Why do we cheat on our partners???

[fictionman]

Why do i cheat on my wife???...For me, it's because of a few reasons...Firstly, being married to the same woman for 13 years...Yes I must admit I'm bless that my marriage has remain strong all these years but sexually we have drifted apart...The passion in love making is somehow gone...Secondly, being influence by friends...Somehow seeing others having fun outside of their marriage seems so dangerous but exciting at the same time...

Being able to have sex with different women by paying for it or having an affair seems so intresting to me...I always believe I won't be caught so that's why I do it...But I know that's not true coz if I don't cover my tracks well my marriage will come tumbling down...

What are your reasons???

[s7evin]

For me opportunities.

[astronaut]

I never intended to get married because I knew from the start that I still like to play. I was compelled into marriage. After marriage I could not stop playing.

[sta1100]

There is always Reason behind it, wife not giving, family problem etc, but there is temptation it only how you over come it.

[Max77]

wad era already? probably wifes are having fun all along...

when the NEW dream guy(s) came along, its time to change rod, courtesy of singapore's law, its monetarily more wiser to do so anyway.

[lestubbsie]

for me it is the curiousity and thrill of it. nothing more, nothing less

[littlepok]

LSD wife, makes u bored. the extra activities outside makes u a more loving man. however, Rule No. 1: do not ditch your family for anyone outside. even if there is no love, APPRECIATE she went through hard times with u, she deserve every single respect and $ u can afford to pamper her with.

Leave your cum for others, she do not need it anyway

[owl888]

unleashing the beast beneath, every man has it........its either how it was implemented: fantasies like cosplay, 3Ps, gangbangs....etc

[I.m.Jim]

Different man different reasons to cheat. No matter how good the reason, cheating is cheating, don't come out excuses to glorify it. Lust? Lack of understanding and love? Financial Woes? Lack of phyical contact due to sickness and disability? Ego? etc are common reasons for cheating. My two cents worth.

[yang punk]

It's in the nature of men...everything else are just excuses!

We are just like animals with the primeval urge or instinct to mate. But because of our higher intelligence (or stupidity) living in society, we have created all kinds of rules and restrictions to copulate freely!

[Stud00]

Any inputs from sisters?

[tohKiaBee]

ppl with partners gf or wife...
if kenna STD pass to ur loved ones how?

any thoughts abt this bef cheating?

[syt_punisher]

For me, sg woman simply become aunties after marriage, and they are not as sexually active as they grow older?

See the same pussy for many years you not sian meh?

[Gerald Tan]

Whatever the reasons we cheated (or rather call it eat other pussies), we must still put Family & Wife as No. 1 because simply they are our First relative members who will help us when we run into trouble or die....

[Loner08]

I never intended to get married because I knew from the start that I still like to play. I was compelled into marriage. After marriage I could not stop playing.

Same thinking. Having seen people around me going through all these cheating process, marriage is the last thing on my mind. My uncle who has always been boasting his 'ECAs' outside for years after marriage.. later found out that his 'faithful' wife has all along been having FBs outside and his son-in-law repeatedly cheating on his daughter.

[tommylee08]

For me opportunities.

[tabulaRasa]

Doesn't the long-term cheating eat you up inside though? When I 'cheated' in my relationships when I was younger, it was usually a one-off thing - and usually alcohol-induced. I would come clean with it because I could never deal with the guilt. Heh.

I just can't really imagine going through a long-term relationship -worse if it's a marriage - like that. I'd still have to get it off my conscience at some point. haha.

Well, I do see how it might be a thrill on some level though. A kinda secret hidden life. But if you really cared about your partner - just as a person, wouldn't you feel bad? Not so much just the fact that you're getting off with someone else, but the lying/pretending to her face, all the time. Unless you think she knows/doesn't mind on some level.

I reckon if I ever get married, I'd rather he not completely go behind my back to do it. I'd feel so, well, kept in the dark, and stupid? Hahaha.

Is it about sex, or are you guys feeling real feelings for other people?

[spidey7]

It is not consider cheat. Just wanna have fun with different persons. Unfortunately to some others it is not acceptable.

[<<totally>>]

What are your reasons???
Hmm....a few reasons/excuses that I gone through,

1) Woman came knowing at your door front
Can you imagine that image in your head? Those woman that have been only in your mind, suddenly signalling that you are needed. I mean who can resisted that devil calling out and waving at you.

2)The 1 in the million that attracts you mentally, physically and spiritually.
This type of attraction do not happened often, the woman might be real normal looking. But had the magic of making you keep thinking of her and secretly trying to get closer to her.

3)Woman that has an attitude problem
This might be the type of fetish for guys with ego. All woman has a weakness for something, once being able to break that line of defense she will be all yours. Examples: Lady bosses, rich man's daughter..etc Having her to beg you for more is 100% ego enriching.

4)Quarrels with wife/gf
This is the most common thing that happen to everyone. I normally have the habit to keep quiet and let her go rattling. When she is done, I will say things needed to be completed at work. Go any places quiet to drink alone. Things may happened or may not. If that lustful worm got awaken by the alcohol, then finding a hole will be needed.

I think that is what I can offered.:D

[SeniSeis]

thinking of having the thrill of having 3some and multiple partners.. but too hum ji to try

[samuser]

i think for me is the thrill. my 2 cents worth. :)

[sgjoey]

Don't even call it cheating.

It's a nature thing.

Humans are genetically hardwired to seek sexual variety.

Nature -- isn't that the best reason ever? :D

[xxFTOxx]

Same thinking. Having seen people around me going through all these cheating process, marriage is the last thing on my mind. My uncle who has always been boasting his 'ECAs' outside for years after marriage.. later found out that his 'faithful' wife has all along been having FBs outside and his son-in-law repeatedly cheating on his daughter.

Karma lolz

[fictionman]

Leave your cum for others, she do not need it anyway[/QUOTE]

What a powerful statement!!!!

[deludedgal]

i think its the sex... if u had a good one before.. u will find it sad to have a bad one all the time.

[luv2suck]

well said, u r so profound in your thought... luv dat abt u. remind me so much of my own bf. dat's why we are not marrying and we both agree to be in an open relationship. smooch

It's in the nature of men...everything else are just excuses!

We are just like animals with the primeval urge or instinct to mate. But because of our higher intelligence (or stupidity) living in society, we have created all kinds of rules and restrictions to copulate freely!

[Anel King]

Hi Bros

I went to Reservist recently and were exchanging views with my buddies on eating out.

One bro said something very true," Your wife is not a Sex object. She's your love, Wife & mother to your kids. You have sex with here when both of you need the sex. Especially her. When you need it, fulfill you sexual fantasies with the other girls out there."

I did find this pretty true on one hand.

Some of the other buddies had different views. Most would eat out almost every week. While others had girlfriends/FBs.

Just my 2 cents.

[W1ck3dSecret]

Feelings ain't same anymore.
Curiosity and exploration come along.

A guy friend ever told me 妻不如妾， 妾不如 .... ..... Oops cannot remember.

[chnhubby71]

Bro each of us have a different view to this.

We love each others in married and in life.

We build our family and fortune from scratch when both of us are poor.

Times came when we have a fortune of today and our sex life becomes BORED that can be understood thru OLD age, stress and tiredness at times due to our workload or family life to take care of our kids and errand.

But that is not the excuse to EAT out and put the blame to our MRS.

If we do have a CHOICE, I would not mind to drink the MILK but will never INTEND to bring the COW back home.

Everyone do have his GOOD and BAD times when comes to family and SEX at times, try to talk it out and have a MUTUAL agreement rather than throw away a GREAT family and Fortune when both of you starts to enjoy till OLD Age.

Wish you and your MRS have a peaceful and enjoyable life thru your marriage and happy family.

Cheer!!!!!!

[sexresearcher]

It is human nature for men to 'spread his seeds'. We in modern societies today artificially created rules, boundaries and the most distinct one being marriage to stop the chaos that will befall on us if we are to f as many as we like.

I do believe in one true love which I why I ultimately marry the girl who I am seeing for quite a few years. Nature over rules, rules over nature. Its a tough fight.

Being over 30, it is harder as I am quite in love with bachelorhood. Many times I tried to stop playing outside, visiting pros, escorts. It is so hard. Knn.

I am really wondering I will ever change. My friends think I will not.

[Alf1977]

Guys cheat on women .. Women must also cheat on men to be fair. To play safe, better to use CDs when doing with wives/husbands, one never know if that "faithful-looking" wife/husband is eating outside without your knowledge.

To women I must say, don't be an aunt after marriage, learn to love yourself and doll up to stay attractive to other men...if one day your husband eat out (9 out of 10 men do that) you will also not be left out and can revenge by enjoying yourself with other men.. An eye for an eye n you won't feel so hurt!

[spidey7]

There is always Reason behind it, wife not giving, family problem etc, but there is temptation it only how you over come it.

Agreed w sta1100 dere is a reason for everythg. Dis includes callg FL. Sumtimes diff 2explain.

[Sylarzz]

Humans are never satisfied. Once they hv achieve something (gf/ wife), they will get bored and want to look for new excitement/ spark in life.

Pple cheat coz they cannt resist the temptation outside. "Outside flowers are beautiful".
It is very RARE tat a guy is 100% faithful to his gf/wife. At any point in his life, he surely been to the dark side.

But always rem to wipe ur mouth clean clean before going home. Dun hurt innocent parties coz of ur own desire and failure to control. And rem to go home as home is the most comforting place you can ever have.

My 2 cents worth.

[Secret7]

You say men can cheat is ok. 9 of 10. Are you sure or not? Many love their wives as they should. Not all men are cheaters.

If you stray, you must also accept your wife can look for people outside marriage. Can many of you accept this? What if your wife fuck by bangala then you come back and fuck the same hole. Can accept or not?

Also if bangala can make your wife song song 5 times and you cannot, she prefer outside food, you must accept also.

[Alf1977]

Secret7, yes if not 8 out of 10 definitely cheat on their wives.. If my wife love bangala hv to admit that wife love longer D.. It is hard to taste the same hole that has been used by a bangala!

The same theory, will u drink the bowl of soup knowing that someone has spat saliva n phelgm in it, mixing it well before serving u? Yucks!

Guess some times it's best not to know what your wives been doing us or you will lose appetite in the "dish" forever. Even when the bowl been thoroughly washed and sterilised, when u see the same soup in the same bowl, thoughts of saliva/phlegm in it will pop in your mind .. And the experience of drinking that soup will never ever be the same again.

[Mindy]

Secret7, yes if not 8 out of 10 definitely cheat on their wives.. If my wife love bangala hv to admit that wife love longer D.. It is hard to taste the same hole that has been used by a bangala!

The same theory, will u drink the bowl of soup knowing that someone has spat saliva n phelgm in it, mixing it well before serving u? Yucks!

Guess some times it's best not to know what your wives been doing us or you will lose appetite in the "dish" forever. Even when the bowl been thoroughly washed and sterilised, when u see the same soup in the same bowl, thoughts of saliva/phlegm in it will pop in your mind .. And the experience of drinking that soup will never ever be the same again.

Cant dont use this type of analogy or not? it is disgusting no matter which angle you look at it.

I agree with your point in a way but in a liberated society where women and men have equal economic opportunity, sexual awareness and needs of both gender has to find expression somewhere. I think it is the duty of both wife and husband to explore each other sexuality to find an equilibrium in their life. Making one cum is not the end all be all.

In a relationship, we spend a lot of effort to fuss over our kids, the renovation, the holidays and colour of the new car ectera ectera. But we seldom look within and ask what we actually want. We give ourselves to our family which is not wrong in the first place. But in doing so, we maybe neglecting something that is more basic like our sexual need.

When we have needs and if this need is not in tandem with our partner, especially taboo one like sexual fulfillment we look elsewhere instead of sitting down and discuss with our spouse. I know it is a taboo but we have to start somewhere. I rather try and fail than taking the easy way out.

A lot of people asked me what's my motive here since i am a gal and am not looking for a fling. I guess this is it. I like to learn from others' experience and sharing. i like to know the male psyche. at least now i know some men distill the sexual expression to saliva and phlegm in a bowl. how enlightening! :D

[DO_YOU_BJ]

Cant dont use this type of analogy or not? it is disgusting no matter which angle you look at it.

I agree with your point in a way but in a liberated society where women and men have equal economic opportunity, sexual awareness and needs of both gender has to find expression somewhere. I think it is the duty of both wife and husband to explore each other sexuality to find an equilibrium in their life. Making one cum is not the end all be all.

In a relationship, we spend a lot of effort to fuss over our kids, the renovation, the holidays and colour of the new car ectera ectera. But we seldom look within and ask what we actually want. We give ourselves to our family which is not wrong in the first place. But in doing so, we maybe neglecting something that is more basic like our sexual need.

When we have needs and if this need is not in tandem with our partner, especially taboo one like sexual fulfillment we look elsewhere instead of sitting down and discuss with our spouse. I know it is a taboo but we have to start somewhere. I rather try and fail than taking the easy way out.

A lot of people asked me what's my motive here since i am a gal and am not looking for a fling. I guess this is it. I like to learn from others' experience and sharing. i like to know the male psyche. at least now i know some men distill the sexual expression to saliva and phlegm in a bowl. how enlightening! :D

How 1 expresses his or her views is not important.
The important thing is whether the reader has the intelligence to grasp the moral of that expression.
So, look outside of the well, stop ewwwwwing n learn to read.
U try very hard to portray intelligence but every time u get so carried away on the keyboard u drop an egg:rolleyes:

[xavier_x]

Affair is shiok but dangerous. Anyway, it's not just the men cheating now... I had an affair with my ex-gf from 2010 to 2012. She is already married with another man and have a kid, but I still enjoyed bonking her. Sometimes I quite pity her husband and child when I think of it, cos the wife / mum is fucking another guy outside... But when I was bonking her, I felt shiok, especially having the thought that I was bonking someone else's wife. And I felt even more shiok when I asked her to swallow all my cum and she listened to what I told her to do... As she couldn't really meet me after work, I will always chiong to her office at the west during lunch time, then chiong to the nearest Fragrance hotel at NUS area, and bonked her for an hour, then drove her back to her office asap... Having such affair excites me but has the fear of getting caught. In the end I chose to end this secret relationship...

To compare affair to bonking prostitutes... Affair will definitely feel nicer. But bonking a prostitute is pay, fuck, forget, and never keep in touch relationship. It will be safer but there will always have a risk of getting STI, STD, or even HIV. Normally I will not RTF a prostitute cos I like to try different gals... The more, the merrier. Haha. Got to try a local girl who does freelance photoshoot in Sg. She always appear in car shows, computer shows, etc. A few bros posted her photos in this forum too (Can find in this thread http://www.sammyboyforum.com/showthread.php?t=239375 ). She has very nice figure and big boobs. But it was like bonking a dead fish on the bed... and her pussy stink! But then she is working at Canada now (Not sure if you guys know who she is... hehe).... So bonking a FL allows you to have many choices, but you might not enjoy the sex.... :D


Why do i cheat on my wife???...For me, it's because of a few reasons...Firstly, being married to the same woman for 13 years...Yes I must admit I'm bless that my marriage has remain strong all these years but sexually we have drifted apart...The passion in love making is somehow gone...Secondly, being influence by friends...Somehow seeing others having fun outside of their marriage seems so dangerous but exciting at the same time...

Being able to have sex with different women by paying for it or having an affair seems so intresting to me...I always believe I won't be caught so that's why I do it...But I know that's not true coz if I don't cover my tracks well my marriage will come tumbling down...

What are your reasons???

[flowbow]

Curious about how you guys would feel if it were your wives/gfs posting all these replies and comments. Seems to me like some bros are just trying to justify them cheating on their partners... Does it absolve the guilt? :confused:

I know for a fact that it would hurt me deeply if I were to read my bf/husband's comment or reply in one of the posts above. Then again, I don't know if it's right to say that guys are less emotional and hence are able to fuck and forget, and still go home to fuck their own gfs/wives without any trace of guilt at all.

I wouldn't be able to do that for sure.

Towards the end of my last relationship, I found myself thinking of another guy while in bed with my bf. My mind was in a whirl and I couldn't force myself to do it with him anymore. I cut the session short and went out for a smoke, all the while mind fucking myself. :( after that, sex with him just wasn't the same anymore and we broke up shortly after.

[DO_YOU_BJ]

Towards the end of my last relationship, I found myself thinking of another guy while in bed with my bf. My mind was in a whirl and I couldn't force myself to do it with him anymore. I cut the session short and went out for a smoke, all the while mind fucking myself. :( after that, sex with him just wasn't the same anymore and we broke up shortly after.
When men cheat, wat r they labelled as?
When women cheat, wat r they labelled as?
Who has a stronger stigma attached to them if they're ever exposed?
Also, fucking is just an act.
It's the emotional attachment n sense of responsibility tat matters the most.
Ur not even 25, maybe when u mature more my dear, it'll all come to u.
Those tat dun get it, just end up being shared used n left to rot in the end;)
As we grow older, our needs our priorities also change.

[flowbow]

Also, fucking is just an act.

Just like how you would not judge a book by its cover, please. Don't judge me by my age.

True enough that fucking is just an act but I'm just curious to know how the bros here would feel if these posts/replies were written by their wives/gfs instead. If you think your reasons are justified because you feel that your wives/gfs can't satisfy you, haven't you thought that maybe you're not the one satisfying her well enough for her to want her to satisfy you instead?

I always find it sad when I think about the poor girls who cook for their partners, do their laundry and duly wait for their bfs/husbands to come home everyday while their partners are out there fucking FLs/flings/FBs. Of course I understand having to see the same face everyday and getting sick of it, but is that a justifiable reason to make love to another girl whom you probably don't even love? I don't know, you could say that fucking and making love are two different terms, but to me it is the same act. And I'd feel sad and disappointed to know that the guy I love is fucking another girl outside.

And yes, I know that there are girls who also fuck around behind their partners' backs... So all that I mentioned above works both ways. :D

[callmebad]

right now, I don't have this problem, because I don't need to be responsible to anyone
but if one day,I have a woman, I'm not sure if I will fuck another woman, it will be to a great extent depending on my overall health condition, whether cock can still stand

[Alf1977]

Cant dont use this type of analogy or not? it is disgusting no matter which angle you look at it.

I agree with your point in a way but in a liberated society where women and men have equal economic opportunity, sexual awareness and needs of both gender has to find expression somewhere. I think it is the duty of both wife and husband to explore each other sexuality to find an equilibrium in their life. Making one cum is not the end all be all.

In a relationship, we spend a lot of effort to fuss over our kids, the renovation, the holidays and colour of the new car ectera ectera. But we seldom look within and ask what we actually want. We give ourselves to our family which is not wrong in the first place. But in doing so, we maybe neglecting something that is more basic like our sexual need.

When we have needs and if this need is not in tandem with our partner, especially taboo one like sexual fulfillment we look elsewhere instead of sitting down and discuss with our spouse. I know it is a taboo but we have to start somewhere. I rather try and fail than taking the easy way out.

A lot of people asked me what's my motive here since i am a gal and am not looking for a fling. I guess this is it. I like to learn from others' experience and sharing. i like to know the male psyche. at least now i know some men distill the sexual expression to saliva and phlegm in a bowl. how enlightening! :D

If One day u found out that your husband did raw with geylang most sought after prostitute, you will definitely think twice to suck his manhood which has been inserted in the loose hole of that prostitute.. Will u enjoy the lollipop deed like before? I bet it will taste/feel the same again!!!

[Alf1977]

Just like how you would not judge a book by its cover, please. Don't judge me by my age.

True enough that fucking is just an act but I'm just curious to know how the bros here would feel if these posts/replies were written by their wives/gfs instead. If you think your reasons are justified because you feel that your wives/gfs can't satisfy you, haven't you thought that maybe you're not the one satisfying her well enough for her to want her to satisfy you instead?

I always find it sad when I think about the poor girls who cook for their partners, do their laundry and duly wait for their bfs/husbands to come home everyday while their partners are out there fucking FLs/flings/FBs. Of course I understand having to see the same face everyday and getting sick of it, but is that a justifiable reason to make love to another girl whom you probably don't even love? I don't know, you could say that fucking and making love are two different terms, but to me it is the same act. And I'd feel sad and disappointed to know that the guy I love is fucking another girl outside.

And yes, I know that there are girls who also fuck around behind their partners' backs... So all that I mentioned above works both ways. :D

So the smartest way for you to do is not spend so much time with your husband and try to have fun with other guy besides your husband .. The guilt in you will make you a better wife .. Or if one day you realise your husband been eating outside, you know inside your heart, you also play outside and won't feel like dying or 1000x Hurt... I know most women could not take it if their husbands fool outside ... So In order to be in the game, play harder than him .. Just remember women are borned to be fucked and men are borned to fuck women ..the best way to deal with cheat is to cheat back.

[DO_YOU_BJ]

right now, I don't have this problem, because I don't need to be responsible to anyone
but if one day,I have a woman, I'm not sure if I will fuck another woman, it will be to a great extent depending on my overall health condition, whether cock can still stand
Good reply.
So, dun be too eager to say NO I WON'T.
Many married folks male or female all said that prior tying the knot only to realise later, that, actually, these flings sometimes help their marriage.
Of cos, these do not include all those 逃避鬼 who use this as an escape cos they regretted marry their wives or husbands blah blah
So like the old man always say, dun say too fast too soon, cross the bridge, u dun wanna know wanna act blur oso cannot liao.
But haven't cross the bridge, say so much also premature;)

[Rickey]

Humans are never satisfied. Once they hv achieve something (gf/ wife), they will get bored and want to look for new excitement/ spark in life.

Pple cheat coz they cannt resist the temptation outside. "Outside flowers are beautiful".
It is very RARE tat a guy is 100% faithful to his gf/wife. At any point in his life, he surely been to the dark side.

But always rem to wipe ur mouth clean clean before going home. Dun hurt innocent parties coz of ur own desire and failure to control. And rem to go home as home is the most comforting place you can ever have.

My 2 cents worth.
You say men can cheat is ok. 9 of 10. Are you sure or not? Many love their wives as they should. Not all men are cheaters.

If you stray, you must also accept your wife can look for people outside marriage. Can many of you accept this? What if your wife fuck by bangala then you come back and fuck the same hole. Can accept or not?

Also if bangala can make your wife song song 5 times and you cannot, she prefer outside food, you must accept also.

Secret7, yes if not 8 out of 10 definitely cheat on their wives.. If my wife love bangala hv to admit that wife love longer D.. It is hard to taste the same hole that has been used by a bangala!

The same theory, will u drink the bowl of soup knowing that someone has spat saliva n phelgm in it, mixing it well before serving u? Yucks!

Guess some times it's best not to know what your wives been doing us or you will lose appetite in the "dish" forever. Even when the bowl been thoroughly washed and sterilised, when u see the same soup in the same bowl, thoughts of saliva/phlegm in it will pop in your mind .. And the experience of drinking that soup will never ever be the same again.
Agree somewat wif bro Sylarzz's views but not totally...his views applies to guys who already hv wives who really love them n does everything for their husbands n the family including doing their best to perform their conjugal roles to satisfy their Hbs sexually as best they can...Yes, most guys are like dat, the pastures over the other side always look greener to them...so the sooner the wives n ladies realise tis, the beta for them..so tat they, using tis knowledge can perhaps do something to help pull their hubbies back to themselves..depending on wat the issues or the 'push away ' factors are betw them which varies frm couple to couple ..

but there are also another group of husbands in significant numbers who are forced into the arms of other women by their uncaring, insensitive, n domineering wives...imho, it is definitely unfair to label this group of HBs as wife cheaters...

n lol, vice versa, the reverse situation can happen oso...the wives cheating on their husbands which according to a very recent news report is growing in worrying numbers here in sg, most of them arising out of loneliness due to Hbs busy working n not spending enough time wif them or when their husbands are away on work assignments..n all husbands need to be aware of tis trend n take the necessary damage control measures if they are affected like wat the wives need to do as mentioned above...jus my 3 cents worth of tots..

[Alf1977]

I guess when the right opportunities come knocking on your door at the right time when you have the urge or lust, we cheat on our partners. The thrill of ONS with a stranger, the fling with a married woman can spice up our boring sex lives most of the times .. Years of playing with women, when I realise my partner cheated on me, its still hard to swallow it down or accept the fact that she cheats too. Retribution!

How many bros here cheat on your gfs/wives and end up realise that your gfs/wives have been cheating behind your back?

[JikoBong]

For me, my wife is not the one i love most. The woman i love most has wild personalities, totally unsuitable for being wife and family builder. When i look at my wife, I see a very thoughtful and caring family member. There is more affinity than love sparks. :o

So this might be a reason why i visit FL stables. I like the thrill of fucking women that i only seen once. Sometimes when there is chemistry between me and the FL, the gfe sparks is even more exciting. :D

Btw, i had the hpv immunization. This makes me immune to viruses that cause 80% of the genital wart cases. These genital warts can cause cervical cancer in women. So i had the vaccination to try prevent catching hpv and spreading it to wife. By the way, hpv spreads even when you wear condom.

Just my 2 cents worth here.

[Scanner]

From the read, I gather that most of us recognize the importance of the family for those who are married/ with kids. But somehow there's a disjoint between that and being totally faithful to the core. I'm sure there are men out there who are fully committed to their wives - for various reasons, that they are by nature a committed husband, no exposure or simply no money to play. Then again in this society, these are the exceptions rather than the norm. And they have my utmost respect because they can do what I have tried so hard to but always fail.

My take is that men's characters are naturally inclined to "evil", just my take ok - dun be offended. So any temptations will cause one to succumb, some may need none! I remember how at one stage of my life long time ago when I was an exception, until things spiralled out of control. To this day, I'm still trying to right the wrongs, to walk away, maybe not as hard as I should be, but sadly it's been a journey that I wish I never started, and now that it has would never end. If I had the benefit of hindsight, maybe I would not have gotten married not just for myself, but the wife's sake. If that was a possibility, I have to agree that I will have total freedom loads of unrestricted fun, no holds barred slamfcuk, but I know it could never replace the family decision made years ago.

[DO_YOU_BJ]

From the read, I gather that most of us recognize the importance of the family for those who are married/ with kids. But somehow there's a disjoint between that and being totally faithful to the core. I'm sure there are men out there who are fully committed to their wives - for various reasons, that they are by nature a committed husband, no exposure or simply no money to play. Then again in this society, these are the exceptions rather than the norm. And they have my utmost respect because they can do what I have tried so hard to but always fail.

My take is that men's characters are naturally inclined to "evil", just my take ok - dun be offended. So any temptations will cause one to succumb, some may need none! I remember how at one stage of my life long time ago when I was an exception, until things spiralled out of control. To this day, I'm still trying to right the wrongs, to walk away, maybe not as hard as I should be, but sadly it's been a journey that I wish I never started, and now that it has would never end. If I had the benefit of hindsight, maybe I would not have gotten married not just for myself, but the wife's sake. If that was a possibility, I have to agree that I will have total freedom loads of unrestricted fun, no holds barred slamfcuk, but I know it could never replace the family decision made years ago.

Bro, very good posts wif a lot of sincerity from ur context.
In my book, a committed man's 1st priority is always his family.
He may steal outside but he never forgets his priority, namely, his family.
So, he may be having 1,2,3 or even more lovers outside, but at a press of the family activation button, he can readily u unhesitatingly drop everything n be by his priority's side.
Probs most often than not happens when, he forgot to apply the boundary lines between his priority n everything starts to crisscross one another n all hell breaks loose n he is left wif a very tangled up mess that is very hard to untangle, not impossible, but very difficult.
Thus, the old saying, we shud do everything wif our eyes wide open, not shut.
Good post bro, cheers upz u when my pwr recovers;)

[flowbow]

From the read, I gather that most of us recognize the importance of the family for those who are married/ with kids. But somehow there's a disjoint between that and being totally faithful to the core. I'm sure there are men out there who are fully committed to their wives - for various reasons, that they are by nature a committed husband, no exposure or simply no money to play. Then again in this society, these are the exceptions rather than the norm. And they have my utmost respect because they can do what I have tried so hard to but always fail.

My take is that men's characters are naturally inclined to "evil", just my take ok - dun be offended. So any temptations will cause one to succumb, some may need none! I remember how at one stage of my life long time ago when I was an exception, until things spiralled out of control. To this day, I'm still trying to right the wrongs, to walk away, maybe not as hard as I should be, but sadly it's been a journey that I wish I never started, and now that it has would never end. If I had the benefit of hindsight, maybe I would not have gotten married not just for myself, but the wife's sake. If that was a possibility, I have to agree that I will have total freedom loads of unrestricted fun, no holds barred slamfcuk, but I know it could never replace the family decision made years ago.
Agree with bro DYBJ, very sincere and honest post you wrote there. SBF has really opened my eyes up to see the real world as it really is... So many people around me could very well be one of the "norms" you mentioned. I shudder to think about it because it would kill me to see my loved ones having to deal with a cheating partner.

Well, glad you can look at things from a 3rd person perspective though. I like that you didn't bother justifying your reasons for cheating. Kudos to you bro. :)

[Toyota Honda]

My Oc and I regard it as a normal way for me to destress when shje is not available for me. Not available as in busy, or she is not needed. She also recognises the fact that I need many women in my life right from the start and she willingly accept this even during our courtship days till we are married then divorced but still living together and loving each other.

Its not cheating in my case, but rather a very understanding concept of love between us both.

But end of the day, I still love her and care for her all these years as a bf, husband, mentor, adviser, helper, plumber, grocery walker etc.

[Stezo]

My current GF of 10months was in two long term relationships with married men (not at the same time, 1 man at a time). They always told her they would divorce there wives for her, but never happened.

We talked about cheating.

She says women need variety in things, hence they have many shoes, Men need variety in people, hence have many women.

Some truth to that I think.

Relationships are complicated things, and I think if a guy needs to have some alternative release occasionally then as long as it is safe, it is ok. It's when it becomes an ongoing affair, is when it causes problems..

[Scanner]

My Oc and I regard it as a normal way for me to destress when shje is not available for me. Not available as in busy, or she is not needed. She also recognises the fact that I need many women in my life right from the start and she willingly accept this even during our courtship days till we are married then divorced but still living together and loving each other.

Its not cheating in my case, but rather a very understanding concept of love between us both.

But end of the day, I still love her and care for her all these years as a bf, husband, mentor, adviser, helper, plumber, grocery walker etc.

TH, you are in a most unique position. Not everyone has it.

[DO_YOU_BJ]

Well, glad you can look at things from a 3rd person perspective though.

My dear flowbow, when one is able to tink n appreciate life from a stance of a 旁观者 for his own probs n issues, it only tells u tat tis person has reached a higher form of mental maturity or mental state n has achieved n moved on to a new plane of wisdom.
I see ur signature, read this post, try to understand n practice looking at things n people not from ur eyes but from 旁观者 eyes, wat u see will shock u but also, understand life, why what how people do what they do or say, n that facade or fictions as u term it wud be of no necessity anymore;)
I always tell people i feel worth telling,
逃避是后悔的开始
面对，了解是幸福的开始
Cheers:)

[amatory]

I could not tell her the truth.

[flowbow]

My dear flowbow, when one is able to tink n appreciate life from a stance of a 旁观者 for his own probs n issues, it only tells u tat tis person has reached a higher form of mental maturity or mental state n has achieved n moved on to a new plane of wisdom.
I see ur signature, read this post, try to understand n practice looking at things n people not from ur eyes but from 旁观者 eyes, wat u see will shock u but also, understand life, why what how people do what they do or say, n that facade or fictions as u term it wud be of no necessity anymore;)
I always tell people i feel worth telling,
逃避是后悔的开始
面对，了解是幸福的开始
Cheers:)

Bro DYBJ, thanks for your kind words of advice. I understood majority of your post, except that my eyes get lazy when it comes to reading chinese words :p

Next time can translate to english for me? :o

[DO_YOU_BJ]

Bro DYBJ, thanks for your kind words of advice. I understood majority of your post, except that my eyes get lazy when it comes to reading chinese words :p

Next time can translate to english for me? :o

Ur wish is my command ;)
逃避是后悔的开始 >> Escapism is the beginning of regret
面对，了解是幸福的开始 >> Facing it n understanding it is the beginning to happiness

[flowbow]

Ur wish is my command ;)
逃避是后悔的开始 >> Escapism is the beginning of regret
面对，了解是幸福的开始 >> Facing it n understanding it is the beginning to happiness
Thank you very much. Guess it's time to change my sig ;)

[DYBJ]

Thank you very much. Guess it's time to change my sig ;)
Ur most welcum, anytime;)

[Powerpuffgirl]

For someone married for ard 2 years, I guess the reason to look ard is boredom in the bedroom activities. Things are just not as exciting anymore and all ECAs are fueled by pure lust.

When a couple stays together over a period of time, companionships kicks in, romance takes an exit. Daily routines like cooking, washing, listening to his work frustrations becomes a daily 'share the burden' activity.

Smses and conversation becomes functional and there are less laughters and romance.

That prob the reason why I choose to look else where to fill up what is missing. Guilty? Yes for sure. Given a choice, I would nvr want him to find out or have the family fall apart.

[<<totally>>]

For someone married for ard 2 years, I guess the reason to look ard is boredom in the bedroom activities. Things are just not as exciting anymore and all ECAs are fueled by pure lust.

When a couple stays together over a period of time, companionships kicks in, romance takes an exit. Daily routines like cooking, washing, listening to his work frustrations becomes a daily 'share the burden' activity.

Smses and conversation becomes functional and there are less laughters and romance.

That prob the reason why I choose to look else where to fill up what is missing. Guilty? Yes for sure. Given a choice, I would nvr want him to find out or have the family fall apart.

:cool:因为人明知道是错，还是会做. 到底是愚笨还是傻，其实是爱. 你的那个爱不是去爱，是要被爱.

[<<totally>>]

Thank you very much. Guess it's time to change my sig ;)

Part of letting go of someone you love is accepting that you may never have all the answers.

How I see letting go

Letting go of someone you love is the highest form of love - spirituality love. At any time, she is there in your heart by your side and no one can snatch that away.

A true love does not conformed to constraints and boundaries.

A thought of her with a beat of your heart and a blessing within you will be enough as Love is about self sacrificing and giving not taking.

[Rickey]

For someone married for ard 2 years, I guess the reason to look ard is boredom in the bedroom activities. Things are just not as exciting anymore and all ECAs are fueled by pure lust.

When a couple stays together over a period of time, companionships kicks in, romance takes an exit. Daily routines like cooking, washing, listening to his work frustrations becomes a daily 'share the burden' activity.

Smses and conversation becomes functional and there are less laughters and romance.
That prob the reason why I choose to look else where to fill up what is missing.

Oh no !!..Not again ! :(..another tragedy confirmed last Nov of murder n suicide of a sg guy n his PR prc wife :eek: in ytd's New Paper Headlines, adding to the growing numbers of wife cheaters. The exact root cause of the husband's affairs was not given but its become all too familiar to us as hv been discussed in the earlier posts of tis n other similar threads. When will we ever learn ?? History keeps on repeating itself..believe its not going to be the last of such cases..sigh. Why get married in the 1st place if we know or ought to know frm experience of previous cases tat we are very likely to betray our partners some time down the marriage road. Save ourselves n others who are dragged along of such tragedies by staying single.

To the ladies out there who happily tink they hv found their MAN or their MR RIGHT, pls be cautioned NOT to get too elated n carried away by the romance of the moment as sis powerpuffgirl hv said it all, short n sweet. Chances are 8 out of 10 guys will stray some time during their marriage. Will you be able to take it emotionally if ur 'Prince Charming' betrays you for another woman shortly after the wedding as hv happened in so many cases. How sure are you tat ur 'Knight in Shining Armour' is gonna stay faithful n loyal to u throughout ur lives together ?..its really good to ask urselves tis question b4 u sign on the dotted line to give urself to him for life. For me, i rather remain single than put myself at risk of such tragedy...

My impassioned plea to ALL who are STILL UNMARRIED is tat u consider carefully n rationally n make DOUBLY SURE tat the person u going to marry is REALLY ur Mr or Miss Right before u enter into marriage or holy matrimony to save urselves of a lot of heartaches in the future.. Jus my 3 cents worth of tot

[<<totally>>]

My impassioned plea to ALL who are STILL UNMARRIED is tat u consider carefully n rationally n make DOUBLY SURE tat the person u going to marry is REALLY ur Mr or Miss Right before u enter into marriage or holy matrimony to save urselves of a lot of heartaches in the future.. Jus my 3 cents worth of tot

Thks for the pat on my back, my pat will come soon. Marriage is piece of paper but to give woman kinda security bond that comfort woman for fucking with husband for the period of time raw+ time wasted.

Cohabitation looks appealing to me in order to be 'fair' terms and conditions can be drawn, both parties must agreed with mutual respect and understanding.

No matter what, nothing in this world stay unchanged. If you dun changed, you will be replaced! We have to be constantly changing in order not to be changed by the changing society. My thoughts of today if I read them 2 years later, I believed I might say something different.:)

[royalblood]

i cheated based on lust. men are sexual creatures. and when we see a female who is deem to have more survival genes than your current gf/wife/whatever, we would certainly be drawn towards her.

[flowbow]

Part of letting go of someone you love is accepting that you may never have all the answers.

How I see letting go

Letting go of someone you love is the highest form of love - spirituality love. At any time, she is there in your heart by your side and no one can snatch that away.

A true love does not conformed to constraints and boundaries.

A thought of her with a beat of your heart and a blessing within you will be enough as Love is about self sacrificing and giving not taking.

I don't disagree with all you've said but actually that's not what my sig means. It's not about not being able to let go of someone... In fact, it is about accepting the reason behind letting go of that someone.

Well, don't think too much into it - I chose it because it applies to me in my current situation. ;)

[Pascal]

[QUOTE=deludedgal;7681907]i think its the sex... if u had a good one before.. u will find it sad to have a bad one all the tim

Please kill me

[Pascal]

[QUOTE=deludedgal;7681907]i think its the sex... if u had a good one before.. u will find it sad to have a bad one all the tim

Because they want the man that's in love with them to kill themselves from heartbreak and pain

[Klein76]

For someone married for ard 2 years, I guess the reason to look ard is boredom in the bedroom activities. Things are just not as exciting anymore and all ECAs are fueled by pure lust.

When a couple stays together over a period of time, companionships kicks in, romance takes an exit. Daily routines like cooking, washing, listening to his work frustrations becomes a daily 'share the burden' activity.

Smses and conversation becomes functional and there are less laughters and romance.

That prob the reason why I choose to look else where to fill up what is missing. Guilty? Yes for sure. Given a choice, I would nvr want him to find out or have the family fall apart.



Well said Powerpuffgirl, This i totally agree with you!

[fictionman]

Although I cheated on my wife of 13years, I always hope she will say I'm Forever Your Girl till the end of time...How selfish but that's the honest truth!


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3cXkw_7yIVM&feature=youtube_gdata_player

[DO_YOU_BJ]

i cheated based on lust. Men are sexual creatures.
This statement i 110% agree

and when we see a female who is deem to have more survival genes than your current gf/wife/whatever, we would certainly be drawn towards her.
This one i totally dun agree!:o

[freezetheDB]

i think for most men this is the case.

Our heart has only one place for a woman, however it is the opposite for our dicks

[chums]

It's all about getting to know another girl, the flirting and sexual tension between both parties. Relatively common in today's world. Same applies for women as well.

Ultimately it's a choice we make, whether to cheat or to find the spark with our partners.

[CowBeCowBu]

Wife neber give after 1st kid.
Last time I had with wife was almost 1 yr ago.
Everytime have to ask as if i am beggar lidat.
Now I lazy to ask le. I'll just try to tahan and not eat out too often.

[fictionman]

Wife neber give after 1st kid.
Last time I had with wife was almost 1 yr ago.
Everytime have to ask as if i am beggar lidat.
Now I lazy to ask le. I'll just try to tahan and not eat out too often.

I share yr pain bro....Mine is diff coz my wife still wats it but its me who seldom gives...sigh...hard to xplain...bored wz the same woman aft so long...

Dont get me wrong...I still love my wife dearly just tt the intimacy is vanishing...I eat out coz I wat to feel the passion of sex while doing it...I knw WLs are paid to make us happy but at least for that 1 or 2 hrs I feel sexy again...Sad huh...

[deludedgal]

I share yr pain bro....Mine is diff coz my wife still wats it but its me who seldom gives...sigh...hard to xplain...bored wz the same woman aft so long...

Dont get me wrong...I still love my wife dearly just tt the intimacy is vanishing...I eat out coz I wat to feel the passion of sex while doing it...I knw WLs are paid to make us happy but at least for that 1 or 2 hrs I feel sexy again...Sad huh...

really so hard to talk to her about it and try to spice things up? wont feel empty after doing it with strangers? or people who dont love you just want u for sex? then whats the point of marriage =/

[CowBeCowBu]

really so hard to talk to her about it and try to spice things up? wont feel empty after doing it with strangers? or people who dont love you just want u for sex? then whats the point of marriage =/

Trust me I tried to spice things up, talk to her, even suggest go c counseling.
Reply was no where near what I expect. Like: y u always think abt making love. I'm tired, y dun u go self service. etc. when suggest go counseling is even worse. She become so defensive.
Marriage is perhaps about everything but sex/love making.
I have given up.
It feels empty having sex with strangers. I only clock myself like once every few mths I eat outside. The rest of the time is pcc.

Pathetic hor. But I dun wan to go anywhere near the idea of The big D.

[deludedgal]

Didnt she realised if u dun get satisfied u may find somewhere else to satisy? She never thought about that? unless she isn't keen on saving her marriage. She should be worried :(

[DO_YOU_BJ]

Didnt she realised if u dun get satisfied u may find somewhere else to satisy? She never thought about that? unless she isn't keen on saving her marriage. She should be worried :(

Hv u ever once tot the possibility tat she knows n is quite happy someone is doin something tat maybe she doesn't like for her?
N knowing her man, she knows he'll eat out but won't da bao?
So still a win win for her?
Incase u r not aware, there r many women who know their men eat out, but when they return, they r still good daddy's n husbands.
So, in this line of tot, y shud she be angry?
Getting married is easy.
Keeping it is not.
I know many women like wat i just mentioned, i think they're smart n more worthy of my respect than those who pick a fuss n fight

[Alf1977]

Didnt she realised if u dun get satisfied u may find somewhere else to satisy? She never thought about that? unless she isn't keen on saving her marriage. She should be worried :(

Didn't he realise even he dont satisfy her, she can find outside too? I guess he should be worried if she does not give her but enjoying outside.. I always find it amusing when those guys who cheat find out that their girls cheat outside too!!! Don't know it is consider retribution or one mountain is higher than another mountain theory....LoL

[deludedgal]

Hv u ever once tot the possibility tat she knows n is quite happy someone is doin something tat maybe she doesn't like for her?
N knowing her man, she knows he'll eat out but won't da bao?
So still a win win for her?
Incase u r not aware, there r many women who know their men eat out, but when they return, they r still good daddy's n husbands.
So, in this line of tot, y shud she be angry?
Getting married is easy.
Keeping it is not.
I know many women like wat i just mentioned, i think they're smart n more worthy of my respect than those who pick a fuss n fight

hmm... then again so u dun mind yr wife cheating outside ah.. i mean if she cannot get satisfaction with you she also doing outside most probably.

Like Alf1977 mentioned.. unless the married couple really dont mind lor... not having sex with each other and doing it with elseone.

[DO_YOU_BJ]

hmm... then again so u dun mind yr wife cheating outside ah.. i mean if she cannot get satisfaction with you she also doing outside most probably.

Like Alf1977 mentioned.. unless the married couple really dont mind lor... not having sex with each other and doing it with elseone.

无知无罪，明知天罪
Go look around u la, no need to argue abt reality.
How many know but close an eye
How many know but dun close an eye
Conclusion on both differs
Opinions r another issue altogether
Welcum to the REAL WORLD:D

[<<totally>>]

hmm... then again so u dun mind yr wife cheating outside ah.. i mean if she cannot get satisfaction with you she also doing outside most probably.


I know many women like wat i just mentioned, i think they're smart n more worthy of my respect than those who pick a fuss n fight

Sis deludedgal, I thought Bro DO_YOU_BJ post was saying he respected those woman knowingly their husband's eating out habits but never pick a fuss and fight as their husbands still returning back to be the good husband and daddy.

Respecting a decision might not be agreeing it as to let it happened to ones self. Maybe I give an example: I respect A for being a worthy opponent. But I hated him for he is my enemy. See?

Anyway a clever woman is one who act silly, knowingly some things but act as if they did not know anything. While a silly woman is one who thought she knows everything and tried to make a big fuss. In the end, ending up losing what she intended to keep. :)

After all a marriage is 一个愿打，一个愿挨，两个才久.

[<<totally>>]

无知无罪，明知天罪
Go look around u la, no need to argue abt reality.


Haha, I thought my reply was quick, in the end I still saw your post above me after I submitted my reply. Some things are never meant to be learned unless one goes through it.:D

[DO_YOU_BJ]

Some things are never meant to be learned unless one goes through it.:D
Thus the old saying:
Jiao Kia Mmmm Zai Lastic
&
Kiang Teo Ho Mai Geh Kiang
Wanna tok abt marriage, get married 1st
Wanna complain abt infidelity in marraige
Still need to get married 1st
Anything before tat is nottin but 纸上谈兵

[<<totally>>]

Anything before tat is nottin but 纸上谈兵

Okie. :o I will bear that in mind. For once again, you show me a bearing.
ps: Gu Kia Mmmm Zai Lao Hor, Gin Nah Mmmm Zai Giah.:p

Cheers

[fictionman]

There are 2 kinds of cheating....One is eating out just for the sexual pleasure wz no strings attach & 2nd is having an affair wz some1 whom you deeply care abt other then yr wife/husband....

There's a BIG diff if kena caught by our partners....Maybe we can forgive if its only sex without feelings but I doubt partners can 4give & 4get if he/she is having an affair....

I was nearly caught once coz of sms...Didnt delete some flowery words fm a gal I met online...One day when I was having my afternoon nap the phone beep beep....Wifey see the msg & ask me who the hell is the woman!!!...Told her ex corlick...Had quarrels for few days abt this....

I admit I only wanted to hv sexual relationship wz the woman & we actually talk abt it....In the end we decided not to aft I told her abt my wife finding out abt her...Though I told my wife we just frends but she didnt believe me...The woman is also married & in the end we decided to end our "relationship" for the sake of our marriage...That's the closes I ever to finding a fb...

I underestimate my wife abt not looking at my hp...The other woman kept on reminding me to delete her sms aft reading it but I brush her fears aside...So till tdy I nvr try to find a fb anymore...We nvr kept in touch anymore aft tt incident...She felt guilty to me & her husband...

[DO_YOU_BJ]

There are 2 kinds of cheating....One is eating out just for the sexual pleasure wz no strings attach & 2nd is having an affair wz some1 whom you deeply care abt other then yr wife/husband....

There's a BIG diff if kena caught by our partners....Maybe we can forgive if its only sex without feelings but I doubt partners can 4give & 4get if he/she is having an affair....

I was nearly caught once coz of sms...Didnt delete some flowery words fm a gal I met online...One day when I was having my afternoon nap the phone beep beep....Wifey see the msg & ask me who the hell is the woman!!!...Told her ex corlick...Had quarrels for few days abt this....

I admit I only wanted to hv sexual relationship wz the woman & we actually talk abt it....In the end we decided not to aft I told her abt my wife finding out abt her...Though I told my wife we just frends but she didnt believe me...The woman is also married & in the end we decided to end our "relationship" for the sake of our marriage...That's the closes I ever to finding a fb...

I underestimate my wife abt not looking at my hp...The other woman kept on reminding me to delete her sms aft reading it but I brush her fears aside...So till tdy I nvr try to find a fb anymore...We nvr kept in touch anymore aft tt incident...She felt guilty to me & her husband...

Exactly bro.
Were u able to prove tat u nvr up tat married woman?
If ur wife insisted tat u did, do u tink u can ever prove tat u didnt?
N is ur wife still wif u today?
If so, i rest my case;)

[fictionman]

Exactly bro.
Were u able to prove tat u nvr up tat married woman?
If ur wife insisted tat u did, do u tink u can ever prove tat u didnt?
N is ur wife still wif u today?
If so, i rest my case;)

Haha what proof???...No condoms were used & no hotel receipts were issued..

We sms talkin abt such things as shld I use a condom or not when we meet up but damn heng the sms my wife saw is talking abt sthing else...If not I bet u the quarrel we had wont be few days only...

Yes my wife is still wz me!!!

[DO_YOU_BJ]

Haha what proof???...No condoms were used & no hotel receipts were issued..

We sms talkin abt such things as shld I use a condom or not when we meet up but damn heng the sms my wife saw is talking abt sthing else...If not I bet u the quarrel we had wont be few days only...

Yes my wife is still wz me!!!
Lol, bro, u too sensitive n defensive.
In the 1st place, y wud u keep condoms used to only be used as proof ltr correct?
Hotel receipts if use cash n dispose of immediately after deed also still no proof.
Wat i meant to say was, if ur wife insisted tat something did happen, no matter wat, u wud nvr be able to prove tat u did not do it.
Get it now?
N my point was, yes congrats, ur wife n u r still together, means she's smart.
The moral of my participation in this thread is, in a marriage, the tot or intention to eat out is already a betrayal of ur other half.
Thus, bcos, ur wife is still wif u now, shows wat i mentioned above is correct.
Tks for replying n affirming my stand bro :D
Hv a gd weekend;)

[<<totally>>]

Haha what proof???...No condoms were used & no hotel receipts were issued..

We sms talkin abt such things as shld I use a condom or not when we meet up but damn heng the sms my wife saw is talking abt sthing else...If not I bet u the quarrel we had wont be few days only...

Yes my wife is still wz me!!!

I'm curious what was that something else that saved you har? Yes physically your wife might be there, emotional scars cannot be seen. I bet another time if sure case appear, your benefit of doubts will confirm tio revoke.

Looks like you are the metal teeth clan member. :D

[K9696]

Looks like you are the metal teeth clan member. :D

Bro., hokkien says Tee-KEE....lolzz
I also rest my case...:p:o:D

[fictionman]

I'm curious what was that something else that saved you har? Yes physically your wife might be there, emotional scars cannot be seen. I bet another time if sure case appear, your benefit of doubts will confirm tio revoke.

Looks like you are the metal teeth clan member. :D

Its for me to know & for you to find out haha...

I dont wat to take anymore risk in finding a fb...once bitten 100 times shy...

She's a good wife & mother...pardon my stupidity but wat is metal teeth clan???

[CowBeCowBu]

Wa lan eh, someone accuse me as clone.

Clone with who? come clarify?
KNNB

[CowBeCowBu]

There are 2 kinds of cheating....One is eating out just for the sexual pleasure wz no strings attach & 2nd is having an affair wz some1 whom you deeply care abt other then yr wife/husband....



True, that there are 2 kinds, but there are times where the session is so good that the line differentiating the 2 become blurry.

I think some of you watch ch8 drama where the hubby chose to go for divorce after all the kids have grown up.

Maybe that's my fate too. I just have to wait for like 20++ years. sigh...

[Alf1977]

There are 2 kinds of cheating....One is eating out just for the sexual pleasure wz no strings attach & 2nd is having an affair wz some1 whom you deeply care abt other then yr wife/husband....

There's a BIG diff if kena caught by our partners....Maybe we can forgive if its only sex without feelings but I doubt partners can 4give & 4get if he/she is having an affair....

I was nearly caught once coz of sms...Didnt delete some flowery words fm a gal I met online...One day when I was having my afternoon nap the phone beep beep....Wifey see the msg & ask me who the hell is the woman!!!...Told her ex corlick...Had quarrels for few days abt this....

I admit I only wanted to hv sexual relationship wz the woman & we actually talk abt it....In the end we decided not to aft I told her abt my wife finding out abt her...Though I told my wife we just frends but she didnt believe me...The woman is also married & in the end we decided to end our "relationship" for the sake of our marriage...That's the closes I ever to finding a fb...

I underestimate my wife abt not looking at my hp...The other woman kept on reminding me to delete her sms aft reading it but I brush her fears aside...So till tdy I nvr try to find a fb anymore...We nvr kept in touch anymore aft tt incident...She felt guilty to me & her husband...

Brothers who play/eat outside, my advice is have two phones or at least two lines. The fixed lined for your family/wife/gf whereas another (better get a prepaid card that can get for $5 or $18) to communicate with your fling.. This is definitely a safer way if you consider getting a fb.

[Alf1977]

Hv u ever once tot the possibility tat she knows n is quite happy someone is doin something tat maybe she doesn't like for her?
N knowing her man, she knows he'll eat out but won't da bao?
So still a win win for her?
Incase u r not aware, there r many women who know their men eat out, but when they return, they r still good daddy's n husbands.
So, in this line of tot, y shud she be angry?
Getting married is easy.
Keeping it is not.
I know many women like wat i just mentioned, i think they're smart n more worthy of my respect than those who pick a fuss n fight

I don't think women are considered smart if they did not pick a fuss n fight when she discover her husband eats out...
1) the husband maybe super rich, n she sees no point to pick a fuss .. She be more upset if husband don't give her money.she sees money more important than the husband.
2) because of kids. Don't know why there are some who tolerate their husbands' flings/ mistresses because they want to give their children a complete family.. Pretty dumb I should say .. The women generally give up hope on their husbands but hang on because of their children.
3) the women themselves are eating outside and this category has a mindset of you play your stuff, I play with mine.. Don't bother what I do n I won't bother about you attitude.. Oh well if your women fell under this category, don't know to congratulate you or pity u .. But at least you get to play your game wearing green caps if you don't mind.

Frankly speaking, women who don't pick a fight after knowing their guys eat outside is very rare. if I am a woman and who happen to have a cheating husband, I will sure go out n play more guys than the husband did... And let him have a taste of his own medicine and at the same time seek revenge to feel better.

[Hotcoffee]

True, that there are 2 kinds, but there are times where the session is so good that the line differentiating the 2 become blurry.

I think some of you watch ch8 drama where the hubby chose to go for divorce after all the kids have grown up.

Maybe that's my fate too. I just have to wait for like 20++ years. sigh...

It came to my mind recently too. Many just bite e bullet and endure till kids are grown up. Sigh.

[DO_YOU_BJ]

I don't think women are considered smart if they did not pick a fuss n fight when she discover her husband eats out...
1) the husband maybe super rich, n she sees no point to pick a fuss .. She be more upset if husband don't give her money.she sees money more important than the husband.
2) because of kids. Don't know why there are some who tolerate their husbands' flings/ mistresses because they want to give their children a complete family.. Pretty dumb I should say .. The women generally give up hope on their husbands but hang on because of their children.
3) the women themselves are eating outside and this category has a mindset of you play your stuff, I play with mine.. Don't bother what I do n I won't bother about you attitude.. Oh well if your women fell under this category, don't know to congratulate you or pity u .. But at least you get to play your game wearing green caps if you don't mind.

Frankly speaking, women who don't pick a fight after knowing their guys eat outside is very rare. if I am a woman and who happen to have a cheating husband, I will sure go out n play more guys than the husband did... And let him have a taste of his own medicine and at the same time seek revenge to feel better.

This is not a matter of how u tink or watsoever.
It's how it is.
Conclusion is tat, some marriages endure the tests, some dun.
Read my siggy, its self explanatory

[Alf1977]

Maybe sometimes we cheat cause of the thrill we seek in eating out but not get caught by wife.. And as time goes by, it becomes a habit.. Haha

[Powerpuffgirl]

Oh no !!..Not again ! :(..another tragedy confirmed last Nov of murder n suicide of a sg guy n his PR prc wife :eek: in ytd's New Paper Headlines, adding to the growing numbers of wife cheaters. The exact root cause of the husband's affairs was not given but its become all too familiar to us as hv been discussed in the earlier posts of tis n other similar threads. When will we ever learn ?? History keeps on repeating itself..believe its not going to be the last of such cases..sigh. Why get married in the 1st place if we know or ought to know frm experience of previous cases tat we are very likely to betray our partners some time down the marriage road. Save ourselves n others who are dragged along of such tragedies by staying single.

To the ladies out there who happily tink they hv found their MAN or their MR RIGHT, pls be cautioned NOT to get too elated n carried away by the romance of the moment as sis powerpuffgirl hv said it all, short n sweet. Chances are 8 out of 10 guys will stray some time during their marriage. Will you be able to take it emotionally if ur 'Prince Charming' betrays you for another woman shortly after the wedding as hv happened in so many cases. How sure are you tat ur 'Knight in Shining Armour' is gonna stay faithful n loyal to u throughout ur lives together ?..its really good to ask urselves tis question b4 u sign on the dotted line to give urself to him for life. For me, i rather remain single than put myself at risk of such tragedy...

My impassioned plea to ALL who are STILL UNMARRIED is tat u consider carefully n rationally n make DOUBLY SURE tat the person u going to marry is REALLY ur Mr or Miss Right before u enter into marriage or holy matrimony to save urselves of a lot of heartaches in the future.. Jus my 3 cents worth of tot

Yes. Think carefully before committing yourself to a marriage. A good man might not be the right man.

I am still happily loved by the person I marry, but i would choose to be single if I could turn back time.

[fictionman]

Yes. Think carefully before committing yourself to a marriage. A good man might not be the right man.

I am still happily loved by the person I marry, but i would choose to be single if I could turn back time.

One won't know if the man/woman is good until one is married to them...

You say you are happily married but wish you are single...So not really happily married la in a way...

[cowcowcow]

It is hard wired into us by evolution to fuck and reproduce.

[Alf1977]

When u don't have the thing, you wish for it.. When u have it, you won't treasure it ... That applies to marriage or wife..

Morale of story love yourself more and only marry when u intend to have children/or house if you below 35.. Actually also can don't marry To have all these things/children.. Nothing is impossible and marriage is nothing but a piece of paper and tonnes of responsibilities.. Some times I wonder why people settle down so early and lost all freedom.. Is it worth it? To have a family, children but still go out to f other women ...

In this world, there is only one person u should love n trust n that is yourself ...

[<<totally>>]

Maybe sometimes we cheat cause of the thrill we seek in eating out but not get caught by wife.. And as time goes by, it becomes a habit.. Haha

This type is what I called the never see coffin never drop tear member.:D

[<<totally>>]

Its for me to know & for you to find out haha...

I dont wat to take anymore risk in finding a fb...once bitten 100 times shy...

She's a good wife & mother...pardon my stupidity but wat is metal teeth clan???

Okie, at least you did acknowledge the fault came from your side. FYI metal teeth undergoes two translation processes. First english to chinese and from chinese to hokkien. Metal teeth=铁牙=Tee Kee （stubborn）

孺子可教也
知我者谓我心忧，不知我者谓我何求
悠悠苍天，此何人哉
知我者也， 是也非也~:cool:

[fictionman]

PRC girls got good cbs, me like to lick,,

They taste "sweeter" ah bro haha

[Rickey]

It is hard wired into us by evolution to fuck and reproduce. Society and social norms have confined us to one woman. This goes against our biological systems and this behaviour is a denial our natural impulses. To free ourselves, we stick to society standards on the outside. But on the inside we crave fucking other women and end up doing it to satisfy our urges.

When u don't have the thing, you wish for it.. When u have it, you won't treasure it ... That applies to marriage or wife..

Morale of story love yourself more and only marry when u intend to have children/or house if you below 35.. Actually also can don't marry To have all these things/children.. Some times I wonder why people settle down so early and lost all freedom.. Is it worth it? To have a family, children but still go out to f other women ...

Regretably for the ladies, tis is true...there is a high tendency for men to cheat...so it is beta for them to know tis fact n check out on their MAN first rather than later after they hv gotten married which will usually be too late n then having to go for a divorce...Its so sad to find tat most guys hav to cheat on their partners at certain point in time in their r/s n vice versa, the reasons of which r all too familiar to us by now as hv been discussed by many bros here..Some of these reasons may be valid n understandable but some others are not..

Watever the reasons for either party to want to cheat like ONS etc, if u really hv to do, pls remember to do so SAFELY..i.e. wear protection etc n make sure u do not contract or pass HIV/STDs to each other during the heat n passion of the moment...whilst the heat, passion n enjoyment of those moments seems very irresistable n compelling, there is always a high danger n probability of contracting such diseases if one has sex wif multiple partners frm time to time...believe me, it would be a DISASTER for one to contract such diseases in such ways...some STDs are very difficult to cure n can be very painful...there's no way to be absolutely certain tat ur guy or gal is 100% disease free at their privates etc...so to be really safe for guys n gals, its always best to stick to ONLY ONE partner for sex if possible...but tis of course is easier said than done...tat explains why there's so much misery n heartaches caused 2day by tis problem of guys/gals cheating on each other...:(

[Alf1977]

Well said, Rickey!

If bo pain need/urge to cheat, pla do it safely (don't save a few dollars on CDs and end up bringing HIV/STD to yourself n to other) and cheat with some intelligence please! (unless you want to divorce your wife /break up with gf, then purposely give some tell tale signs that you are cheating) Some women are so stupid that they don't know their bfs/husbands are cheating behind their backs.

[Metropoly2012]

My wife hint me:
If i want to play play outside always wear CD!! and don't let her find out. :rolleyes:

[<<totally>>]

When u don't have the thing, you wish for it. When u have it, you won't treasure it. That applies to marriage or wife.

This is what I called CHEAP! AKA 贱. 天做孽犹可恕,自做贱不可活. Despite knowing what will be the consequences, yet knowing doing it. Thus if things do happen 'according to their plans', what more can they say but to admit it. That is why the guys were scolded as '贱丈夫' for there is a story behind it.

An analogue I will like to share. (http://ctext.org/mengzi/gong-sun-chou-ii#n1648)

公孙丑下:
孟子致为臣而归。王就见孟子，曰：“前日愿见而不可得，得侍，同朝甚喜。今又弃寡人而归，不识可以继此而得 见乎？”对曰：“不敢请耳，固所愿也。”

Gong Sun Chou II:
Mencius gave up his office, and made arrangements for returning to his native State. The king came to visit him, and said, 'Formerly, I wished to see you, but in vain. Then, I got the opportunity of being by your side, and all my court joyed exceedingly along with me. Now again you abandon me, and are returning home. I do not know if hereafter I may expect to have another opportunity of seeing you.' Mencius replied, 'I dare not request permission to visit you at any particular time, but, indeed, it is what I desire.'
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他日，王谓时子曰：“我欲中国而授孟子室，养弟子以万锺，使诸大夫国人皆有所矜式。子盍为我言 之？”

Another day, the king said to the officer Shi, 'I wish to give Mencius a house, somewhere in the middle of the kingdom, and to support his disciples with an allowance of 10,000 zhong, that all the officers and the people may have such an example to reverence and imitate. Had you not better tell him this for me?'

时子因陈子而以告孟子，陈子以时子之言告孟子。孟子曰：“然。夫时子恶知其不可也？如使予欲富，辞十万而受 万，是为欲富乎？季孙曰：‘异哉子叔疑！使己为政，不用，则亦已矣，又使其子弟为卿。人亦孰不欲富贵？而独 于富贵之中，有私龙断焉。’古之为市也，以其所有易其所无者，有司者治之耳。有贱丈夫焉，必求龙断而登之， 以左右望而罔市利。人皆以为贱，故从而征之。征商，自此贱丈夫始矣。

Shi took advantage to convey this message by means of the disciple Chen, who reported his words to Mencius. Mencius said, 'Yes; but how should the officer Shi know that the thing could not be? Suppose that I wanted to be rich, having formerly declined 100,000 zhong, would my now accepting 10,000 be the conduct of one desiring riches? Ji Sun said, "A strange man was Zi Shu Yi. He pushed himself into the service of government. His prince declining to employ him, he had to retire indeed, but he again schemed that his son or younger brother should be made a high officer.

Who indeed is there of men but wishes for riches and honour? But he only, among the seekers of these, tried to monopolize the conspicuous mound. "Of old time, the market-dealers exchanged the articles which they had for others which they had not, and simply had certain officers to keep order among them.

It happened that there was a mean fellow, who made it a point to look out for a conspicuous mound, and get up upon it. Thence he looked right and left, to catch in his net the whole gain of the market. The people all thought his conduct mean, and therefore they proceeded to lay a tax upon his wares. The taxing of traders took its rise from this mean fellow."'


Some women are so stupid that they don't know their bfs/husbands are cheating behind their backs.

I beg to differ as sometimes it is not right to label them as stupid. I see it as a way to maintain the marriage from the work of a smart woman. A man will like a woman's silliness not referring in terms of intelligent but the 'outlook feel' with normal typical womanly characters. As man are also vanity creatures, 'smart-alex' woman do not capture the liking whereas the 'nerdy' looking ones are in favor.

Woman who are scheming are most dread for they are too sharp for anything to slip under their eyelids. An understanding and anything also never mind woman are most welcome as a man do feel more secure and safe when he is beside her. The guy do not need to worry constantly if it is another plot by his wife or living in a fear to be discovered by his wife.

Yes, I do agreed that there are woman who never knew what their husbands are doing behind their backs. However labeling as stupid should be the case, for she do have her own priorities thus forsaking other areas as she gave the husband the 'trust' that is important in a relationship. It is the husband who betray the trust and deemed more as a sinner rather than calling then wife stupid.

[<<totally>>]

Yes, I do agreed that there are woman who never knew what their husbands are doing behind their backs. However labeling as stupid should not be the case, for she do have her own priorities thus forsaking other areas as she gave the husband the 'trust' that is important in a relationship. It is the husband who betray the trust and deemed more as a sinner rather than calling then wife stupid.

Now then I saw there is a missing not in the post. Sorry for the extra post

[fictionman]

People always says choose yr husband properly b4 marriage...How can woman do tt...When dating time, the guy would do anything for the girl...Everything is a YES answer...Guys would see the girl home b4 going back on their own...Wait for the girl to knock off at their office...Carry their bags...Spend $$$ on them...

All these things tt the guys do will melt the girls heart...Of coz at the dating stage they will think they hv found the perfect guy to marry...Then the guy will get to hv sex wz their gf...All seems rosy...Such a perfect life together...

Dating time wont see each other daily & that adds to the xcitement when they meet up...Sex seems so nice...Orgasm aft orgasm...When we dont see each other daily our heart will be pound wz xcitement in anticipation of meeting..

Then we get married...1st few years of marriage things will still be the same...Lovey dovey...Feels so nice to finally stay together & wake up in each others arms...Sex is great coz get to hv it daily...Then kids comes into the picture...

Sex life is affected...Holidays are affected...After living & seeing each other daily, will begin to feel abit bored...Conversation begins to dry up...When dating time couldnt wait to held each others hand when walking...But aft marriage, hv to held the kids hand or just walk side by side only...

Sex becomes more of a chore then actually wanting it...We still will love each other 100% but it has become abit stale...Tts why guys will eat out to satisfy their urges coz it has become stale at home...Guys just wat to relive the dating days once again...But tt doesnt mean we will leave our family

[DO_YOU_BJ]

Sex becomes more of a chore then actually wanting it...We still will love each other 100% but it has become abit stale...Tts why guys will eat out to satisfy their urges coz it has become stale at home...Guys just wat to relive the dating days once again...But tt doesnt mean we will leave our family
Tats Y I say, n i quote
Bro, wat is a successful man?
A man who knows the distinctive line between FAMILY(Internal) and PLAY(external)
Play as u can n as u can afford but at the end of the day, know their place in ur life, then u can be self termed as a successful man.
Dun know what ur getting into, allow the lines to cross, and all hell breaks loose like now.
Get mental n not emotional about ur current situation.
脑是用来解决问题的
心是拿来搞乱问题的
Learn to differentiate the diff between internal n external n all ur probs will go away n u can once again call urself, a successful man.
Can't, n u hv failed!

[Alf1977]

This is what I called CHEAP! AKA 贱. 天做孽犹可恕,自做贱不可活. Despite knowing what will be the consequences, yet knowing doing it. Thus if things do happen 'according to their plans', what more can they say but to admit it. That is why the guys were scolded as '贱丈夫' for there is a story behind.

I beg to differ as sometimes it is not right to label them as stupid. I see it as a way to maintain the marriage from the work of a smart woman. A man will like a woman's silliness not referring in terms of intelligent but the 'outlook feel' with normal typical womanly characters. As man are also vanity creatures, 'smart-alex' woman do not capture the liking whereas the 'nerdy' looking ones are in favor.

Woman who are scheming are most dread for they are too sharp for anything to slip under their eyelids. An understanding and anything also never mind woman are most welcome as a man do feel more secure and safe when he is beside her. The guy do not need to worry constantly if it is another plot by his wife or living in a fear to be discovered by his wife.

Yes, I do agreed that there are woman who never knew what their husbands are doing behind their backs. However labeling as stupid should be the case, for she do have her own priorities tIhus forsaking other areas as she gave the husband the 'trust' that is important in a relationship. It is the husband who betray the trust and deemed more as a sinner rather than calling then wife stupid.

Morale of the long story is men love women who can take it when they cheat n eat outside and their women dont complain..men simply love to cheat !!!! N you are trying to say that an understanding woman is one who can accept that their guy cheat yet pretend nothing happen. If the guy is rich enough, it will be smart of the woman to act stupid and allow the guy to continue cheating ..who would want to cut off financial resources?

Best is to give each other free time to have sex with other partners outside their marriage so that their sex lives be more exciting than to do it with one another daily. The question is if your wife allow you to eat outside, will you be so open to let her eat outside as well? The answer is probably not, only a minority of guys (other than those who involved in swinging activities), will allow their wives to be fucked by other guys. Guess we are selfish by nature, want to enjoy by ourselves yet don't allow others to enjoy outside.

[Alf1977]

People always says choose yr husband properly b4 marriage...How can woman do tt...When dating time, the guy would do anything for the girl...Everything is a YES answer...Guys would see the girl home b4 going back on their own...Wait for the girl to knock off at their office...Carry their bags...Spend $$$ on them...

All these things tt the guys do will melt the girls heart...Of coz at the dating stage they will think they hv found the perfect guy to marry...Then the guy will get to hv sex wz their gf...All seems rosy...Such a perfect life together...

Dating time wont see each other daily & that adds to the xcitement when they meet up...Sex seems so nice...Orgasm aft orgasm...When we dont see each other daily our heart will be pound wz xcitement in anticipation of meeting..

Then we get married...1st few years of marriage things will still be the same...Lovey dovey...Feels so nice to finally stay together & wake up in each others arms...Sex is great coz get to hv it daily...Then kids comes into the picture...

Sex life is affected...Holidays are affected...After living & seeing each other daily, will begin to feel abit bored...Conversation begins to dry up...When dating time couldnt wait to held each others hand when walking...But aft marriage, hv to held the kids hand or just walk side by side only...

Sex becomes more of a chore then actually wanting it...We still will love each other 100% but it has become abit stale...Tts why guys will eat out to satisfy their urges coz it has become stale at home...Guys just wat to relive the dating days once again...But tt doesnt mean we will leave our family

If dating time, the guy already treat the girl like shit .. Then marriage will be worst!!! Will you marry a girl you don't love but marry her out of convenience and availability?

[Rickey]

People always says choose yr husband properly b4 marriage...How can woman do tt...When dating time, the guy would do anything for the girl...Everything is a YES answer...Guys would see the girl home b4 going back on their own...Wait for the girl to knock off at their office...Carry their bags...Spend $$$ on them...

All these things tt the guys do will melt the girls heart...Of coz at the dating stage they will think they hv found the perfect guy to marry...Then the guy will get to hv sex wz their gf...All seems rosy...Such a perfect life together...

Dating time wont see each other daily & that adds to the xcitement when they meet up...Sex seems so nice...Orgasm aft orgasm...When we dont see each other daily our heart will be pound wz xcitement in anticipation of meeting..

Then we get married...


Kudos to you, bro fictionman ! :)..a well written account of dating and married life in brief..a MUST READ for couples wishing to get married...Yes, again i say its Cavaet Emptor !!..buyers beta be aware !...Beta to go into marriage with BOTH EYES wide opened than wif 1 eye closed n make ur own assumptions or hv ur own expectations of ur partner after the wedding...Chances are u will be disappointed...So beta be sure than to be sorry later..My best wishes !

Perhaps one way is to set situational tests or traps for ur partner as many times as necessary to see his/her reaction when he/she least expects it. The element of surprise, will give him or her away easily...can be jus like wat some wifeys do to track their man when they suspect he is going astray..following them to hotels etc...My 3 cents worth

[Girlonly83]

Is paid sex consider as cheat?

I would prefer my hubby to get a paid sex which is always a one time thing, they won't coming knocking on your door.... Unlike affair/FBs which will still have higher percentage of marriage breaking down.

[Alf1977]

When a woman caught a guy cheat, she will not love the guy the same as before. So if u have to cheat, do it without getting caught so that you won't ruin a woman's life. It is sad that a couple be together not because of love but the responsibility. If I can turn back clock, I will choose love n happiness over the possibility of a stable relationship. I will not be so miserable as I am now and have to play with girls to make me feel better.

Guess I do not love my gf enough! And being together is more of a responsibility. People force to marry because of girl end up prEgnant but my case of a BTO flat.. I don't feel proud if I were to marry one day, no wedding dinner/lunch/, no brothers/sisters involved, no friends be invited, maybe just a handful of really close friends, I feel ashamed to get married in fact, just pay $30 to get that bloody marriage certificate or if die die any of our parents need to have a lunch/dinner, I won't pay more than 2k on the whole wedding .. Simply a waste of time and money.

[fictionman]

Is paid sex consider as cheat?

I would prefer my hubby to get a paid sex which is always a one time thing, they won't coming knocking on your door.... Unlike affair/FBs which will still have higher percentage of marriage breaking down.

Yes siista....

I only go for paid sex wz WLs when I got the urge...Pay,f**k & leave...This way no emotion attach...I'm not proud of wat I am doin behind my wife's back but it's human nature

[Reoxy]

公孙丑下:
孟子致为臣而归。王就见孟子，曰：“前日愿见而不可得，得侍，同朝甚喜。今又弃寡人而归，不识可以继此而得 见乎？”对曰：“不敢请耳，固所愿也。”

他日，王谓时子曰：“我欲中国而授孟子室，养弟子以万锺，使诸大夫国人皆有所矜式。子盍为我言 之？”

时子因陈子而以告孟子，陈子以时子之言告孟子。孟子曰：“然。夫时子恶知其不可也？如使予欲富，辞十万而受 万，是为欲富乎？季孙曰：‘异哉子叔疑！使己为政，不用，则亦已矣，又使其子弟为卿。人亦孰不欲富贵？而独 于富贵之中，有私龙断焉。’古之为市也，以其所有易其所无者，有司者治之耳。有贱丈夫焉，必求龙断而登之， 以左右望而罔市利。人皆以为贱，故从而征之。征商，自此贱丈夫始矣。



So deep. So deep.

[Alf1977]

Whether paid or unpaid sex, it is cheating! Wake up your idea!

So U r saying you can take it if your husband had sex with 100 prostitutes (all paid) it is fine as its not cheating? Don't be so naive and stupid.. When he insert his cock into other woman's its consider cheating no matter if it's paid, Malay, Thai, Indian, no matter in which country the act is performed.

Even paid sex sometimes can have emotions attached orelse why brothers will RTF .. Maybe they find the dish nice and go back to eat .. But a girl is not a dish after all ...

[Alf1977]

We men kept finding excuses for yourselves why we cheat- bored, wives don't give, even wives give also will complain sex becoming boring) but why no one say he cheat because he no longer love his wife if he is married? Some even amuse me when they commented that the wives should close an eye if they found out their husbands cheat ... Pity the wives or gfs of the brothers here, because their men no longer love them!

[Rickey]

Is paid sex consider as cheat?

I would prefer my hubby to get a paid sex which is always a one time thing, they won't coming knocking on your door.... Unlike affair/FBs which will still have higher percentage of marriage breaking down.

Wow !! u r such a nice n considerate wifey, sis Girlonly83 :)...to allow yr hubby to hv paid sex...v. hard to find in SG !.. he shd really appreciate you

Yes its true...paid sex may be only a one time thingy...but the danger remains of contracting HIV/STD when one engages in sex wif multiple partners...the consequences can be very tragic if u r not lucky...he can oso pass the STI to you when u both next hv sex...tis is oso the danger tat befalls many who succumb to the temptation of having sex wif a new partner n not realising tis,.. as they are swept away by the romance, excitement n enjoyment of the moment of having sex tgt ..take care

[Asianguy]

What if we turned this around? What if it's the lady going for paid sex? What would the opinion be? If she had paid sex and no emotional attachments, would that still be cheating? Can bros take it?

Ultimately, I found that I went for sex outside of my marriage because I had issues to deal with my own self. It was not my wife, not my FB, and not the WL's. Even after my divorce, it did not mean I had license to go fuck around without care. The issues are still present. Dealing with myself meant I am able to foster a healthier attitude towards woman and how I connect with them. That does not mean I dont love sex but sex as a transaction is definitely less fulfilling for me nowadays.:)

[<<totally>>]

sis Girlonly83 :)...to allow yr hubby to hv paid sex
Bro, she did not say she allowed, but preferred. Guess she also preferred her hubby not to find at all.:p

So deep. So deep.
Comparing to the depth of a woman heart, that's a speck of dust.


What if we turned this around? What if it's the lady going for paid sex? What would the opinion be? If she had paid sex and no emotional attachments, would that still be cheating? Can bros take it?

For a guy to take it or not, seriously he do not have much say, since things were in such a state now. The choice is simple, either act blind or walk away.


Morale of the long story is .....Guess we are selfish by nature, want to enjoy by ourselves yet don't allow others to enjoy outside.

The morale of the story is Greed. Greed is part of our daily life. The moment when we wish or demand or even think of something that we do not have, greed at that very instance is present. Like what I have said, stay contented to what ones' have. For you might be getting more than you wanted.

have to play with girls to make me feel better.
I feel ashamed to get married in fact,
but my case of a BTO flat.. I don't feel proud if I were to marry one day
Simply a waste of time and money.
And being together is more of a responsibility.
Guess I do not love my gf enough!

just pay $30 to get that bloody marriage certificate or if die die any of our parents need to have a lunch/dinner, I won't pay more than 2k on the whole wedding ..

Atrocity, Fears, Pain, Anger, Grief, Hate, Revenge = 7 evils of Human.

My brother only 1 word to solve your problems. Love.

Love is about giving and never about taking. If you can still love her, despite she did hurt you in anyway and continued to love her. You are on the path of true love. :cool:

桃花坞里桃花庵，桃花庵下桃花仙；桃花仙人种桃树，又摘桃花卖酒钱。酒醒只在花前坐，酒醉换来花下眠；半醒 半醉日复日，花落花开年复年。但愿老死花酒间，不愿鞠躬车马前；车尘马足富者趣，酒盏花枝贫者缘。若将富贵 比贫贱，一在平地一在天；若将贫贱比车马，他得驱驰我得闲。别人笑我忒疯癫，我笑别人看不穿；不见五陵豪杰 墓，无花无酒锄做田。

我可以说的都说了，最终还是你自己，愿不愿意去接受。

[justdifferent]

i think this is a question a lot of people would want the answer to.

if we look closely, the answer is not that far away. people cheat in a relationship because there is something missing and cheating fills that void.

it could be multitude of reasons ranging from difference in levels of sexual drive, a need for feelings of infatuation, lacking of affection, etc.

very often, when men cheat it is due to physical reasons. there is a need for more excitement, and the forbidden fruit is always infinitely exciting. men also tend to be able to easily separate sex and love, which means that men are more likely to have sex with someone for purely physical reasons.

women, on the other hand, usually cheat due to emotional reasons. that is not to say that women do not love getting physical, but rather, the reason they look outside of their relationship for gratification is largely due to the fact that their man isn't making them feel like the most important woman in the world any more.

all of this is just generalization, and there are always exceptions to every case.

[DO_YOU_BJ]

the answer is not that far away. people cheat in a relationship because there is something missing and cheating fills that void
This is the jackpot to all cheating.
Kudos, well said ;)

[Rickey]

One classic example of guys n gals cheating on their respective partners is the current n ongoing high profile case tat hogs the headlines of our major daily newspapers these few days wif the juicy details...one of the reasons mentioned in the press was tat "his wife cannot give him certain things" :(..n so another woman has to step in to fulfil tat need for him instead... sounds so familiar, isn't it ?...sigh

Tis cheating problem will never see any end in the future n will go on frm generation to generation :(...history keeps repeating itself lol...there will be no solution until n unless ALL THE WOMEN & WIVES WAKE UP n realise tis n begin to treat their HBs well wif love n respect n happily help to fulfill their sexual needs or risk another woman stepping in to fulfil tis role for them...or unless of course, the HB is willing to undergo voluntary castration like the eunuchs of the olden days of the chinese empire...leaving him wif no sexual desire thereafter...

[JoeDoe]

Perhaps the disease of onegina is really bad. We have to cure it by having more vagina.

[justdifferent]

Tis cheating problem will never see any end in the future n will go on frm generation to generation :(...history keeps repeating itself lol...there will be no solution until n unless ALL THE WOMEN & WIVES WAKE UP n realise tis n begin to treat their HBs well wif love n respect n happily help to fulfill their sexual needs or risk another woman stepping in to fulfil tis role for them...or unless of course, the HB is willing to undergo voluntary castration like the eunuchs of the olden days of the chinese empire...leaving him wif no sexual desire thereafter...

from a male perspective, you are not being fair.
while i've stated and i firmly believe that 'people cheat because there is something missing and cheating fills that void', an explanation of cause is not a justification by reason.

cheating is always wrong, even if your partner cannot fulfill certain needs of yours. there is always the 'right' option of first separating from your partner, then going out to play.

with that said, most people don't really care, and most of us just want the best of both worlds - going home to a nice family and still having flings with your hot secretary/etc.

[justdifferent]

This is the jackpot to all cheating.
Kudos, well said ;)

thank you, the philosophical me is always intrigued by the intricacies of life. glad to see that others share the same view as i do.

[juanbill]

Haizzz i am so stupid.. married my wife after 4 years of courting.. she is a very good wife.. after one year then suddenly i fall in love with a girl 10 years my junior...cause dont want to lie to wife.. tell her the truth.. divorce with her.. after 6 months break up with new gf.. what a life... now lost everything..

[keewee]

Haizzz i am so stupid.. married my wife after 4 years of courting.. she is a very good wife.. after one year then suddenly i fall in love with a girl 10 years my junior...cause dont want to lie to wife.. tell her the truth.. divorce with her.. after 6 months break up with new gf.. what a life... now lost everything..

haiz... bro wat to do dats life ....
do rem the one whom u love will nv be wife and the one who loves u the most will nv be your lover

[fictionman]

Haizzz i am so stupid.. married my wife after 4 years of courting.. she is a very good wife.. after one year then suddenly i fall in love with a girl 10 years my junior...cause dont want to lie to wife.. tell her the truth.. divorce with her.. after 6 months break up with new gf.. what a life... now lost everything..

That's de problem wz us guys...Try so hard & finally got it but aft awhile bored wz it...Sigh...Feel 4 u bro....Heads up man...

[sean69]

why do we cheat on our partners?? .. why does the chicken cross the road?? .. :D .. but i digress.. so....

i like to think that we do not start a relationship with an intention to cheat on them... often there is a trigger or a breaking point that pushes us to the dark side... it could be stress, it could be revenge, it could be "filling" a void, it could be temptation ... but end of the day it boils down a simple fact that cheat because we are weak.. too weak to say no, too weak to remember our vows or commitment when we started the relationship..

am i a holy man for making this kind of statement??? hell no !!! .. i am a sinner who is still unable to repent despite knowing that i will go to hell for what i did...

why can't i stop? .. i know it is wrong but why can't i stop?? .. pure and simple.. weakness... it is easier to avoid issues, easier to avoid confrontation and much easier than facing the truth...

i can go on and on but it will just be a rambling of a DOM.... so, just my two sperms worth of input .. :D

[<<totally>>]

Haizzz i am so stupid.. married my wife after 4 years of courting.. she is a very good wife.. after one year then suddenly i fall in love with a girl 10 years my junior...cause dont want to lie to wife.. tell her the truth.. divorce with her.. after 6 months break up with new gf.. what a life... now lost everything..

Bro juanbill, I did felt you made a wrong call for the cheats you did. There are two cheats in your case. First cheat is 'dun want to lie to wife'. Second cheat is 'fall in love with a girl 10 years my junior'.

In the first cheat, you would have lied and see how things worked out with that 10yrs old junior. You choose to be the 'righteous' person and be honest to your wife as I do believed that you must have felt things are not going to work out with your wife and the romance with the '10 years junior' is something you wanted to go full speed ahead not knowing you became disillusioned and unaware of the potential problems.

In the second cheat, you should not have any thoughts with the '10 yrs junior' not even to mention a start. You have clearly forgotten that what is your status now. I believed you have decided to reward your with 'a second chance' in life but your wife was not given that chance. Love is a powerful tool as I did mentioned before. The mi usage of it does caused consequences of devastating effects of destructive nature. If your love remained on your wife and try working things out as a second chance, things might have been different to you now.

To tell a lie is simple, to cover a lie is hard. More lies needed and with every additional lies more work and effort. I did not suggest you to lie in the first place. If you wish to choose the first cheat, I rather you do not say and remained quiet about it. As remaining quiet is not saying a lie. We guys need to be clever sometimes.

Life is full of contractions and illusions. So remained contented for the things in life and you will not have to go through all the after effects.:(

[fictionman]

What if we turned this around? What if it's the lady going for paid sex? What would the opinion be? If she had paid sex and no emotional attachments, would that still be cheating? Can bros take it?

Ultimately, I found that I went for sex outside of my marriage because I had issues to deal with my own self. It was not my wife, not my FB, and not the WL's. Even after my divorce, it did not mean I had license to go fuck around without care. The issues are still present. Dealing with myself meant I am able to foster a healthier attitude towards woman and how I connect with them. That does not mean I dont love sex but sex as a transaction is definitely less fulfilling for me nowadays.:)

Think no matter how good our partners are in bed, we will be tempted to eat outside coz as human beings we always wats to try out new stuffs...

If I found out my wife is cheating on me, I admit I wont be able to take it...My ego would be severely bruised...Is my sex skills tt bad until she hv to eat out???...I dont knw if I can ever 4give her...

[biozaogeng]

Sorry but I'm bored tonight so i'm spamming all the threads with replies.

I think we should close this thread cause we all know the answer.

OUR GENETIC PURPOSE IS TO SPREAD OUR SEED, WITH AS MANY PARTNERS AS POSSIBLE TO ENSURE THE HIGHEST PROBABILITY THAT WE WILL HAVE OFFSPRING.

[flamingoest]

I guess it's an innate desire that all men possess.. No matter how young or old you are.

[hello420]

OUR GENETIC PURPOSE IS TO SPREAD OUR SEED, WITH AS MANY PARTNERS AS POSSIBLE TO ENSURE THE HIGHEST PROBABILITY THAT WE WILL HAVE OFFSPRING.

200% correct.
And lets not assume that women are saints either in matters of love!!!

A WOMAN IS GENETICALLY PROGRAMMED TO MATE WITH MOST POWERFUL MALE.
Does not matter that the male treat her like a piece of shit.
True love of other lesser males can go to hell.