Confessions of a family man

[dadbod40]

I've been a closet follower of this forum for some time now. Reading/stalking the various posts with interest and sometimes envy. Decided to post this as a form of release/rant/reflection or whatever you call it.

You see, I've been married for more than 15 years and I have a successful career, a happy family and still enjoy regular sex with my wife. From the outside, most people would envy what I have. However, on the inside, I feel a certain emptiness... I miss the feeling of GFE, the chase, and perhaps even the thrill of making out in public places. I yearn for more than just sex, but also someone to have an intelligent conversation with, or to bounce a business idea off and cross check my thoughts and ending it off with some exhilarating sex. After all, what stimulates the most is the mind. :D

But... I guess there is too much to lose and too little to gain, not to mention finding someone suitable. I've tried paid dates from the popular sites but the conversations don't seem to stick. I must say some of them are pretty hot though. :D

Any guys share the same feelings?

P.S. I get the feel I might get zapped, after all this IS a sex forum...

[BushTracker]

I've been a closet follower of this forum for some time now. Reading/stalking the various posts with interest and sometimes envy. Decided to post this as a form of release/rant/reflection or whatever you call it.

You see, I've been married for more than 15 years and I have a successful career, a happy family and still enjoy regular sex with my wife. From the outside, most people would envy what I have. However, on the inside, I feel a certain emptiness... I miss the feeling of GFE, the chase, and perhaps even the thrill of making out in public places. I yearn for more than just sex, but also someone to have an intelligent conversation with, or to bounce a business idea off and cross check my thoughts and ending it off with some exhilarating sex. After all, what stimulates the most is the mind. :D

But... I guess there is too much to lose and too little to gain, not to mention finding someone suitable. I've tried paid dates from the popular sites but the conversations don't seem to stick. I must say some of them are pretty hot though. :D

Any guys share the same feelings?

P.S. I get the feel I might get zapped, after all this IS a sex forum...

I feel you man! At least you still have the regular sex.

[CheongingEdge]

Don't see why people will zap you for this.

Anyway I think it's pretty common, we are trained and conditioned to think that "society norms and laws" are what's normal. It makes sense from a governance point of view but it has the effect of ignoring individualism and we are all numbers in the grand scheme of things.

It's rare to find someone who meets all your desires. Brains, beauty, skills etc. Whether it's FB, ONS, paid service. How I do it is to separate things: If I need a wild time, I know where to go. Simulating and deep conversation? That's harder, but not impossible. So far, only managed to bed 2 ladies whom had the intellectual capacity that I am looking for, and both are ONS where we are mature enough to acknowledge that it's a one off NSA affair.

You sound like you are in a mid-life crisis and in a situation where most things are going your way and therefore you have the luxury to look at where you think is lacking. Count your blessings, and it's entire up to you on how you want to fulfil the gaps

[SerflySGR]

I've been a closet follower of this forum for some time now. Reading/stalking the various posts with interest and sometimes envy. Decided to post this as a form of release/rant/reflection or whatever you call it.

You see, I've been married for more than 15 years and I have a successful career, a happy family and still enjoy regular sex with my wife. From the outside, most people would envy what I have. However, on the inside, I feel a certain emptiness... I miss the feeling of GFE, the chase, and perhaps even the thrill of making out in public places. I yearn for more than just sex, but also someone to have an intelligent conversation with, or to bounce a business idea off and cross check my thoughts and ending it off with some exhilarating sex. After all, what stimulates the most is the mind. :D

But... I guess there is too much to lose and too little to gain, not to mention finding someone suitable. I've tried paid dates from the popular sites but the conversations don't seem to stick. I must say some of them are pretty hot though. :D

Any guys share the same feelings?

P.S. I get the feel I might get zapped, after all this IS a sex forum...

After many years of marriage, who doesn't crave for some excitement, Bro dadbod40?

I'm sure some people will zap you but not me because, like you say, this is a Sex Forum so who am I to judge?

Those hot little SYT - all too superficial? Plastic? Artificial?

[larue]

Tinder awaits your presence.

[UncleHasBeen]

I've been a closet follower of this forum for some time now. Reading/stalking the various posts with interest and sometimes envy. Decided to post this as a form of release/rant/reflection or whatever you call it.

You see, I've been married for more than 15 years and I have a successful career, a happy family and still enjoy regular sex with my wife. From the outside, most people would envy what I have. However, on the inside, I feel a certain emptiness... I miss the feeling of GFE, the chase, and perhaps even the thrill of making out in public places. I yearn for more than just sex, but also someone to have an intelligent conversation with, or to bounce a business idea off and cross check my thoughts and ending it off with some exhilarating sex. After all, what stimulates the most is the mind. :D

But... I guess there is too much to lose and too little to gain, not to mention finding someone suitable. I've tried paid dates from the popular sites but the conversations don't seem to stick. I must say some of them are pretty hot though. :D

Any guys share the same feelings?

P.S. I get the feel I might get zapped, after all this IS a sex forum...

Hey bro, I totally get u.
Let me share my experience on this with u.
Before i got married, i had about 8 relationships with married women.
These were mainly sexual ones with little emotional capital invested.
The point i want to highlight is this, those 8 married women felt the way u are feeling right now.
And u know what is the worse part? I was not their first and only extra-martial fuck buddy.
But i do get u bro. At the same time, u might want to take some time and do a check on your missus as well. At least make sure she does not share your sentiment.

Next, i am married for 17 years now. I do not have your 'inclinations'. But that does not place me on a higher moral ground looking down at u, no bro.
I have done more questionable shit than most of the average men in SG. I am not at your current 'stand-point' is because i have went through and experienced first hand those feelings that u have now.
Marriage is hard work and it will be until the last day.
My suggestion, it might seem naive or dumb given the forum and thread we are in. But is this, work with your missus. Slowly share your sentiment with her bit by bit.
I am telling u from experience again, the moment we share our innermost thoughts, doubts or lusts with our spouse, it strengthens the relationships.
Me and my old lady brought our sexual satisfaction to the next level when we open up about our fears and worries regarding marriage.
Not sure if any of the above would make any sense to u but i do hope that u put in a little more effort into your marriage.
It could be as simple as talking more candidly.
I said all these with the deepest respect, bro.

[HonkyTonkyMan]

Bro midlife crisis, been down that road, all I can say is you want something new, something exciting but end of the day even after you get it all, it all back to square one that i can say...

[driedlemon3]

I've been a closet follower of this forum for some time now. Reading/stalking the various posts with interest and sometimes envy. Decided to post this as a form of release/rant/reflection or whatever you call it.

You see, I've been married for more than 15 years and I have a successful career, a happy family and still enjoy regular sex with my wife. From the outside, most people would envy what I have. However, on the inside, I feel a certain emptiness... I miss the feeling of GFE, the chase, and perhaps even the thrill of making out in public places. I yearn for more than just sex, but also someone to have an intelligent conversation with, or to bounce a business idea off and cross check my thoughts and ending it off with some exhilarating sex. After all, what stimulates the most is the mind. :D

But... I guess there is too much to lose and too little to gain, not to mention finding someone suitable. I've tried paid dates from the popular sites but the conversations don't seem to stick. I must say some of them are pretty hot though. :D

Any guys share the same feelings?

P.S. I get the feel I might get zapped, after all this IS a sex forum...

Life is such, when you have a peqceful life it gets boring, when it's too much drama you want peace.
Its not uncommon to feel this way and it's not just man, woman can feel the same as well when sparks of love gets eroded with the changing dynamics with the arrival of kids, stress of work, office politics and it's human nature to get lazy to take your spouse for granted. Like some bros have shared instead of looking out to find that feeling, its better to put in effort to bring back that sparks with your wife. to cut the long story short, looking out would just be a redo of the whole cycle,eventually you would still get bored with the new person and if your spouse uncover the affair, it's a big scar on the relationship even if you choose to continue the marriage. Most woman do respond to just some gentleness from their man, to see a glimpse of what he was like during courtship. Taking her to an old haunt, doing activities that brings back good old memories would be lovely even if its a cycle day at ubin, going to an old place to eat your fav food

[neonx]

what i did is i got a sugarbaby

[okoyi]

I've been a closet follower of this forum for some time now. Reading/stalking the various posts with interest and sometimes envy. Decided to post this as a form of release/rant/reflection or whatever you call it.

You see, I've been married for more than 15 years and I have a successful career, a happy family and still enjoy regular sex with my wife. From the outside, most people would envy what I have. However, on the inside, I feel a certain emptiness... I miss the feeling of GFE, the chase, and perhaps even the thrill of making out in public places. I yearn for more than just sex, but also someone to have an intelligent conversation with, or to bounce a business idea off and cross check my thoughts and ending it off with some exhilarating sex. After all, what stimulates the most is the mind. :D

But... I guess there is too much to lose and too little to gain, not to mention finding someone suitable. I've tried paid dates from the popular sites but the conversations don't seem to stick. I must say some of them are pretty hot though. :D

Any guys share the same feelings?

P.S. I get the feel I might get zapped, after all this IS a sex forum...

Exact same thoughts and feelings - you are not alone in this.

[dadbod40]

Thanks for sharing everyone. I feel a little comforted I'm not alone on this. Like what many of you pointed out, I guess we're all perhaps seeking something only to realize that it was there all along... Being busy with career, kids has definitely not helped. :(


You sound like you are in a mid-life crisis and in a situation where most things are going your way and therefore you have the luxury to look at where you think is lacking. Count your blessings, and it's entire up to you on how you want to fulfil the gaps

Bro CheongingEdge, I think you nailed this one on the head. I am in sorta mid life crisis and I'm not really acknowledging it. Haha. Avoidance seems the easier solution?

After many years of marriage, who doesn't crave for some excitement, Bro dadbod40?

I'm sure some people will zap you but not me because, like you say, this is a Sex Forum so who am I to judge?

Those hot little SYT - all too superficial? Plastic? Artificial?

Bro SerflySGR, thanks for visiting my thread. Off topic but I enjoy your stories.

Yep, SYTs are nice to look at but sometimes too superficial and tiring to maintain any sort of proper conversation. :D


Tinder awaits your presence.

Hey bro, I totally get u.
Next, i am married for 17 years now. I do not have your 'inclinations'. But that does not place me on a higher moral ground looking down at u, no bro.
I have done more questionable shit than most of the average men in SG. I am not at your current 'stand-point' is because i have went through and experienced first hand those feelings that u have now.
Marriage is hard work and it will be until the last day.
My suggestion, it might seem naive or dumb given the forum and thread we are in. But is this, work with your missus. Slowly share your sentiment with her bit by bit.
I am telling u from experience again, the moment we share our innermost thoughts, doubts or lusts with our spouse, it strengthens the relationships.
Me and my old lady brought our sexual satisfaction to the next level when we open up about our fears and worries regarding marriage.
Not sure if any of the above would make any sense to u but i do hope that u put in a little more effort into your marriage.
It could be as simple as talking more candidly.
I said all these with the deepest respect, bro.

Bro cherrycoke, thanks. It does help to hear from someone who went through the same situation. I'm trying to work on that with the wife too and as I said, I think I'm still lucky to get some as compared to some other bros here who don't have that luxury.

Life is such, when you have a peqceful life it gets boring, when it's too much drama you want peace.
Its not uncommon to feel this way and it's not just man, woman can feel the same as well when sparks of love gets eroded with the changing dynamics with the arrival of kids, stress of work, office politics and it's human nature to get lazy to take your spouse for granted. Like some bros have shared instead of looking out to find that feeling, its better to put in effort to bring back that sparks with your wife. to cut the long story short, looking out would just be a redo of the whole cycle,eventually you would still get bored with the new person and if your spouse uncover the affair, it's a big scar on the relationship even if you choose to continue the marriage. Most woman do respond to just some gentleness from their man, to see a glimpse of what he was like during courtship. Taking her to an old haunt, doing activities that brings back good old memories would be lovely even if its a cycle day at ubin, going to an old place to eat your fav food


Bro driedlemon3, I'm definitely working on that. I realise it takes effort from me rather than just complaining. But can't help it sometimes cos after a hard day of work, coming home to a wife that's screaming at kids is the last thing I want to do... So I've been avoiding I guess...

[mrboombastic]

Definitely not alone in this bro.

You’re already lucky to still have an active sex life with your wife. Many a times, I try to be intimate with my wife. But the daily grind of family life usually puts a halt to these efforts... quarrels over kids... over housework... over extended family issues.... I really don’t know how to still be lovey dovey after that. So end up, probably 1 session a month?

But when it comes to eating outside, it’s not just about the thrill man. It’s... rejuvenating to some extent. Because it comes without all the baggage and responsibilities. And not sure if you guys feel this way. But sometimes after eating outside, I come home becoming a better husband. It could be out of guilt. I don’t know. But hey. It’s the outcome that matters right...?

[fatuncle]

Bro, count yourself lucky.

Both my wife and I have not hold hands not to mention sex for more than 3yrs. We have been sleeping seperately.

We do have daily oral sex though.. If 1 day she never Fuck me, then something is wrong. Whatever thing I do or say sure tio gan by her.

To outside, we are happily married with kids. But inside I am so lonely and super sad.

Last year, when Covid started, everyday kena fucked by her until I almost wanted to leave the house. If I have no kids, I will sure fuck her off!

Now I leanrned to ignore all her fucking and swuaning. Trying to take more course and make morw "friends" so that I cam find excuse to go out and "eat".
Especially if my course is in town. It is easy to book some ang pai ML ie. Xue Er.
Walking distance nia. :)

Hope you find ur happiness.

[donut88]

You not alone

I also like to look for GFE with other gals, especially smart intellectual ones.

So far, my FBs are all same profile. Smart, (some are very smart), attractive, next door gal type. Once on bed, they become slut and lots of GFE

Its the emotional comfort that we looking for. My FBs have no qualms to be with me and even prepared to marry me if I made myself single again. it's not just lust, but lots of attachments and love involved.

I always feel v happy to be with my FBs coz this is when I can share alot about myself and perceptions. And we are not Judgement towards each other.

Its different from our wives because wife can be judgemental and end up quarreling over little Things.

My FBs are understanding coz some are going through the same shit at home. We treat each other with respect and offer advice on problems at home or work.

I dont even talk about work problems with wife coz sometimes she can be judgemental and bias.

With FB, I can share anything I want and is always good coz I get advice or assurance from them.



I've been a closet follower of this forum for some time now. Reading/stalking the various posts with interest and sometimes envy. Decided to post this as a form of release/rant/reflection or whatever you call it.

You see, I've been married for more than 15 years and I have a successful career, a happy family and still enjoy regular sex with my wife. From the outside, most people would envy what I have. However, on the inside, I feel a certain emptiness... I miss the feeling of GFE, the chase, and perhaps even the thrill of making out in public places. I yearn for more than just sex, but also someone to have an intelligent conversation with, or to bounce a business idea off and cross check my thoughts and ending it off with some exhilarating sex. After all, what stimulates the most is the mind. :D

But... I guess there is too much to lose and too little to gain, not to mention finding someone suitable. I've tried paid dates from the popular sites but the conversations don't seem to stick. I must say some of them are pretty hot though. :D

Any guys share the same feelings?

P.S. I get the feel I might get zapped, after all this IS a sex forum...

[randyrockhard]

You not alone

I also like to look for GFE with other gals, especially smart intellectual ones.

So far, my FBs are all same profile. Smart, (some are very smart), attractive, next door gal type. Once on bed, they become slut and lots of GFE

Its the emotional comfort that we looking for. My FBs have no qualms to be with me and even prepared to marry me if I made myself single again. it's not just lust, but lots of attachments and love involved.

I always feel v happy to be with my FBs coz this is when I can share alot about myself and perceptions. And we are not Judgement towards each other.

Its different from our wives because wife can be judgemental and end up quarreling over little Things.

My FBs are understanding coz some are going through the same shit at home. We treat each other with respect and offer advice on problems at home or work.

I dont even talk about work problems with wife coz sometimes she can be judgemental and bias.

With FB, I can share anything I want and is always good coz I get advice or assurance from them.

Wouldn't the question of who you really want to be with, be raised?

And what would the answer to that be?

[donut88]

Wouldn't the question of who you really want to be with, be raised?

And what would the answer to that be?

Yes that's the tough question. We look for outside FB/FWB/GF, this question will always come out.

I was in catch 22 situation few times.

The solution is look for a gal who doesn't need your commitment. She can manage her own family situation without having you in the picture all the time.

So essentially she also only want you as FB too, not a life partner.

Once the emotions get too deep, then u know it's time to go.

[dadbod40]

Yes that's the tough question. We look for outside FB/FWB/GF, this question will always come out.

I was in catch 22 situation few times.

The solution is look for a gal who doesn't need your commitment. She can manage her own family situation without having you in the picture all the time.

So essentially she also only want you as FB too, not a life partner.

Once the emotions get too deep, then u know it's time to go.

See that's part of my fear as well... If eventually end up KC with whoever outside, its going to end quite badly for the kids.

That being said, like many brothers here have mentioned, I guess I still have it good, being able to be intimate with my wife regularly. I guess thats also the reason why I'm not eating out. If I were in the same situation as some of the bros here, I'm quite sure I would have done the same as well.

Some of my RL bros have told me to just make it transactional... But.I.Just.Can't... :(

A long time ago, I got to the point of heavy petting with a lady in the car and she was like asking me to fuck her there and then. Couldn't believe I backed out of it in the end. :o

[donut88]

So it's up to your decision.

Since your family life is still good, then dont think so much.

If u ever find outside gal, be smarter in choosing someone who can reciprocate the same expectation as you have

Now I'm with someone who doesn't need me in her life. She can manage her own family situation. So Its fine for now.

So It takes some level of maturity to understand the expectation from each other.


See that's part of my fear as well... If eventually end up KC with whoever outside, its going to end quite badly for the kids.

That being said, like many brothers here have mentioned, I guess I still have it good, being able to be intimate with my wife regularly. I guess thats also the reason why I'm not eating out. If I were in the same situation as some of the bros here, I'm quite sure I would have done the same as well.

Some of my RL bros have told me to just make it transactional... But.I.Just.Can't... :(

A long time ago, I got to the point of heavy petting with a lady in the car and she was like asking me to fuck her there and then. Couldn't believe I backed out of it in the end. :o

[randyrockhard]

So it's up to your decision.

Since your family life is still good, then dont think so much.

If u ever find outside gal, be smarter in choosing someone who can reciprocate the same expectation as you have

Now I'm with someone who doesn't need me in her life. She can manage her own family situation. So Its fine for now.

So It takes some level of maturity to understand the expectation from each other.

So happy for you. These things aren't easy for everyone involved.....

I experienced a horrible feeling when I thought everything was fine with my FB as we were having conversations and I casually talked about my main lady with her.

She looked at me with a teary eyes and said "Why are you here spending time with me now and not with her instead?"

That, literally broke my heart. After that I always try not to repeat the same mistake again...I just can't stand a crying woman.

[larue]

The idea that any single individual could fulfil all the needs of another (spiritually, emotionally, mentally, sexually, materially) is rather silly considering the odds of that happening. Maybe easier to win Toto.

Imagine If that’s what every body wants.

Most people have enough love for more than any one person at any one time. Women tend to see this as men simply making any excuse to take their dicks out of their pants though.

[aldrich87]

camping for more

[antares79]

IMHO goes back to the both of you to try n talk it out, im more adventurous type, wife more reserved, over the years im talked about stuff related to sex and sexual lifestyle n all, she picks up a few things along the way as well, been quite fun, til covid hits 😂 had some plans but now poof,
Anyway just talk with you wife n see if u both can work something creative

[HonkyTonkyMan]

So happy for you. These things aren't easy for everyone involved.....

I experienced a horrible feeling when I thought everything was fine with my FB as we were having conversations and I casually talked about my main lady with her.

She looked at me with a teary eyes and said "Why are you here spending time with me now and not with her instead?"

That, literally broke my heart. After that I always try not to repeat the same mistake again...I just can't stand a crying woman.
alamak this type can turn fatal attraction sounds like she getting emo already no more just fb status...best to back out asap...i made the mistake of carrying on and ended up with the biggest mistake of my life..:(

[BackstageBambi]

So happy for you. These things aren't easy for everyone involved.....

I experienced a horrible feeling when I thought everything was fine with my FB as we were having conversations and I casually talked about my main lady with her.

She looked at me with a teary eyes and said "Why are you here spending time with me now and not with her instead?"

That, literally broke my heart. After that I always try not to repeat the same mistake again...I just can't stand a crying woman.

Isn’t this kind of treading on dangerous territory?
Sounds like your FB is treating you as more than just pure FB.
I made a mistake once with an ex-FB and promised myself never to repeat the same error again.

[PeteTsang69]

alamak this type can turn fatal attraction sounds like she getting emo already no more just fb status...best to back out asap...i made the mistake of carrying on and ended up with the biggest mistake of my life..:(

thanks bro ... but maybe can share why it ended up being biggest mistake of your life ...:o

my own story is long & complicated ... but not unusual
maybe can share some thoughts, ... in hindsight

1. accept the truth of human nature :) (me, high sex drive, sexual pleasure is important part, i am ok to be committed to one)

2. choose wisely, carefully & responsibly, cos shld be for life, to be fair to the other person - high+high/ low+low is best ...high+low= bad tragic disaster waiting to happen

3. test before buying ... signs that its good match ... kisses are long, touch is electric, hold hands, hug tight, foreplay is long, say good morning/good night ... all done every time together without missing once ..

4. the above are important bcos, as with ALL things in life ... they either grow (stronger/closer) or if it stays constant, will slowly die ... GROWTH is Key ...

5. has been said before by others ... TEST: "she makes me feel i want to be a best man i can" 1+1=5 :)

[randyrockhard]

thanks bro ... but maybe can share why it ended up being biggest mistake of your life ...:o

my own story is long & complicated ... but not unusual
maybe can share some thoughts, ... in hindsight

1. accept the truth of human nature :) (me, high sex drive, sexual pleasure is important part, i am ok to be committed to one)

2. choose wisely, carefully & responsibly, cos shld be for life, to be fair to the other person - high+high/ low+low is best ...high+low= bad tragic disaster waiting to happen

3. test before buying ... signs that its good match ... kisses are long, touch is electric, hold hands, hug tight, foreplay is long, say good morning/good night ... all done every time together without missing once ..

4. the above are important bcos, as with ALL things in life ... they either grow (stronger/closer) or if it stays constant, will slowly die ... GROWTH is Key ...

5. has been said before by others ... TEST: "she makes me feel i want to be a best man i can" 1+1=5 :)

What do you do when the main woman you are with, fails to make you feel wanting to be the best man you could?

I am in the situation right now where the woman is simply not mature enough to be civilized. She is verbally abusive and play the silent treatment game.

[donut88]

Once your FB is like this, u got to let go. Too much emotions involved and obviously she wants more than just a FB.

Happened to me before. Fought many times and patch up as many times. But we know it's not going anywhere.

One of my FBs has the right mindset for a FB relationship.

She said "it's like window shopping."

If you can get a gal who thinks like window shopping, hosay Liao.

So happy for you. These things aren't easy for everyone involved.....

I experienced a horrible feeling when I thought everything was fine with my FB as we were having conversations and I casually talked about my main lady with her.

She looked at me with a teary eyes and said "Why are you here spending time with me now and not with her instead?"

That, literally broke my heart. After that I always try not to repeat the same mistake again...I just can't stand a crying woman.

[afterburn]

The idea that any single individual could fulfil all the needs of another (spiritually, emotionally, mentally, sexually, materially) is rather silly considering the odds of that happening.

Most people have enough love for more than any one person at any one time.

And these are the truth :)

Real life is not perfect, and people do change over the years. It's like mechanical or structural parts, in the beginning may have a perfect fit, but over the years, both parts must have sufficient tolerances to continue having a good if not perfect fit.

Close one eye and deaf in one ear is the best practice - for both parties :D Life can continue to be good this way.

[PeteTsang69]

What do you do when the main woman you are with, fails to make you feel wanting to be the best man you could?

I am in the situation right now where the woman is simply not mature enough to be civilized. She is verbally abusive and play the silent treatment game.

i don't have any advice ... cos i'm still in it ... so just sharing
1. kids are involved ... this tricky, i've got to consider their well being, they look up to me & are close their mum
2. ultimately have to ask what i want in life ... platonic relationship with spouse & family in tact or ... ?
3. life is about compromises/sacrifices ... each has to decide what they want & what price/sacrifice they are willing to have ...
4. what eats me up at times is i have tasted the fruit of someone who is into me as much as i am into her physically ...
5. its like i'm driving in "eco" mode ... didn't know i could go into "track" mode ... but once you know you can ... you now know you can be more, but then choose not to for all sorts of reasons .. :rolleyes:

[HonkyTonkyMan]

thanks bro ... but maybe can share why it ended up being biggest mistake of your life ...:o


Well lets say heart got soft with all the tears and drama etc threats of suicide etc...should have remain steadfast and walk away but i didn't...end up divorce remarried blah blah blah the usual and now 20 years down the road found out all those excitement and changes you thought you wanted its still the same shit..:(

[deematter]

is better to express your feeling out than just keep it inside your heart

[PeteTsang69]

... heart got soft with all the tears and drama etc threats of suicide etc...should have remain steadfast and walk away but i didn't..:(

:eek: wow bro, thats not a good way to enter any relationship ... being played for with your good heart ... :o ... thanks for sharing ...warning to others be aware

[HonkyTonkyMan]

:eek: wow bro, thats not a good way to enter any relationship ... being played for with your good heart ... :o ... thanks for sharing ...warning to others be aware

well i should have taken a good friend advice back then : 男人皮要厚心要黑
cannot waver if we want to come out play the field..

[Rickey]

A long time ago, I got to the point of heavy petting with a lady in the car and she was like asking me to fuck her there and then. Couldn't believe I backed out of it in the end. :o
That shows u r such a good boy TS, like me :);)...dare not proceed even when offered by the lady :o

[Rickey]

Definitely not alone in this bro.

But when it comes to eating outside, it’s not just about the thrill man. It’s... rejuvenating to some extent. Because it comes without all the baggage and responsibilities. And not sure if you guys feel this way. But sometimes after eating outside, I come home becoming a better husband. It could be out of guilt. I don’t know. But hey. It’s the outcome that matters right...?
Quite agree with tis bro...maybe cos u hv enjoyed so much with the 3rd party when outside that when u return home, the good nice feeling continue to overflow at home :)...so u don't feel that miserable

[Rickey]

I always feel v happy to be with my FBs coz this is when I can share alot about myself and perceptions. And we are not Judgement towards each other.

Its different from our wives because wife can be judgemental and end up quarreling over little Things.

My FBs are understanding coz some are going through the same shit at home. We treat each other with respect and offer advice on problems at home or work.

I dont even talk about work problems with wife coz sometimes she can be judgemental and bias.

With FB, I can share anything I want and is always good coz I get advice or assurance from them.
That's why FBs r better than wives in tis sense :)

[Jabba]

I think we guys missed those dating life that we used to have back in our younger days.We wanted to feel the excitement of life once again!

[donut88]

TS, take it from me as experienced player for many years with multiple FBs.

Don't get into this if u haven't start yet

U cannot handle the mess and emotional roller coaster.

It takes alot of thinking, planning and KC management skills to be with a FB.

If you can just tahan the current family life, leave it as it is. Try to improve. If cannot improve, nevermind. As long as your wife is not giving you hell at home, it's ok then

Dont look for extra trouble with FBs.

If you need sex, go for commercial. Fire and forget

In terms of $, FB and commercial are the same. U have to spend same money on either one.

[georgie1994]

yes you will feel lose of excitement somehow, perhaps like many other guy chat with girl from sugarbook,com silently, but just chat, not do other things

[georgie1994]

is better to express your feeling out than just keep it inside your heart

yes agree in marriage life better talk frankly and honestly

[georgie1994]

And these are the truth :)

Real life is not perfect, and people do change over the years. It's like mechanical or structural parts, in the beginning may have a perfect fit, but over the years, both parts must have sufficient tolerances to continue having a good if not perfect fit.

Close one eye and deaf in one ear is the best practice - for both parties :D Life can continue to be good this way.

that is the reason there is 7 years itchy period, once you get over then is ok already

[dadbod40]

That shows u r such a good boy TS, like me :);)...dare not proceed even when offered by the lady :o

Lol bro Rickey don't make fun of me leh...

[dadbod40]

TS, take it from me as experienced player for many years with multiple FBs.

Don't get into this if u haven't start yet

U cannot handle the mess and emotional roller coaster.

It takes alot of thinking, planning and KC management skills to be with a FB.

If you can just tahan the current family life, leave it as it is. Try to improve. If cannot improve, nevermind. As long as your wife is not giving you hell at home, it's ok then

Dont look for extra trouble with FBs.

If you need sex, go for commercial. Fire and forget

In terms of $, FB and commercial are the same. U have to spend same money on either one.

I hear you sir... that's the reason for the post... :o

[Rickey]

Lol bro Rickey don't make fun of me leh...
Nope, not making fun of u bro TS dadbod40...just saying u r like me...we r quite similar in this respect...respect women too much n r too tender towards them :o

[Irrumare]

Just a curious question, I believe some did but did most you put yourself in the wife’s shoes and reflect whether who is the party that need to make a change? It could be a soft change like saying more sweet things or even helping with the dishes or carrying of grocery bags..
This just reeks of a mass circle jerk where everyone agrees to each other and perhaps cements the notion that if wife don’t treat you good, then go out or just tahan.

The key to a successful marriage is knowing how to communicate as well as compartmentalising.
Different things go into different brackets, and nary the one should merge or else it will be incendiary.
Perhaps let your partner or even yourself, take a personality test and go from there.
Read up more about their love languages and I’m sure you’ll feel happier since this is also sort of communication.

At the end of the day, you’re sleeping with your wife at home and if you can’t even talk to her, that’s pretty sad isn’t it?

I believe the first step of finding out an issue, be it personal or not, is internalizing and that’s what a lot of people struggle with.
They always see problems very narrow-mindedly and everything is ‘it’s not me that needs to change, it’s other people’.

Perhaps it’s my interpretation or misinterpretation but, just my 2 cents.

[antares79]

My sympathy to TS,
But like many bros said here, better think again

[ralliart]

Interesting thread... Makes me wonder back how families managed back in the olden days and I came to a simple conclusion. Social environment evolves thru time.

Back in the old days we don't see high divorce rates or broken families like we do now. So what exactly happened?

Now we have more females in the working industries means more interaction with them. Communication methods is much easier with today's technology. Information at your fingertips not like the old days.

With all these social changes around us, it's either we make the moves or someone seduces you. Most importantly is how you decide what you want. No right or wrong, only want or don't want.

[newyorker88]

Interesting thread... Makes me wonder back how families managed back in the olden days and I came to a simple conclusion. Social environment evolves thru time.

Back in the old days we don't see high divorce rates or broken families like we do now. So what exactly happened?

Now we have more females in the working industries means more interaction with them. Communication methods is much easier with today's technology. Information at your fingertips not like the old days.

With all these social changes around us, it's either we make the moves or someone seduces you. Most importantly is how you decide what you want. No right or wrong, only want or don't want.



Woman stayed on for family n for sake of economic stability. Face n stigma also. That’s the past. Now woman has more freedom n choice to be alone. Times changed.

[ralliart]

Woman stayed on for family n for sake of economic stability. Face n stigma also. That’s the past. Now woman has more freedom n choice to be alone. Times changed.

Exactly. Those days are what we experienced in NS... See ladies (be it slim fat aeroplane big headlights cute ugly) nia wanna tear uniform turn werewolf liao :p

[dadbod40]

Woman stayed on for family n for sake of economic stability. Face n stigma also. That’s the past. Now woman has more freedom n choice to be alone. Times changed.

Perhaps we should invite more ladies to give their views. :D

[jeci]

My sympathy to TS,
But like many bros said here, better think again

Yes, better think 3x before acting.

[driedlemon3]

Perhaps we should invite more ladies to give their views. :D
yes financial ability has certainly allow women to be able to walk away from unhappy relationship. our society is still conservative though but younger people are more individualistic and not really bothered about other people's views.