc alrendi i think pcc better then to made love to her . I also got go TN , FL , HC , Geyland , KS to come out my sprem ......................but still the best with my wife , no need to spend many money . Just have to accept the life i choose one lor .



Many of us sailing in the same HARD-SHIP .
Saving up to complete the family WISH .
Then marry and fell into DEEP SHIT .
Not realizing we got the wrong BITCH .

[jemz]

Originally Posted by mscucky

Jemz.. do u agree with me? I think u n me hv similar drive… I m vain n I hv hsd. But I m not loose! i just know how to enjoy sex in a very healthy way….


Sorry if whatever I commented here make no sense to u. it’s just my two cents worth…

Hv a nice day

TOTALLY!

maybe i'm not as charged up as u la. but i definitely wont mind more than the usual. is that considered hsd?

yeah maybe the men here dont make more effort in romancing the wives after years of marriage. the complacency of "she'll always be around what" kinda mindset will turn any lady off. even after marriage, ladies need to be coaxed and cajoled. we love to be loved. why we always mention our courtship days is because you're hell not doing the things you used to. like my hubby, last time all sweet talk and lovey. now? i ask him why he no longer do that coz i like it and miss it... so direct already den he just go "LALALALAA...THERE YOU GO AGAIN! ALWAYS THINK SO MUCH!" i just give him the "haix..." den keep quiet. if he dont put in the effort, sometimes i also feel that i try so hard also no point.

if you keep your lady waiting, she must just find other ways lor. like me... end up, i think now my vibe more precious than him.

[jemz]

Originally Posted by dionysusex

Got any bros (or sis) can advise a constructive method to help me curb my sexual needs without the option of eat outside? I love my wife. I don't want to be unfaithful to her. I believe she loves me too but somehow the spark for sexual intimacy is not there. Thus, I would rather I learn to curb my urges to resolve this issue than incessantly quarrel with her or resorting to eating outside.

Thanks!

no la..as much as i dare say... it's just you know..figure of speech. i wont eat outside also la. not nice. altho many things happened, the sex is like minimal, i still love him to bits.

u got try aroma therapy? or u just go down on her lor. i normally do that to my hubby. or else we out of action for a week. he do work do work den after that just going to nod off. i pretend play flash game until he 3/4 zzz..just go and give him BJ until he bth lo. if you try your old old old tricks from wayyyy back, surprise her with what she likes, maybe can get some action.

and i suggest, take the damned tv and dvd player out of the room. better still, when you're having a fight, smash the whole damn thing altogether. u got a good excuse for spoiling it mah. say you need to vent your anger. until the day when she replaces the set, no distractions in the bedroom.

what i really like is also to set the mood. put those really nice candles in the bathroom and light a vanilla scent in the room. a soft glow and nice smell really sets the mood right. (i remember the last time lightbulb blew in the bathroom so had to shower with candles until next day before we get it replaced so i drag him inside and... well..you know what happened...)

maybe after the years passed, her taste changed? slowly rediscover?
i think u can try one day she lying on the bed u ask her not to move la. go buy whip cream standby. just give some lame excuse say you want to show her something. den just whip out the whipcream, squirt on her and lick it off. buy those low fat one. LOL! should set her off... the cold cream and the licking can kill liao.

[BustLover]

Originally Posted by jemz

...
yeah maybe the men here dont make more effort in romancing the wives after years of marriage. the complacency of "she'll always be around what" kinda mindset will turn any lady off. even after marriage, ladies need to be coaxed and cajoled. we love to be loved. why we always mention our courtship days is because you're hell not doing the things you used to. like my hubby, last time all sweet talk and lovey. now? i ask him why he no longer do that coz i like it and miss it... so direct already den he just go "LALALALAA...THERE YOU GO AGAIN! ALWAYS THINK SO MUCH!" i just give him the "haix..." den keep quiet. if he dont put in the effort, sometimes i also feel that i try so hard also no point.

if you keep your lady waiting, she must just find other ways lor. like me... end up, i think now my vibe more precious than him.

Wow,Sis Jemz! You have really hit on the head of the nail. You ladies are still yearning for those courtship days of romantic moments in a 2 people world. Unfortunately, we men are downright practical man that go straight to the point. This is why I think most marriage suffers when the expectations from both parties are so different.

One is living in yester-world while the other have to struggle for a living with an uncertain future. Physically, both parties may have changed so drastically that it is difficult for men to recall the good old days when the look and physics are not there.

[jemz]

Originally Posted by BustLover

Wow,Sis Jemz! You have really hit on the head of the nail. You ladies are still yearning for those courtship days of romantic moments in a 2 people world. Unfortunately, we men are downright practical man that go straight to the point. This is why I think most marriage suffers when the expectations from both parties are so different.

One is living in yester-world while the other have to struggle for a living with an uncertain future. Physically, both parties may have changed so drastically that it is difficult for men to recall the good old days when the look and physics are not there.

of coz we yearn for those days. u will still carry our bags, open the doors and let us in first. those little things shouldnt go away after marriage. when courting, u wanted sex, there it was. after marriage, even more so its there. but you get complacent thinking that it'll always be there and no longer make an effort. love is to be nurtured and developed. not demanded. marriage suffers when men think it's no longer necessary to be like before. practicality takes over but to maintain that healthy relationship between two persons, both must make the effort. it's not about living right now or yester-year. it's an ongoing thing to make it last.

romantic moments should not simply be erased after years of marriage. it should even more so be there to spice up a relationship that's gone routine and dull.

[primalhunter]

Sis Jemz,
Good to hear u would initiate sex( give ur hubby a BJ while he is half asleep). the thing is, most of us have wifes who are not, well fire starters! (except when it comes to arguments) My bor just spread eagle and wait for me to finish.... then ask, cum aledi ah? quick quick, tissue, dun dirty the bedsheet!! nah beh, like dat i might as well pcc.... which is wat i prefer now. outsourcing not an option... given that up entirely.....

I have now gone 2 months without touching her, bcos feel really unwanted each time it is me to initiate..... feels like she can do without me! so i lan lan no tiow la..... best part is she think i am nuts. says marry liow like dat la... she say most of her frens oso like dat.... knn, i now fcuk her fren har? dun even talk about BJ cos now she say its dirty. wah lau, bfore marriage, my dick not dirty har.... wat happen during marriage dat suddenly soiled my dick!!!

look, all i want is that cheeky ger i knew who bohsia bohsia pull down me shorts n suck soon as i reach home.... n would tell me where she wants me to lick..... bros here know wat i mean. somehow, this marriage thingy not wat iis all hyped up to be!!

yes, we have a kid now but we only see him in the weekends.... so cannot say tired bcos of childcare. wat the fcuk? or should i say, where the fcuk?