"I'm married, how did I get here?" Am I the only one who feels this way?

[Rainyday]

I dated my old schoolmate, life with her was comfortable and regular, and it move along like a row boat going gently down the stream. Then she started pressuring me about getting married, then her family joined in. First it was once a month then it became once a week then it became once in a few days. And friends will always ask 'so when's your turn' 'she's good for you' 'you're both good together' 'you're both suitable for each other'

Then I began to think why not? What am I waiting for? There's nothing wrong with her. If I break up with her now, the next gf could be better but could also be worse. There were small issues but I told myself they would clear up after marriage. Her parents are great etc etc. Do I love her? Yeah I guess, I know I don't NOT love her.

Slowly the doubt was drowned out by my own reasoning, the sound of her nagging, and other practical considerations then BANG. Here I am married and still doubtful.

I still look at girls and wonder why my wife doesn't care about her figure, I meet other girls with whom I have great friendships and excellent chemistry. Sometimes I even wonder how life would be if I married them instead.

Any Samster bros like this? Nothing very bad to complain about but not very happy either. How do you deal with it?

I don't really care if I have sex with her regularly or not-nice to have but ok lah. Sex with her is more of an emotional thing, i can't say i find her body attractive. Instead I jerk off almost everyday fantasising about other girls... Fortunately I can do both in one day too.

I'm sure other bros must face some point in their marriage like this, would like to hear what and how you deal with it? Any stories? Advice? Care to share?

[TonyStarkMK8]

Hey bro, I'm also married at a young age when I was 21. The main reason for getting married at such a young age is because of housing problems. My dad is bankrupt due to gambling and my mum divorced with him long ago. I did NOT marry my wife just because of housing problems. I love her, even until today, I still love her very much.

Here's the problem, quite alike to yours. She was already not in perfect shape before marriage, about 55kg and 162cm. After awhile in our marriage, she became 64kg. Her size didn't affect my love for her at all. Its just the sexual desire towards her dropped drastically. I used to fap to porn occasionally. That quite helped me to curb the urge.

As time goes by, I got touched by the devil. I started to look for other girls. The very first one was a WL in GL. The feeling was extremely good man. Its like trying the best cut steak for the first time in your life. I was very confused with myself that time. I felt guilty for such an act but also good at the same time. It definitely didn't just stop there. Now here I am, moved on to not just WLs in GL, but also FLs on the various FL Domes.

I guess it isn't exactly a bad thing. I still love my wife very much. As contradicting as it might sound to you, I actually love her even more. Just be sure you don't fall for anyone else and stay faithful(in your heart) towards her. You can't control your small brain. You might be able to now but you can never control it forever.

Just my 2 cents :)

[singmarine]

It is true most if not all wives dun care about their figures/looks. Bascially they feel after marriage all these apperance thingy is not important. They start to dress behave towards like aunties making themshelves old.

I call it a self-fulfilling prophecy. That's why many men stray.

[HCKing]

reminds me of a wonderful joke...:D

The World's Shortest Fairy Tale:

Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl 'Will you marry me?' The girl said, 'NO!' And the guy lived happily ever after and rode motorcycles and went fishing and hunting and played golf a lot and drank beer and scotch and left the toilet seat up and farted whenever he wanted.

THE END

[maxsee]

Don't fret over ur marriage too much...u r not alone on this...there are tons of guys out there who regretted getting marriage and only a tiny handful of guys that enjoys marriage life.....

One thing for sure though...i would rather die than ever get married...:D:D:D

[hamsapkwai]

Any time you find yourself in a shit hole situation , always rewind and reflect.

There was always a point where you were allowed to choose and to say NO or STOP!

But you chose not to, hence you are where you are.

And in that dreaded ceremony where u lose your freedom , i am sure you said something to this effect.........

to be my (wife/husband), to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health,whether you lose your figure or not.....:p

[organiser]

I dated my old schoolmate, life with her was comfortable and regular, and it move along like a row boat going gently down the stream. Then she started pressuring me about getting married, then her family joined in. First it was once a month then it became once a week then it became once in a few days. And friends will always ask 'so when's your turn' 'she's good for you' 'you're both good together' 'you're both suitable for each other'

Then I began to think why not? What am I waiting for? There's nothing wrong with her. If I break up with her now, the next gf could be better but could also be worse. There were small issues but I told myself they would clear up after marriage. Her parents are great etc etc. Do I love her? Yeah I guess, I know I don't NOT love her.

Slowly the doubt was drowned out by my own reasoning, the sound of her nagging, and other practical considerations then BANG. Here I am married and still doubtful.

I still look at girls and wonder why my wife doesn't care about her figure, I meet other girls with whom I have great friendships and excellent chemistry. Sometimes I even wonder how life would be if I married them instead.

Any Samster bros like this? Nothing very bad to complain about but not very happy either. How do you deal with it?

I don't really care if I have sex with her regularly or not-nice to have but ok lah. Sex with her is more of an emotional thing, i can't say i find her body attractive. Instead I jerk off almost everyday fantasising about other girls... Fortunately I can do both in one day too.

I'm sure other bros must face some point in their marriage like this, would like to hear what and how you deal with it? Any stories? Advice? Care to share?

had a buddy whom like u just got married. he hates it and its more of a responsibility than liking. he partonises joints and like girls. he hates his life which seems like a 40 yr old marriage

[organiser]

reminds me of a wonderful joke...:D

The World's Shortest Fairy Tale:

Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl 'Will you marry me?' The girl said, 'NO!' And the guy lived happily ever after and rode motorcycles and went fishing and hunting and played golf a lot and drank beer and scotch and left the toilet seat up and farted whenever he wanted.

THE END

HC king u wanna try ang moh not hard lah. its a matter of u pay or u dont.

[sane]

One thing for sure though...i would rather die then ever married...:D:D:D
Im with you on this. Its the best not to marry out of pity n ruined the life of the gal. Its' not that they r stupid, just they choose to suffer in silent.

[SushiJiro]

As time goes by, I got touched by the devil. I started to look for other girls. The very first one was a WL in GL. The feeling was extremely good man. Its like trying the best cut steak for the first time in your life. I was very confused with myself that time. I felt guilty for such an act but also good at the same time. It definitely didn't just stop there. Now here I am, moved on to not just WLs in GL, but also FLs on the various FL Domes.

I guess it isn't exactly a bad thing. I still love my wife very much. As contradicting as it might sound to you, I actually love her even more. Just be sure you don't fall for anyone else and stay faithful(in your heart) towards her. You can't control your small brain. You might be able to now but you can never control it forever.

Just my 2 cents :)

Thanks for the honest sharing of your story :)

[Spikerman]

Wife is a companion to have and hold and cherish till end of days. Main requirements are best friend, good communication and understanding. Hot bod + horny slut is always a bonus but life isn't always fair / ez peasy ...

Hope you figure out your bottom line ... I think most importantly ... do you love her ? If she loves you for all that you are ... then you're a lucky man :D

[Sen5eS]

I guess it isn't exactly a bad thing. I still love my wife very much. As contradicting as it might sound to you, I actually love her even more. Just be sure you don't fall for anyone else and stay faithful(in your heart) towards her. You can't control your small brain. You might be able to now but you can never control it forever.

Interesting Share Bro :D:)

[anthonyKKW]

TS bro, I married my wife the same way as you did. I don't NOT like her, and don't know whether next one is better or worst. Made the scientific and rational decision to married her at the age of 23. Now married for 17 years.

Sex life is no longer satisfying. One of the reasons why I am on SBF. Initially go interested in porn sites, next went on to massage with HJ. Gradually tried WLs, occasionally overseas and very very rarely in SG. Now trying my best to stick to HJ service and clean hair spa like MTW. Both venues can experience chio bu and GFE, safely.

At home, I am committed and responsible to my family. It's like my family is 90% of me and playing outside is 10%.

Bottom line: you are not alone. Whatever you do, family always comes first.

[stillgottheblue]

I just know if there is any trouble, any problems with me, my wife is always with me and for me, when all relatives, best friends and associates left you. Isn't it enough to know this one thing?

You have to experience bad patches to know what a gem your wife may be.

[FallenLove]

I just know if there is any trouble, any problems with me, my wife is always with me and for me, when all relatives, best friends and associates left you. Isn't it enough to know this one thing?

You have to experience bad patches to know what a gem your wife may be.

Well said bro.
But again, it's just human nature never to be contented....

[carloe]

At home, I am committed and responsible to my family. It's like my family is 90% of me and playing outside is 10%.
Bottom line: you are not alone. Whatever you do, family always comes first.
sigh. misery loves company. but like what you said, family comes first, inspite of all the cheonging.

[Wizrd]

.

Been there done that...

Now that I have cleared up my divorce...even if people torture me, I will never marry again...not for love...not for money...and surely not for HDB....

No way, no how...not in this life time...

Right now...I have a girlfriend in Jakarta...a girlfriend in Bangkok and a girlfriend in Hainan...none of them will nag me or demand things from me because they know they will never hear from me again...I'm aiming to hook a girlfriend in Australia in the next few months..

I am happy...I see my kids occasionally and they are happy...I am kinda friendly with my ex wife though the baggage and pain over the years made sure that we can never conncect like before ever again...nor do I wish to...

I can do pretty much anything I want and yet...I don't cheong (well, only if I am visiting a new country to announce my arrival...and usually only once..)...I seldom drink...I only DIY once, maybe twice in the last 2 years...I stopped gambling because now my money is MY money to lose...

My only vice is to befriend comely young women and accidently have sex with them....and I try to limit that to once a week...
No one to check on my movement...or my bank account...or if I am eating too much meat....no one to tell me it's time to go home or to go to bed..and no one to complain when I leave the toilet seat up...(ok...when my daughters come to visit me, they comnplain...but I love my kids...what is a man to do??)


Note to all who are not married or are about to get divorced...DO NOT GET MARRIED (again)...you will have so much more sex and fun if you choose to stay single...:cool:


.

[maxsee]

Marriage....pros and cos inside it......came across this article..and would like to share it with our bros out there...this essay though is written for america is also applicable for singapore...

http://www.edmecka.com/blogs/dont-marry-essay---why-marriage-has-become-a-raw-deal-for-men.html

End of the day, life is about choices...not all marriage are bad...just as not all marriage are good.....:D:D:D

[Sen5eS]

Note to all who are not married or are about to get divorced...DO NOT GET MARRIED (again)...you will have so much more sex and fun if you choose to stay single...:cool:

Bro ... you sound kinda sore from it all ... but takes 2 hands to clap ... 1 man's meat is another man's poison ;) Hope you accomplish your KPIs :D

[tikokeong]

I just know if there is any trouble, any problems with me, my wife is always with me and for me, when all relatives, best friends and associates left you. Isn't it enough to know this one thing?

You have to experience bad patches to know what a gem your wife may be.

Yup, support what bro said.

Only experience the worse part in your life you will now how good a wife will be.

[Wizrd]

Bro ... you sound kinda sore from it all ... but takes 2 hands to clap ... 1 man's meat is another man's poison ;) Hope you accomplish your KPIs :D

Thanks bro...

Yeah...I'm still kinda kicking myself...I wasted 6 years hanging on hoping for the best...I lost 6 years!!!

If only I had the courage to pull the plug earlier....sigh...


But all is good now!! ;)


.

[Sen5eS]

Thanks bro...

Yeah...I'm still kinda kicking myself...I wasted 6 years hanging on hoping for the best...I lost 6 years!!!

If only I had the courage to pull the plug earlier....sigh...

But all is good now!! ;)

.

Pull the plug earlier ? if only we all knew what's best for us hahaha :D
Was it all bad the entire 6 yrs ? :)

[Wizrd]

Pull the plug earlier ? if only we all knew what's best for us hahaha :D
Was it all bad the entire 6 yrs ? :)

Yeah bro...I still shiver when I recall those 6 years...the first 5 years of marriage was pretty good....then it went downhill and what a steep downhill it was...

I felt I was treated like a servant...must keep things exactly the way she liked it...ordered to do this and do that....work hard to earn money but all spent on different kinds of cream and make up and women shoes and clothes, her things are always essential but mine are all luxury that we should skip...Try to save some money in my own account also kenna questioned about which bimbo I am saving money for...

Have to fetach the kids here and there when the car was bought for her...work late means cold shoulder but when she stays late for work means I must be understanding...I go out with friends means world war 3...if I ask the maid to do something in a pleasant voice, she will ask me why so nice to the maid...am I banging her??

No sex on offer and even after begging, no guarantee can get any...forget to text her means I don't care about her...forget to tell her where I am means I must with be other girls...if I am horny means I am a pervert who only cares about sex...

Argument with logic means I'm trying to trick her...but she can be sarcastic whenever she wants to be...her favourite words were always she should divorce me as there are many better men outside...

When with family or friends, always loud voice soft voice at me...eyes rolling and head shaking at almost everything I did...

KNN...I stayed for the kids but eventually after 6 years of shit...enough was enough...I decided that 11 years of marriage meant nothing to me anymore...

So, on the next time she threatened me with divorce again...I accepted and said...ON! I will find a lawyer tomorrow. I will pay for it....goodnight...and left the house...


It's been many years since and I have never been happier...I saved money that I couldn't imagine saving before...even after paying monthly maintenance to her and the kids...and even when I have a few girlfriends all over Asia which I have to visit...(how did she spend this much money before???)

It was a nightmare bro...and I am so happy that I finally woke up from it...

I do not remember how it got to that point...she was the most timid, sweetest thing before marriage...even my mother said to me that she was afraid that I will bully her if we got married...I guess I eventually paid the price for living like a king before I married her...


Oh well...lesson learnt...no matter how sweet and subservient and obidient a girl is now when she is with me...I am NOT going to marry her...because I know...the monster will come out to play once I am a husband...boyfriend always has the say!!!
:D

As a husband...have no speaking right...plus beg and beg still end up PCC in the toilet...
As a boyfriend...always hear 'it's up to you dear'...plus sex in the afternoon...another session at night...morning still get offered a quickie...and occasionally...for no reason whatsoever...get a BJ just for walking by her to go get a beer from the fridge...

Na bei bro...why do I want to be married??:cool:


.

.

[sane]

Yeah bro...I still shiver when I recall those 6 years...the first 5 years of marriage was pretty good....
Na bei bro...why do I want to be married??:cool:
.

At least first 5yrs good mah and she bore u 2 lovely kids. Now good lo, freedom :D

[Sen5eS]

maybe it's post pregnancy depression? shit happens really fast and out of the blue?

[Wizrd]

At least first 5yrs good mah and she bore u 2 lovely kids. Now good lo, freedom


:) Hi Sane...

Hahaha...7 good years actually...then 2 not-too-bad years...(must include courtship days right?)...then 6 years of hell...:(

And we have 3 wonderful kids...:D

....Yup...all good now...and she's really pleasant to me now when I visit the kids...but all the emotional baggage cannot be erased...no problems...life moved on and I'm happy again...that's the important part...:)


.

[Wizrd]

maybe it's post pregnancy depression? shit happens really fast and out of the blue?


No bro...

People change...not right or wrong but her priorities shifted...

Looking from the outside, I can understand it better...but there is no meaning for me to be the one to suffer right?

I guess I thought that being a good husband means giving in to her...and over time...her bad habits developed and gotten worse...until her mind murdered the woman I married...
I'm sure I've changed too...so...instead of two people being miserable together...better be miserable apart...and hey...being apart isn't miserable for me at all...;)


It's ok now...I'm never getting into that trap again...so it's all good...:)


.


.

[maxsee]

In today's context...it is best to maintain a boyfriend girlfriend relationship instead of walking into a marriage...in this way, if things dun work out...either party can still walk out in one piece...:D:D:D

[Sen5eS]

No bro...

People change...not right or wrong but her priorities shifted...

Looking from the outside, I can understand it better...but there is no meaning for me to be the one to suffer right?

I guess I thought that being a good husband means giving in to her...and over time...her bad habits developed and gotten worse...until her mind murdered the woman I married...
I'm sure I've changed too...so...instead of two people being miserable together...better be miserable apart...and hey...being apart isn't miserable for me at all...;)

It's ok now...I'm never getting into that trap again...so it's all good...:)

.

You have a point there ... but the main thing is you did your best (from what I see) and if it's not going to work out, the next best thing is transition into change ... being apart may not be so bad and being alone might be a good thing for you to "re-center" yourself ...

hehehe Giving in is not always a good thing to do hahaha well ... i don't know any better myself hahahaha maybe it's just taking each other for granted ... but i think hormones might be the culprit hahaha

U try asking her if she regretted marrying you or if you have been "lacking" as a husband the day 1 of your child gets married hahahaa

Only time will tell.

[Hantu69]

:) Hi Sane...

Hahaha...7 good years actually...then 2 not-too-bad years...(must include courtship days right?)...then 6 years of hell...:(

And we have 3 wonderful kids...:D

....Yup...all good now...and she's really pleasant to me now when I visit the kids...but all the emotional baggage cannot be erased...no problems...life moved on and I'm happy again...that's the important part...:)


.

thanks for sharing ur story, upz u bro.

[Hantu69]

You have a point there ... but the main thing is you did your best (from what I see) and if it's not going to work out, the next best thing is transition into change ... being apart may not be so bad and being alone might be a good thing for you to "re-center" yourself ...

hehehe Giving in is not always a good thing to do hahaha well ... i don't know any better myself hahahaha maybe it's just taking each other for granted ... but i think hormones might be the culprit hahaha

U try asking her if she regretted marrying you or if you have been "lacking" as a husband the day 1 of your child gets married hahahaa

Only time will tell.

Well said bro, will up you soon.

[Wizrd]

Only time will tell.

No need to revisit the past bro....

Time has already told and I'm having a blast...

Cheers bro...:)


thanks for sharing ur story, upz u bro.

Thanks bro for your upzz...

Don't fear the separation bro...it should be called the liberation...

Your life from now will become fun-filled if you stop dwelling in the past...

Best of luck bro...


.

[wells]

What to do? We choose this road. I'm married..and it really alot of things that we need to give way or sometimes the feeling is like giving her a choke slam and shout "that it"!

Reply me loudly, talk to me loudly infront of friends or her families, house must arrange like her way, small gas, she wants shopping or want buy things are her piority. Me go outside watching EPL football her face will be like fuc, msg me during work and no reply - meaning ignoring her. End of tired working day go home still have to bear with it. Always tell myself to talk tactfully.

haiz...it will come to a point that if my respect to you is not appreciate, the day when i take back the respect would be the day we will end everything.

sorry talk too much, i feel all bros having silent cries for this issue. Lan Lan bite bullet and move on.

[Sen5eS]

No need to revisit the past bro....
Time has already told and I'm having a blast...
Cheers bro...:)
Thanks bro for your upzz...

Don't fear the separation bro...it should be called the liberation...
Your life from now will become fun-filled if you stop dwelling in the past...
Best of luck bro....

hehehe liberation :D sounds good hahaha well ... not dwelling ... just a thought that makes you wonder ... what if ...

[Sen5eS]

What to do? We choose this road. I'm married..and it really alot of things that we need to give way or sometimes the feeling is like giving her a choke slam and shout "that it"!

Reply me loudly, talk to me loudly infront of friends or her families, house must arrange like her way, small gas, she wants shopping or want buy things are her piority. Me go outside watching EPL football her face will be like fuc, msg me during work and no reply - meaning ignoring her. End of tired working day go home still have to bear with it. Always tell myself to talk tactfully.

haiz...it will come to a point that if my respect to you is not appreciate, the day when i take back the respect would be the day we will end everything.

sorry talk too much, i feel all bros having silent cries for this issue. Lan Lan bite bullet and move on.

Venting out is good ... but perhaps she might need to know about it? if she doesn't give a hoot ... then liberation is at hand hahaha :p

[Wizrd]

What to do? We choose this road. I'm married..and it really alot of things that we need to give way or sometimes the feeling is like giving her a choke slam and shout "that it"!

Reply me loudly, talk to me loudly infront of friends or her families, house must arrange like her way, small gas, she wants shopping or want buy things are her piority. Me go outside watching EPL football her face will be like fuc, msg me during work and no reply - meaning ignoring her. End of tired working day go home still have to bear with it. Always tell myself to talk tactfully.

haiz...it will come to a point that if my respect to you is not appreciate, the day when i take back the respect would be the day we will end everything.

sorry talk too much, i feel all bros having silent cries for this issue. Lan Lan bite bullet and move on.


Bro...

Yes you chose...it was your choice...

But the wonderful thing about life is...you can keep on choosing....no one said you choose once, and if wrong...must lan lan bear with it all your life??

Even if they said that, does not mean you must follow it....

Talk to her...tell her how you feell...and if she really does not care...maybe you don't need to care how she feels either....

Respect is a two way street...why show respect to someone who obviously does not respect you back??

I understand that it is scary to force the issue because the future is an unknown to us...but your known world is not very acceptable to you right now...should you not do something about it?

Really bro...talk to her..and tell her that you are fed up...if you and she cannot work out a solution...then it is time to find your own happiness...


Best of luck bro...


.

[Santaclaws]

ARE YOU WITH THE RIGHT PARTNER?

During a seminar, a woman asked," How do I know if I am with the right person?"

The author then noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so he said, "It depends. Is that your partner?" In all seriousness, she answered "How do you know?" Let me answer this question because the chances are good that it's weighing on your mind replied the author.

Here's the answer.

Every relationship has a cycle… In the beginning; you
fall in love with your partner. You anticipate their calls,
want their touch, and like their idiosyncrasies. Falling in love wasn't hard. In fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn't have to DO anything. That's why it's called "falling" in love.

People in love sometimes say, "I was swept off my feet. "Picture the expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something happened TO YOU.

Falling in love is a passive and spontaneous experience. But after a few months or years of being together, the euphoria of love fades. It's a natural cycle of EVERY relationship.

Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts. The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship; you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.

At this point, you and/or your partner might start asking, "Am I with the right person?" And as you reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you
may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when relationships breakdown.

The key to succeeding in a relationship is not finding the right person; it's learning to love the person you found.

People blame their partners for their unhappiness and look outside for fulfillment. Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes.

Infidelity is the most common. But sometimes people turn to work, a hobby, friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances. But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your relationship. It lies within it.

I'm not saying that you couldn't fall in love with someone else. You could. And TEMPORARILY you'd feel better. But you'd be in the same situation a few years later.

Because, the key to succeeding in a Relationship is not finding the right person; it's learning to love the Person you found.

SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. You have to work on it day in and day out. It takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it demands WISDOM. You have to know
WHAT TO DO to make it work.

Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do (with or without your partner), Just as there are physical laws Of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. If you know how to apply these laws, the results are predictable.

Love is therefore a "decision". Not just a feeling.

[furritales]

Its the syndrome of "the grass is always greener on the other side" ;)
And then you start climbing over the fence going over to that field...... After spending some time in that field you start to notice another field whose grass seems greener..... and so on ...... :D

As long as we are never contented with what we have the search will never ends.

[maxsee]

If you want the grass to be forever green...just refrains from getting married....otherwise stop looking over your shoulder and drool over the greener patch of pasture and be contented with your current patch of grass....:D:D:D:D

[Greenfrog]

If you want the grass to be forever green...just refrains from getting married....otherwise stop looking over your shoulder and drool over the greener patch of pasture and be contented with your current patch of grass....:D:D:D:D

Well said.. i think a lot of modern couples falls into the category "为了结婚而结婚“ only to end up with the wrong guy/girl for years.

[leaseoflife]

Statistically... i dare say more than half of us goons (me included) stayed on because of our kids. So we lan lan swallow the unhappiness and go thru life... and a double life.

I always find solace whenever i travel because i will be me again. Totally just me. It gets worse if you get a great gfe from a warm body every morning in your room. And i hate it when the wheels of the plane touches the ground of our changi airport. And i loathe it when they say..welcome home. Kns. :P

If given a chance... will i make a different decision. Yes i would. That said... i also still love my wife.. but i hate the restraints. I think she feels it sometime too.. but same thing..for the kids. So..who knows.. maybewhen the kids are old enough.. both of us can be given a hall pass. That wld be a perfect ending.

[Greenfrog]

Statistically... i dare say more than half of us goons (me included) stayed on because of our kids. So we lan lan swallow the unhappiness and go thru life... and a double life.

I always find solace whenever i travel because i will be me again. Totally just me. It gets worse if you get a great gfe from a warm body every morning in your room. And i hate it when the wheels of the plane touches the ground of our changi airport. And i loathe it when they say..welcome home. Kns. :P

If given a chance... will i make a different decision. Yes i would. That said... i also still love my wife.. but i hate the restraints. I think she feels it sometime too.. but same thing..for the kids. So..who knows.. maybewhen the kids are old enough.. both of us can be given a hall pass. That wld be a perfect ending.
So bro, are you trying to advise to all the brothers that don't get married? :)

[Wizrd]

If given a chance... will i make a different decision. Yes i would. That said... i also still love my wife.. but i hate the restraints. I think she feels it sometime too.. but same thing..for the kids. So..who knows.. maybewhen the kids are old enough.. both of us can be given a hall pass. That wld be a perfect ending.


Bro...the chance is always there for change...

Most guys have the same dream and usually it doesn't happen or happens too late in life that its pointless to get a Hall pass because you'll prefer a nap to a fuck by then...

Having a dream is well and good bro...but if we just sit on our dreams and not do anything about it...they will just stay as dreams...

Best of luck bro...

.

[ObjCoder]

Statistically... i dare say more than half of us goons (me included) stayed on because of our kids.

We stay on because of our kids, who gave us a kind of joy and blissfulness that cannot be found anywhere else.

The irony is... the kids are the one that turned the marriage upside down.

The wife didn't change; she's still the same great woman you married. But the situation has changed. With kids, she has lesser time to listen to you, go on dates with you and certainly no energy to have sex with you.

I know how I get here... but I wished things were better. Anyone feels the same?

[anthonyKKW]

We stay on because of our kids, who gave us a kind of joy and blissfulness that cannot be found anywhere else.

The irony is... the kids are the one that turned the marriage upside down.

The wife didn't change; she's still the same great woman you married. But the situation has changed. With kids, she has lesser time to listen to you, go on dates with you and certainly no energy to have sex with you.

I know how I get here... but I wished things were better. Anyone feels the same?


Same same, that's why I sign up this forum and started chionging...now reflecting and cutting down..

[HCKing]

most women will behave more or less the same kinda pattern after marriage. man and woman are wired differently so it's natural to have conflicts under one roof. doesnt mean change and the next one will definitely be better.

[leaseoflife]

So bro, are you trying to advise to all the brothers that don't get married? :)

Nope...just advising to tread with care. :) Marriage has its pros and cons...so it is very much a cost benefit analysis. I totally agree that kids are a blessing but it tends to tilt the balance in marriage. It is never an easy solution to this...and to each his own.

Sometimes we get married for various reasons. Most of the time...it is simply because we thought it is time.

There will be no end to this discussion because every family is different.

[leaseoflife]

So bro, are you trying to advise to all the brothers that don't get married? :)

Bro...the chance is always there for change...

Most guys have the same dream and usually it doesn't happen or happens too late in life that its pointless to get a Hall pass because you'll prefer a nap to a fuck by then...

Having a dream is well and good bro...but if we just sit on our dreams and not do anything about it...they will just stay as dreams...

Best of luck bro...

.

Thanks bro... but at the moment..there is no domestic violence...so still not that bad. Just feel tied up at the moment. For now... it is bearable because i still get my fix when i travel so it is not that bad.

But that said... all the best. I am sure u are enjoying your new found freedom.

[Yumenotameni]

Like you, I do not know why exactly am I here too. Perhaps it was due to boredom or lust? Eitherway, I believe it is okay to chat here and exchange opinions but no further than that, especially if you are already happily married with a wife who is caring.

[fouredz]

Eh... wtf... I'm happily married too...
Also dunno why I'm here... is it human nature to prefer FRESH things? Or just a excuse for myself

[SinDellman]

God was curious when he found out why so many husbands are enjoying themselves in hell and he came down to ask them for the reason.
The answer is the same for all.... After we went through the Hell in our marriages, this place is a heaven. :D