Originally Posted by warbird
Good morning!
Bro ahpui99 asked me "What will you recommend if not to treat then nicely?"
I replied that "no time to answer this topic fully. I know it is confusing to a lot of men n women..."
"Suffice to say that, if you're a dominant man w/ great emotional strength/self mastery, and you believe in your subconscious mind, that u hv higher sexual n social value, then you can treat any girls nicely n sometimes not so nicely...they will still be very attracted to u."
You don't need to be a jerk or "bad boy" to be very successful w/ women. The secret is to be a gentleman w/ the POSITIVE traits of a "bad boy" sans his NEGATIVE traits. By being THE MAN w/ dominance, masculine confidence, sexual mojo n emotional strength/self mastery. You're the grand prize. The prettiest n highest quality women will flock to you. No "bad boy" can ever hope to compete w/ u.
When I started BY-ing girls over 5 1/2 yrs ago, I was an apparent "nice guy" in many ways, but not completely, as I could be very sexual n tough in some areas. How could I be a "nice guy" when I would ask every girl of my type, after meeting for a few minutes, 做爱多少钱？ 多少都不行？ 那我包养你. I was really a closet jerk pretending to be a "nice guy" because I wrongly thought that girls would like me more. I hv been shedding the negative traits of both "jerk" n "good guy." It's in progress. 我是一个非常复杂的动物哈哈.
There hv been many books n articles written on why "nice guys" are such losers to women. I happened to read a few chapters on the subject this morning. It's written by a well known guru. I'll share some of the more important points here.
Simply put, women are REPELLED by “nice guys”.
When I say repelled, it MEAN it. I am NOT exaggerating.
It’s kind of a sad fact of life, but it’s ONE HUNDRED PERCENT TRUE. Women equate “nice-ness” with INFERIORITY.
Women are attracted to masculinity, which embodies strength and power. Being NICE is synonymous with HAVING NO POWER.
When you are nice, you send the message “I have no power” to a woman. Which means, to her, that you are giving all the power away, to her!
A “nice” example of a horrifying self-inflicted wound is when a man tells a woman he hardly knows that he loves her. This is NOT attractive, for she feels she has the power over such a man.
Women cannot feel attraction for men who need them, or for any man who exudes weakness in any form. “Niceness” is basically a kamikaze act, a suicide to your future with her.
Well, it is a fact. Women don’t like nice guys. Women don’t usually like abuse, and I’ll show you how to be successful without being a real jerk, but get this through your head one more time:
Women don’t only “not like” nice guys...
Women are REVOLTED by them.
But I assure you, it is good and natural to be more “bad” with women. Being “nice” makes women feel guilty and inhibited about sharing their “sinful” sexuality with a “nice” asexual guy like you.
“Nice” is fake. Masculine is real. Masculine is sexy.
Being nice is weak. It ensures you pander to women, in the hope maybe they will give you sex. It is repulsive.
Ironically, “nice guys” wonder as they complain, “I don’t know what happened. I was so NICE to her, I treated her so WELL. I was everything for her. I took her places, I bought her things, I LOVED her. I told her I loved her a thousand times. I never looked at other girls,” etc.
Yet it was actually this “niceness” itself that ruined everything!
“Bad Guys” used to be the only ones who knew this. They snickered to themselves as they watched nice guys get shot down by hot women who were bored to death of compliments and ass kissing. These women had no reservations about rejecting the nice guy for a bad guy and having sex with the bad guy on the very first night.
And of course, these women complained about the “jerk” that dumped them for another woman the very next day. And the “jerks” laughed even harder at this, because they knew she wouldn’t change a bit, and that she would fall for another jerk, again and again.
Well, no more.
I'm going to really stick it to the “Bad Guys” by teaching good guys every damn little secret that bad guys already know.
And you won’t even have to be a jerk. Think of it as my contribution for world justice.
There is another reason why being “nice” is such a calamity, and why being the dominant, alpha male, known as THE MAN, is so crucial.
Not only are women attracted to the sexy masculinity of THE MAN, but women are forced to be suspicious of whatever good feelings they can muster for a “nice” guy.
Sounds crazy? Not really. Here’s why: “Nice guys” unknowingly instill resistance in women by being so good.
When a guy is “NICE” to a woman, then even in the rare case where she may feel desire for him, she will interpret her desire as NOT BEING DESIRE. Rather, she will interpret her feeling as “debt”, or “guilt”.
She will think she is only feeling emotion because she owes the guy, or that she feels sorry for him. In other words, she will be convinced that she feels no real DESIRE.
Whereas, if a guy is a typical jerk, she thinks the guy’s very “jerkiness” is the proof of his sexiness.
After all, the jerk doesn’t even TRY to impress her, so he must be so sexy that he doesn’t need to try! She then feels no guilt, no debt, and no pity. And if she feels ANYTHING, then whatever she feels will be interpreted as RAW, UNADULTERATED, PURE DESIRE.
And the more he acts like a jerk, the more he reinforces her desire, through the following never-ending cycle of “chick” logic: She becomes convinced her desire is pure, that it is her who loves jerko, because it surely isn’t jerko who needs her! And if jerko is so “un-needy” that he can actually continue to be such a jerk, it must be because he is so desirable that he can get away with it.
This makes her desire for him even greater, and as she shows him this desire, he (as a jerk) makes sure to NEVER reciprocate, which makes him seem even sexier because most guys would kiss her ass at this point. She, of course, then desires him even more, and so on and so forth...
Do you get it? If not, read it again, it’s crucial.
This phenomenon is known as Cognitive Dissonance, first expounded by professor of psychology Leon Festinger in 1957. What it means is that humans seek inner harmony, also known as CONGRUENCY.
We don’t want resistance and conflicting ideas in our head. It doesn’t feel good. So we explain our behaviors, and feelings so they seem congruent. Cognitive Dissonance is very powerful stuff. A woman simply will not feel DESIRE for a man if she has reason to think it’s actually a feeling of debt or guilt.
(To Be Continued)
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