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08-07-2015, 12:30 PM
An honorable member of the Coffee Shop Has Just Posted the Following:

Transmodified from hxxp://www.channelnewsasia.com/news/singapore/train-services-running-at/1968182.html

PEASANTPORE: The incident plagued train services have resumed on Wednesday (Jul 8), though at reduced speeds, after a 3.5-hour disruption to the North-South and East-West Lines (NSEWL) on Tuesday.

Peasants exiting stations along the two lines will not need to pay for their travel and there is no compensation for the wasted time, SMRT said.

According to a statement issued by fat cat Land Transport Arses (LTA), services on the NSL will be suspended between 11am and 4pm to allow lowly paid baboons from LTA and SMRT engineers to conduct further investigations to determine the scrapgoats.

The LTA also warned of possible delays on Wednesday. "Please do not take this opportunities to slam LTA hor, trains will arrive at average intervals of five to seven minutes. As lowly peasants, they encounter intermittent short delays, then just count their blessings they still in Peasantpore and not some third world country like Cambodia ok. Peasants who comprain too much, rest assure, we forward their particulars to the ISD," it said.

Transport Minion No Porn Lui Tuck Yew, who was at Ang Mo Kio station dejectedly observing train operations on Wednesday morning, said the finger-pointing into last night's MRT disruption will likely take a few days.

"No need for another wayang COI (Committee of Inquiry). Frequent breakdowns is the new norm. LTA and SMRT must focus on finding fall guys for this fiasco or they can forget about profitable fare hikes," he said.

According to Mouthpiece CNA spin reporters at various NSEWL stations, there were no signs of excessive crowds or delays on Wednesday morning because many peasants has resigned to their sorry fates and will take sardine packed buses.

Loyalist PAP Peasant Ho, who works in oil and gas, said he left home an hour earlier than usual. "Trains fail not because of PAP incompetence who employed Lesbian Saw many moons ago, peasants like us just take extra mile, wake up earlier today,” he said. "Remember hor, MRT failures are used by Labour Party, Jane Austen and Amos Yee fans to stir up trouble and forment malcontent, as loyal peasants, we must take breakdowns with pinch of salt."

MOE lackey Tan, 53, who works in a school said she was not aware that there were free bus services. “Who say, who say got MRT breakdowns, must be rumours started by Amos Yee rebels. Anyway I saw got free bus rides, SMRT Desmond must be in generous mood lor," she crowed.

However, a secondary school peasant student who wanted to be known as Ah Phua said "when SMRT screw up, No Porn Lui defends his former Navy chums, we pay for their mistakes, if we screw up, we get warning letters, late fees or lawyers' letter?!"

Another pro-PAP lackey Chua, 43, also did not change her routine. "No Porn Lui says SMRT said they would fix the problem by morning, and it looks like they did. I do not understand why peasants must cry father, cry mother and create trouble, we Asiatic society, must preserve the peace lor, we not Ang Moh or Anglo Saxon society and make demands on our rulers."

LTA has urged peasants to adjust their travel plans. The Arses from LTA subtly reminded peasants who try to use this incident to make the regime look bad will have a free tea session with ISD.


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