Silent Break ?

[xpinkyx-moment]

Its a very stupid topics I know ,
But some points of times , peoples do mistakes in life and causes a relationship/friendship to brokeup .

In this forum I noe is abt SEX , which mean abt Female and Male .
And since I'm in this sections : Matters of the heart so lets talk abt relationship.

So If lets say a Female and Male quarrel , And it had lead to Cold WAR ...
does ignoring the opposite partner means
"I AM breaking up with you " or "I ALREADY broke up with you" or
"the opposite just want peace for the moment" ?

This qns is abit confusing ~ becoz I am kind of lost here ...


Is like a Male made a Female Angry , so the Female accidentally also made the male angry ..

Female : are you still angry now ?
Male : silent (he is angry so he silent / or he really dun bother anymore / or he also dunno )

After few days( the female did apologized for her mistakes )
Female(confused) : so what are we now ? still together or not ?
male : silent ( he is trying to giving face by not hurting her directly say out , or he hack care , or he jus need some space?)

Sometym silent break up is the most torturing things .. I also dunno can I say this is a silent break up at all ?


Story is not clear enuff , I myself cannot see out the whole pictures ...


What was the mistake this both person did was
Female : felt insecured by his silent at lots of times , thats why text alot .
Male : always silent , confused the female ... annoyed by female text .

Actually the female knows mens need space , and she also noes communication is very important .. But in this point of time , it seem like the male dun wanna make any communication with the female ..

The female will nv know what this men wants .
so back to the 1st qns , is this a silent break ?

[ShortD]

Sees like it from my point of view.

Maybe the guy have not think of a way to bring it across without hurting the gal so he choose to keep quiet.

Just take some time off if 2 person is meant to be together some way along your life he will appear in your life again at the right time. (My personal point of view)

[W1ck3dSecret]

In my case when we do ignore one another, it means give time to recollect our thoughts before we make any regrettable move or blurt any hurtful yet angry words.

Silent after being popped together or not. Hmmm .... May not necessary be a silent break. Perhaps the guy he himself don't even know what he wants.
It's absurd if he remains indecisive for a long while to resolve the issue. Totally unfair to the lady! Give both a reasonable timeframe and settle peacefully.

[Triple70]

Both male and female have very different methods to handle issues.
At the end of the day, it's about being accommodating to the other party's personality.

To seek closure to this episode (not the Season finale hor) .. try the following method.

Can we talk?
I don't want this to end, but if its the end, lets seek closure by clearing all misunderstandings.

Never be demanding by making any assumptions, like "Are we still together?"

[xpinkyx-moment]

no wonder ~~
so basically Is I dunno the method of talking la ...

Hahaha ~ ..
no wonder some times words fight with my friends always some say I very straightforward nv think before when speaks .
Enlighten ~

[PPGirl]

When couple is in cold war, sometimes is gd to keep quiet or silent.

When one is angry with another, there bound to be harsh words.
I think the question to ask "together or not" is not the correct time at this moment.

During cold war, inspite getting ignored by other party, maybe can break d cold war by showing concern instead. can ask things like"have u eaten", "hows work".
can let the other party knows u still care abt him/her. avoid texting alot as may not know whether words are too harsh or not n texts no tone so it may sound angry.

And ignoring the other party doesnt means breaking up.

Maybe it means to have a cool off period so both parties can think abt what went wrong.

[xpinkyx-moment]

When couple is in cold war, sometimes is gd to keep quiet or silent.

When one is angry with another, there bound to be harsh words.
I think the question to ask "together or not" is not the correct time at this moment.

During cold war, inspite getting ignored by other party, maybe can break d cold war by showing concern instead. can ask things like"have u eaten", "hows work".
can let the other party knows u still care abt him/her. avoid texting alot as may not know whether words are too harsh or not n texts no tone so it may sound angry.

And ignoring the other party doesnt means breaking up.

Maybe it means to have a cool off period so both parties can think abt what went wrong.

Haha Thankz PPG Jie ~

Anyway Is now not really say cold war le ba ...
Is more like 1 side dun wanna accept apologize , 1 side no face to apologize le .. Anyway Is I'm the one ridiculous one lols ...
When I read back what I'd sent that time on this few days ,
I also cannot believe those hurtful text was I Sent out de..
If Im the guy , I will also feel like giving the gal a slap haha ...
He nv scold me I sld be gladful about le ba haha ..

*Machiam felt like I kenna possesed like that for the past few weeks hahaha ,,,, uncleared mind ... now clearer le lolz .

[PPGirl]

Haha Thankz PPG Jie ~

Anyway Is now not really say cold war le ba ...
Is more like 1 side dun wanna accept apologize , 1 side no face to apologize le .. Anyway Is I'm the one ridiculous one lols ...
When I read back what I'd sent that time on this few days ,
I also cannot believe those hurtful text was I Sent out de..
If Im the guy , I will also feel like giving the gal a slap haha ...
He nv scold me I sld be gladful about le ba haha ..

*Machiam felt like I kenna possesed like that for the past few weeks hahaha ,,,, uncleared mind ... now clearer le lolz .

so r u the one no face to apologize? :p
if u cherish the relationship, its gd to make the first move to apologise.
Be it who is correct or wrong in the first place

sometimes i do argue with my guy b4 & cold wars many times but after each cold war, our feelings getting stronger.

Hope u can cherish this relationship of yours.
Its not ez for 2 to meet & to be tgt:)

[Triple70]

Sometimes is not about apologise.
Is about just letting go the emotions and call each other up and make plans as if the whole episode din happen.

Anyway..apologise got different pattern.
" I am sorry that u feel this way", is must easier to say than "I am sorry for being harsh."

[xpinkyx-moment]

Nope, not I no face to apologizes anymore ..is no courage to face another rejection le maybe .
also not he dun wanna accept the apologize ..
is we understood this "silent" inner meaning means what already ..
its not a "break" ...its a way to shows he "treasures" ..

It's a treasure thats why he choose to stop breaking my heart anymore ...

Sometyms things there is no right and wrong ...
what stupid mistakes we done accidentally cannot be undone ...

During this silents period I somehow enlighten lol ~ And our lives/days still moves on ..
And what I've learned something new is...
爱不一定是要拥有，有一种爱叫做放手。以后还有可能做朋友，但绝对不是敌人。 I think this is what he wanna teach mi de ..

----------------------

There is no point of fighting on both of us who is right who is wrong ..
no point of argueing Who win or who lose ~
coz when time passes all this problems win or lose , right or wrong also will become useless one day .

to a men pov :
fight/argue for wat with a gal , jus leave , case close ...

to a women pov :
why u dun even bother to fight with mi ? why why why why why whhhh ... ... forever no ending lolz.

--------------------------
**at alot of times people magnify/zoom in to small details to find out what is others ppl's problem ..
When we really steps out of the picture frames , then we often realise What is our(my) problem ..

------------------------------

Anyway now this thread can stop le, no points to continue . lolz .

Thanks bros who pm mi , haha I posted this thread not to catch guys attentions , or act pity or want console from guys ,
but jus that at the point of moment , I'm really confuse tat tym lolz , and wanna noes where goes wrongs , so without double thinking in a harshed I posted this thread.


Hahaha . after seeing this thread that I created , I felt I very stupid and embarress , muahaha , can I dig a hole and Hide somewhere ? lolz .
Laughing at my own "imatured" actions haha .

--------------------------------

Most suitable songs for this thread will be :
Jay chou - 安静 , 借口
Lee sheng Jie - 手放开。

------------------------------------

In this forum if talk love , really can say
你幸福所以我幸福。
if talk sex :
你性服，所以我性服。

[<<totally>>]

In this forum if talk love , really can say
你幸福所以我幸福。
All I can say is, what you thought, might not what he think. What he think, might not what he say. What he say, might not what you hear. What you hear, might not what you like.

Leaving things unsaid is a way of saying things. You get to choose what he thinks. So make yourself feel better by thinking the correct way.

You are preserving the image of him to look prefect in your memory.
爱他不必拥有他，祝福他也是爱他另个方式。:D

[xpinkyx-moment]

all i can say is, what you thought, might not what he think. What he think, might not what he say. What he say, might not what you hear. What you hear, might not what you like.

Leaving things unsaid is a way of saying things. You get to choose what he thinks. So make yourself feel better by thinking the correct way.

You are preserving the image of him to look prefect in your memory.
爱他不必拥有他，祝福他也是爱他另个方式。:d

对了啊~　最后那两句就是我此刻的心　。
就是这样子而已　。　
原因因为我不喜欢人家恨我，自己也不喜欢恨人家，就换个角度来欣赏人家好了。

可是你的签名那句， ＂你要这样想让你咯 ＂ ... 女人看了最讨厌。

[Janet_W]

sounds so sad :(

[flowbow]

So it really was a silent break...?

[xpinkyx-moment]

Lot things unclear , unspoken , unknown ..
The only things I know is "He is still alive" ...


Best songs to describe me now ...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QKb30DgwZ7Y

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mBRUkdQa6Is

Best songs to describe him now ...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VbPgHloaips

[79trying]

Hi,

Silence is golden but I believe it's not applicable for your scenario painted.
Some time down the road, many "what if ...." Will pop up ....
I feel it's better to make things clear ...... If its meant to be, it's meant to be.
Just my feeling about your scenario.

trying79

[Janet_W]

clear the air or u might always hv regrets

[xpinkyx-moment]

Hi,

Silence is golden but I believe it's not applicable for your scenario painted.
Some time down the road, many "what if ...." Will pop up ....
I feel it's better to make things clear ...... If its meant to be, it's meant to be.
Just my feeling about your scenario.

trying79

There is too many What if ....

I tried le , I step out my first step to contact him that day le ...
He didn't picks up and sms also no reply Le .

The only thing i regret most is how can I make "assumptions" on him ..
Anyway how we both hurt each other , the scars will never heal ...

But still have to move forward .. =)

[xpinkyx-moment]

clear the air or u might always hv regrets

If I got the chance to clear the air , problems would have solved earlier le ..

[hardworking48]

Its very simple, he wants you to get pissed off and leave him. He's showing signs that he doesn't want you anymore and hopes that you get the silent message. He doesn't have the balls to tell you directly so he use the silent method.

Understand?

[xpinkyx-moment]

I'm so sorry to hear this. Only way is move forward and start anew:)

Of coz I will no worries =)..

[xpinkyx-moment]

Its very simple, he wants you to get pissed off and leave him. He's showing signs that he doesn't want you anymore and hopes that you get the silent message. He doesn't have the balls to tell you directly so he use the silent method.

Understand?

Yup understood ... He no balls , at least I have the pussy to moves on haha :D

[peekaboo]

to a women pov :
why u dun even bother to fight with mi ? why why why why why whhhh ... ... forever no ending lolz.


Occasional fighting can spices things up a little.
Too much will ruin the relationship.

Maybe you think feminine means weak and you should fight. Then you only know one meaning of feminine. There are more then one meaning of feminine.

[Wintermelontea]

So sad...but glad u moved on.

Hope he will reply you one day and still maintain the friendship (for old times sake.)

Jy!

[buntalo]

silent break ?
cold war ?
forget avthing and start a fire which will burn you up ..
finish burned .. then welcome the new life lo ..
simple and easy

[curiouslala]

hi x-pinky sis

well, i knew few guy who like to do this kind of silent treatment.
and even if i asked, he will just silent, not replying, not saying anything.

for me, if i bo tahan alrdy, i'll just end it from my end and left him.
i'm not very patience. and after some time, when my patience gone, then i'll just end the relationship by telling it to him. and moving on.
its not like i'm not trying to communicate it to him. i did. but he just never say anything.
and i think, break up mustn't be some kind of agreement of two people. if one of it want to break it, just break it lo.

[Nsdselvlian]

I prefer guys to be more straight forward too. Want to break, just text will do and I swear that I will strike him off the list!! Don't need to MIA or beat around the bush.

No balls.

[Wintermelontea]

I prefer guys to be more straight forward too. Want to break, just text will do and I swear that I will strike him off the list!! Don't need to MIA or beat around the bush.

No balls.


want to break, tell me straight to my face and not text...bcoz i believe if i text a gal and ask her to be my gf, how sincere is that...bottom line, sincerity.

i rather have friendship than to have an enemy. that's me.

[Nsdselvlian]

want to break, tell me straight to my face and not text...bcoz i believe if i text a gal and ask her to be my gf, how sincere is that...bottom line, sincerity.

i rather have friendship than to have an enemy. that's me.

All women prefer men to be direct n frank ... be a man.

[cmelater]

Men also prefer women to be forthcoming.

What kills everything is the usual stupid assumption like "you are suppose to know" and "its your fault. damn it.... just admit!"

Unfortunately for some gals, its about the things that they want to hear. Not so much the guy's honest opinion or answer. Then what should it be? To talk, to lie or not just say anything. At some point in time, it gets very tiring.... when talking seems to lead nowhere.

Worse.... don't talk, but post the dirty linen on facebook. It becomes outright self victimisation. Come to think of it.... its frightening to know a person too well. Social media is as good as the press and in fact better.

With all that, is the relationship worth pursuing at all? Marriage becomes the only war where one gets to sleep with the enemy. Heart to heart talk is never quite heart to heart.

[Botakhead]

Forget this r/s, f/s, it's taken you too much to try to fix it. If he quiet quiet, did he think you will understand why? If he cannot bear to open his golden mouth to be frank with you upfront, don't even give him a chance to be your friend anymore. Ignore him when he finally thinks of you, not worth of your attention at all.

Cheers and stay happy always. :)