Pubs along Joo Chiat

[lament]

Marriage in the Air

This past week have been rather scary, one of my gal call me from Vietnam and ask for my hand, this is follow up by my gal still in Singapore. Just last night, I got bombarded with another request. My excuse being that I am not able to provide them any support and so I will not agree. If I do want, I have to ensure that they are clean from whatever past trade they are in. Its not that I mind what they do for a living, I don’t really bother.

It also seems like recently many gals from Viet zone is bringing up the topic of marriage to their loved ones. Giving the recent spate of events, this is fast becoming popular once again. Many understand the safety net offered by having a Singapore husband. They are many real marriages but also many scams as reported in the papers.

For the naïve ones whom just their journey into this zone, I like to give my 2-cents worth of advise. To many, marriage means a union of 2 people out of love. With a Viets, it means a union with her and her family

Taking a leaf of a friend of mine whom just got married in Vietnam, his wife is not those whom works in any of the night life joint. Prior to his marriage to this gal, he was with another gal.

For her, he sacrifices his marriage in Singapore and moved to Vietnam to work. Plans of marriage were in place the moment he gets his divorce approved. Things are rosy and fine till her family falls into bad times. He did his best to support her and her family. He even invested in a small café so that the family could earn their own keep. But then they are lazy and simply ask him for help. To him, her own immediate family asking for help is a small matter.

Then the relatives started asking for help too, her family pressured her to ask him to help her uncles and aunties. Being filial which is what most Vietnamese are towards their family. She ask and he helps but then the asking never stops. Hence they quarrel often and thus broke up.

Remember this always. To a Vietnamese, their immediate family always rank high in their priority followed by the siblings of their parents. Friends are next in the list and husband often rank last.

Many a times, the gals here in Singapore are here for a reason and that is to help their own family back home. They pamper the family with most often or not, bulk of the money that they earned. An understanding family will spend wisely but Vietnamese are known gamblers and many parents often squander such wealth on gambling.

I remember a gal whom send half her earnings to her mum whom squander it all in gambling and incur additional debts which even her half have to be contributed and is insufficient. She thus have to return to work to pay off the debts and interest rates from illegal money lenders in Vietnam are very high up to as much as 50%. Unlike Singapore, the police are corrupted and thus do not bother.

I am not against marriages but then before one take that plunge and prepares for marriage. Think rationally and the real reason of it all. The cultural difference of our countries takes time too comprehend. It took me almost 2 years to learn their culture and ways.

[lament]

Inside the mind of a Vietnamese Gal

Viets gals are by nature
a. Submissive
b. Loyal
c. Tends to show concern rather than shower love
d. Gets Jealous easily
e. Short Fuse
f. Give their all when they like someone

A real viet gal in Vietnam due to the fact that they have no place in society though modern in outlook are still bounded by their traditional mindset:

1. Man do not like woman to sweet-talk. Hence the gals show concern by actions and simple words and not words of love.

Examples of words of concern:
Have you eaten? Where are you? What are you doing?

2. A man will not make love with a gal he love till marriage except those he wants to have fun. Just like in the past, we guys want a virgin for a wife. Hence if a man do not touch her, she will think he love her much.
Recounting the story of my ex-viet gf whom was 16 when I knew her, though she work in 51 and is bonk by man, I have never touch her. I remember on the 3rd month, she ask why I never touch her, I replied I dun like …. Bullshit I wish I could but u are too young for me. Anyway, the words soon spread throughout 51 that I never touch her and love her true ……. She became my officially recognized gf in 51 …..

3. Relationship priority, coming from a traditional background usually. Family ranks high followed by relatives and friends. Try asking your viet gal to see your family, they usually rejects as in Vietnam when seeing the parents, it is consider that you are going to marriage. Boyfriend is always last priority. So if in Singapore, ally with their so-call sister, make her your best friend and you are in control of the relationship.

[lament]

Phases of Vietnamisation

Initiation Phase: last a few days
1. initiate contact by either sit with them or talk to them
2. See them and talk to them to obtain rapport

Honeymoon Phase: last between 1 to 3 flights.
1.start of courtship and if can click, this will be the most entertaining part of the whole relationship
2.you will feel the full weight of their love
3.no money just pure lovey dovey feeling
4.depending on actions done during this phase, it will determine the next two phases

Reality Phase: no time limit
1.motive behind relationship not due to love
a.start of request for monetary help with excuses such as tired of this working life, not enough customer, family sick and a whole list of demands or.
b.start of request for marriage but allow to continue work to finance family else hubby help out

2.by acceding to demands, relationship continues

Isolation Phase: no time limit
1.motive behind relationship due to love for you
a.do not want you to see her working
b.do not like you to associate with other gals

2.Will give you her time when she is not working such as off-duty hours or no customer

3.the real Vietnamese woman view of love, no words of love but concern

4.test of patience phase but endurance is key to lasting relationship.

[lament]

Side Effects of an improperly administered Vietnamisation program

This is written in jest but is the essence of the effects when one suffers from a poor Vietnamisation bout ..... Read and take heed of the warning signals here ......

The above are some of the common syndromes found in an improperly administer vietnmisation program

1. Loss of Money due to:
a. pity her - stop work, family, etc
b. satisfying the need to communciate - hp, idd calls, phone cards
c. need to see her - air-tickets, taxi, beer, etc
d. satisfying her food craving- crabs, seafood, etc

2. Loss of Appettide due to:
a. symptom 1 - credit card bills, loans
b. sym. 2

3. Loss of Sleep
a. sym. 1 - credit card bills, loans
b. sym. 2

4. Becoming a Robert
a. more intense manifestation of sym.

5. False Illusion of being in Love
a. 1st 3 months - feeling of intense love
b. 2nd 3 months - feeling of love but peg with demands
i. demand met - feelings of love
ii.demands not met - feelings of unlove

6. Loss of Friends
a. sym. 5
i. spend too much time on gal
ii. piss friends off due to ignoring their advice
b. dissociation by friends due to (a) above
c. light-ear
i. listen to "good advice" from gal - this happens if u r known to be my
friend

7. Loss of Time
a. sym. 5

8. Loss of any other form of enjoyment
a. sym. 5
b. sym. 7

9. Marriage
a. being conned to a scam marriage whilst she has hubby and kids in
Vietnam
b. being conned to a scam marriage and have an immediate family "Buy 1
get few free"
c. to help her get license to stay in Sillypore officially

10. Deterioration of body functions:
a. hearing
b. Lung related ailments
c. Liver related ailments
d. Kidney related ailments
e. STD

11. Physical Injuries due to:
a. Smash by beer mug:
i. fighting for same gal
ii. dun pay for services
iii. caught flirting with other gal
iv. standing up for your gal
v. caught by your spouse or real life sillypore gal
b. Scratch Marks:
i. passionate moments
ii. fighting with your gal
c. Love Bites:
i. passionate moments
d. Red Face:
i. slap by your gal
e. Blue Black:
i. pinched by your gal

[lament]

[b]Vietnamese Love Letter[/b

This is a letter that i send to 1 of my gf in vietnam ...... for those who know her ... she is Michelle .... hope it help u guys improve or pick up pointers .

tons of emotional roller coasters and design to go for the jugular in the woman ............cheers ..............

Em oi,
day la email cua anh. Khi em doc thu cua anh, anh da di VN. Hoi qua em noi khoang Ngay15 em ve Saigon. Con xa lam, 1nguoi o bac va 1 nguoi o nam. Khong chac khi nao anh se gap duoc em, hy vong em khong bat anh phai cho lau.

This is my email. By the time you read my mail, I have left for vietnam. You say you be leaving on the 15th. Near yet far apart, 1 in the north and the other in the south. Not sure when I will see you again, hope you don't make me wait too long.

Anh khong biet dung loi noi ra sao de dien ta het tinh cam cua minh. Lan dau tien gap em, anh khong hieu sao anh lai rat muon duoc lam quen voi em. Em co biet tai sao anh l i noi voi em rang chung ta nen tim hieu nhau lau hon khong, vi anh khong muon chung minh gay ton thuong cho nhau, anh chi muon noi mot lan duy nhat rang chung ta sinh ra la de cho nhau. Anh rat co cam giac voi em nhung anh chi co the noi anh thich em. Neu anh noi anh yeu em thi anh chi noi doi vi chung ta chi quen biet nhau moi day thoi.

I do not know how to put my feelings into words. When I first see u, not sure why, i know i want to make friends with you. You know why i say i want us to know each other slowly because I do not want us to hurt each other and only time will tell that we are meant for each other. I do have strong feelings for you but I can say I like you much. If I say I love you, I will be lying as we know each other recently.

Anh biet em dang rat can tien, em den Singapore vi em muon kiem tien chu khong phai tim nguoi yeu. Anh khong phai la ke ngoc dau em a, anh biet em dang lam gi o Singapore. Va khi anh quyet dinh den voi em thi anh biet anh se gap tro ngai gi khi quen voi em.

I know that u really need money, you are in singapore because you want to earn money and not to find a lover. I am not stupid, I know what you are doing in singapore. when i decide to choose you, i know what i am getting into when i know you.

Em biet do, ban gai truoc day cua anh lam o 51, co mot lan anh noi co ay ve xin me co ay cho phep hai nguoi lay nhau. Neu co ay khong bi canh sat bat giu thi co the gio day tui anh da dang chuan bi lam dam cuoi roi. Anh that su thich em vi chinh con nguoi that su cua em chu khong phai vi nhung viec em dang lam. Anh hy vong lan nay anh khong sai.

You have know my ex-girlfriend who work at 51, i have once ask her to ask her mum for permission to marry her. If she was not caught by the police, maybe we are preparing for marriage. I really like you for who you are and what you are working as. Hope that I am right this time.

Dung de so phan dieu khien em va cung dung tu trach ban than ve nhung viec minh dang lam. Anh mong rang anh co the lam em thay doi tot hon. Anh khong dam hua nhung anh se co het suc.

Don't let fate control you and don't you despise yourself for what you are doing. Hope I can one day help you change for the better. No promise but I will try.

Thoi gian o ben em tuy ngan ngui nhung da mang lai cho anh nhieu niem hanh phuc. Da lau lam roi anh khong co cai cam giac cua su vui suong do. Chi can trong thay em la anh cung cam thay du vui roi.

The time that i have spend with though short have brought me many joys. For a long time, I have not had such feelings of joy. Just seeing you is enough to make me feel good.

Cam on em da danh thoi gian cho anh. Chao em. Hay viet thu cho anh khi em ranh roi nhe.

Thanks for giving me your time and concern. Take Care. Do write to me when you have the time.

[lament]

Tips for courting a Viet Gal

The right use of words are a key and also a deep understanding of their culture. This is what I use and are done in Vietnamese not English and is more effective in that approach

Setting the ground rules when contact initated
- this is where the initation comes in and I set the ground rules of the way the game is to be played.
- This is also done as a filtering process to filter away undesirable elements

F: Can I sit with you?
M: No, I am scared of Vietnamese gals.
F: Why?
M: (Jokingly) Afraid that they break my heart?
F: How come?
M: Cos they have a sweet tongue
F: Really !!!
M: What do you think !!! they will say “I love you” and “I miss you” which are all lies. Right?
F: Right.
M: When a woman love a man, she will say “what are you doing” and “have you eaten” and that’s a real Vietnamese woman. Correct?
F: Correct and you seem to know us well. You have a Vietnamese wife.
M: Nope, never got married and still single cos ugly and fat. But I have an ex-gf of over 1 year plus who used to work in this region and that’s why I know.
F: Liar, you still single.
M: Yup, would you like to be my gf. (show her an inviting palm while joking)
F: Can (just to continue the joke with you only no serious implication at this stage)

With all this, the gal will have to change their game plan or target cos their standard gameplan will never work anymore…..

Meeting the one that you like
- Getting the engine running
-
M: I really like to make friend with you and not be a customer and as you know I never like to sit with any ger.
F: Why me?
M: Because I like you and like to know you more. If I say I love you, I would be lying. Well after we get to know each other and we both feel the same way.
F: And Then?
M: (jokingly) I will make a trip to meet up with your parents to tell them I want you to be my girlfriend.
F: (laughs) Not to be a wife meh.
M: Well, must let your parents know who I am first and after sometime, I will go and see them again to tell them that.
M: Well, go ahead and do whatmust let your parents know who I am first and after sometime, I will go and see them again to tell them that.
F: (laughs) Not to be a wife meh.

[lament]

Tips for Successful Vietnamisation
1. Never ever lie to her cause if she knows then you are in shit. Even if you already have a wife or girlfriend, tell her the truth. I thought that this was not possible initially but then 1 experiment with a blue area girl proved otherwise and since then I learnt to tell the truth and that’s how I can have open relationship with multiple gals in the same area.

2. Learn to wipe your mouth clean after makan. Viet gals love gossiping and words will spread far and wide. In the initial years, whatever I do to a gal is always outside of 51. That’s why I earn the reputation of not sitting with any gals and this reputation still sticks till today. Just the other night, I was with me ger in 51 and 1 of the gals say “2nite rare occasion, u sitting with a gal”

3. Be a Mr. Nice Guy, play soft when she throw temper. Never ever shout back and just keep quiet. When she done, just say you going off and just go home. The next day, she will be back to normal. Any shouting will lead to big quarrel.

4. Be Mr. Smiley face, just be friendly and give me a smile to everyone.

5. Time and persistency , this is the key to everything to grabbing a hold on the gal’s heart. I have often edge people out because of the time that I can afford and not the money.

6. Never humiliate her with money if she sleeps you for free but try to delay this process till she offers it.

7. The family and friend’s route. All gals have some close friends and a so-call relative whom they call elder sister. Find out who she is and be on good terms with this elder sister as 1 word from them is better than our 20 words.
If the sister likes you, she will help you do what we cannot do such as scolding our gf and will help you take your gal in hand and control.

8. Learn to have an open mind and let them do their work, they will give you time when they have the time. Once you meddle with their work, either pay her not to do so or she will want you out of her life. Let them make their own decision of whether to work or go out with you.
Remember, let them continue to fish and not give them the fish. By doing so, you are spoiling their means of survival into a dependency.

[lament]

VN Kopi Theory

Surviving vietnamisation requires the application of the VN Kopi Theory

let me illustrate this using VN traditional drip kopi. 2 enjoy a good cuppa, u got to wait till the coffee drip completely. The problem is that it sure take damn long to drip, kopi equivalent to a quarter of the standard kopi cup takes 5minutes or more. Sometimes if the drip not prepared properly, no kopi drip so got to change.

The morale of this story is that the gals are like VN kopi, it all takes time, so instead of waiting for 1 cup to finish driping, order many cups and wait to drink. Sometimes it gets cold, then either add hot water or throw away. Anyway a cup of drip kopi cost about S$0.30.

so enjoy urself n stiop getting embroidered into the so call love....cheers ...

[lament]

a repost for those whom have miss out on it ......hope this can help you all


Some essential guides to Vietnamisation:

Warning to those about to be involved with Vietnamese Woman

VN Kopi Theory

Inside the mind of a viet gal

Tips for courting a viet gal

Tips for Successful Vietnamisation

Phases of Vietnamisation
Marriage in the Air

Side Effects of an improperly administered Vietnamisation program

Vietnamese Love Letter

VN Dictionary

[lament]

Originally Posted by MoonBlaze

Dun really understand her rationale behind this whole thing. Just exercise caution.

i tell you i will be having so many wifes by now liao ... that will make my mum damn proud of me .....

[RJ2004]

dats all? no more chapters this year?
i really have fun reading heh heh

[MoonBlaze]

Originally Posted by RJ2004

dats all? no more chapters this year? i really have fun reading heh heh

Maybe that conclude's his compliation of volume ONE.
Maybe he will working in subsequent volume soon....hope to see some case studies. Kekeke...

[cheongking888]

Went down to Blue Star last night and was a ghost town. Only a couple of gals around. When I was there, 4 police cars came and the policemen went to the SSS KTV just beside Blue Lagoon. Then saw a man running out very fast out from the KTV. Dun noe wat happened. Think I will stop going to JC for quite a while.

[lament]

I believe i have quoted many examples but then i think i will start with some chapters on actual diagnosis of Vietnamisation Victims

took me 2 hours to pen the latest 2 additions sia ........

hope no offence to anyone cos written from my heart for my pals .......

[RJ2004]

hehehe... dun case study me can liao...
my pattern dun think anyone can follow
they will surely be bored to death