[Sweet Trip]

Hi all, I had been married for 10 years now and I am considering a divorce with my wife (yes it had been a constant topic between us in recent years). And yes again, the wife constantly taunts me to divorce her. I do not wish for this type of outcome considering that I have 3 beautiful daughters, aged 2, 5 and 8 and the the thought of them having a broken family pains me deeply. I have so many questions but do not know where to go for advice and consolation.

My monthly income is 17k and bonus can be as many as 6 months. How much is expected of me when it comes to monthly maintenance? Is bonus part of the calculation? I would prefer a lump sum payment. How much is expected?

Also, when it comes to the custody of the child, what are the chances of me having custody of the kids? What is taken into consideration? As most concerned parents, divorce is the greatest guilt on the parent in the form of the amount of damage done on the poor kids, therefore, I would think that naturally any divorcee would want custody of their kids to make up of the guilt for the failed marriages.

Also, I had contracted an incurable std (not fatal) unknowningly before marriage but had been faithful throughout the marriage. Not sure whether this has any implications but knowing my wife being the revengeful and hateful type would go out to the open and tell everyone which she already did to some.

Any advice out there? It would be good if there are divorced men out there who can share their experiences. It really is tormenting and certainly a life wrecker.

Thanks to all.