Rough sex...or not?

[JustaGal]

Need advice from bros and sis here.

I have been with my boyfriend for about 8 months. Everything goes well(hmm...maybe not) untill now.

I do enjoy our sex life, especially rough sex. Well...it is not really that rough. He does not pull my hair or spank me. He juz penetrate really hard n sometimes tie my hands or something.

I do enjoy it alot if Im in the mood and i feel myself very wet. Both of us will enact rape scene. And Im a person who never hide my joy. I will always tell him during the session that I love him "raping" me. I fantasise myself to be raped occasionally because I believe this kind of imgination will spice up the sex life when both parties feel comfortable.

Then here comes one of our love making sessions. I was sleeping. And I could feel his urge. But I was tired and dry. He tried to help me to get wet by fingering and licking. But I was still dry. He couldnt wait. He rode me then kinda force him into me...I had to say that I dont feel excited at all. Instead I felt painful. I kept telling him "It hurts! It hurts!". But he didnt stop. He continued pushing in and pulling out...Slowly my pussy got wet but not my heart! I kept telling him to be gentle since he was already inside. But he kept pushing hard.

I dont know if he misinterpreted my signal but I did show my refusal: I didnt kiss him; I called out his full name(I only do it when people piss me off);
I didnt cooperate with him by acting like a dead fish(I will never do it during our regular "raping" session). Then he tried to kiss me. I strongly refused of course and said coldly:"I hate you."

He was surprised I guess...then he got up and dressed up. Slam the door and left.

It kinda happened before...but I could bear them since they were not that bad...I tried hard to please him sometimes. But this time is...different. Somehow I cant tell the reason. And I cant defind it. I read one sis's post in SBF talking about the high sex drive of her bf. He always wanted to hav sex with the girl and did 2 times a day. I cant find the post and link it here. But thats more or less what my bf do to me as well....Do you guys force(half foece?) the ladies to hav sex? Any sis here hav the similar experience?

What should I do?

Thanks in advance. :o

Cheers

[henry_ang10]

Need advice from bros and sis here.

I have been with my boyfriend for about 8 months. Everything goes well(hmm...maybe not) untill now.

I do enjoy our sex life, especially rough sex. Well...it is not really that rough. He does not pull my hair or spank me. He juz penetrate really hard n sometimes tie my hands or something.

I do enjoy it alot if Im in the mood and i feel myself very wet. Both of us will enact rape scene. And Im a person who never hide my joy. I will always tell him during the session that I love him "raping" me. I fantasise myself to be raped occasionally because I believe this kind of imgination will spice up the sex life when both parties feel comfortable.

Then here comes one of our love making sessions. I was sleeping. And I could feel his urge. But I was tired and dry. He tried to help me to get wet by fingering and licking. But I was still dry. He couldnt wait. He rode me then kinda force him into me...I had to say that I dont feel excited at all. Instead I felt painful. I kept telling him "It hurts! It hurts!". But he didnt stop. He continued pushing in and pulling out...Slowly my pussy got wet but not my heart! I kept telling him to be gentle since he was already inside. But he kept pushing hard.

I dont know if he misinterpreted my signal but I did show my refusal: I didnt kiss him; I called out his full name(I only do it when people piss me off);
I didnt cooperate with him by acting like a dead fish(I will never do it during our regular "raping" session). Then he tried to kiss me. I strongly refused of course and said coldly:"I hate you."

He was surprised I guess...then he got up and dressed up. Slam the door and left.

It kinda happened before...but I could bear them since they were not that bad...I tried hard to please him sometimes. But this time is...different. Somehow I cant tell the reason. And I cant defind it. I read one sis's post in SBF talking about the high sex drive of her bf. He always wanted to hav sex with the girl and did 2 times a day. I cant find the post and link it here. But thats more or less what my bf do to me as well....Do you guys force(half foece?) the ladies to hav sex? Any sis here hav the similar experience?

What should I do?

Thanks in advance. :o

Cheers

No... a guy should never force himself on the gal. No respect for the gal. So I think he takes you for a sex machine only. Shame on him. He should have stopped when you say it hurts.

[zeus]

Talk it out. Tell him how you feel, like what you are doing here.
You mentioned he just dressed up and left. Perhaps he was 'confused' by your mixed signals. First you told him you like to be "raped", next you are telling him that you hate him.

[Kilograms]

that dis respectful of him. he probably feel not shiok after you refuse his action, that cause him to lose he's pride or something like dat...but he'll get by....next time you initiate sex and see what happens...but be prepare, it'll be even more rougher. :D

[jcum]

Think u guys better have a heart to heart talk....believe a clear communication on when "rape" is the agenda for the night/day be defined and followed...anything else should be normal sensual session !:)

[bastardball]

To be honest, some guys feel more excited and turned on when the gal says "slower" or "pain" or "it hurts"....so that the guy is sadomasochistic, it may make him feel more "man" when he is pumping you roughly...its just a prove of his manhood that his downunder is big enough to cause some form of sensation for you, be it pleasure or pain....I know because my dick is small and when a girl tells me slower or pain pain, I kinda feel more "man" and "turned on".....

That's my own point of view though....:)

[ddog]

Female species sometimes feels like doing it and sometimes don't when the time doesn't feel right, such as too tired, no mood (cycle related), etc. A guy should be matured enough to respect that. If he doesn't, then he's prob not matured enough.

[Lionrod32]

U should tell him when you are in the mood and to signal for him to fully penetrate when you are ready ..... U should have a good chat with your bf so that he knows your true feeling ,.. My two cents

[peanut123]

TS, your bf is a selfish ass who only cares about his own pleasure, even at the expense of your pain. Frankly, if you told him no and he still goes ahead, that's rape. I think its a sign that he does not really care about you. No man will force himself on the girl he loves.

And for him to go storming off after sex without even trying to find out what made you upset speaks volumes abt his attitude.

You need to talk to him about it. If he still does not change, then look for someone better.

[Tomb]

I guess he really misinterpret your initial signals since u mentioned u are into rough sex. He might just think its one of those days when u are play-acting with him.

Talk to him and let him know when its time to be serious and stop and draw the line and when's the time to role-play.

Hope u 2 are better.

[nicole79]

hi sis..

sex must be enjoyable by both parties....he is too selfhish ... :mad:

[mldue]

when you both understand about engaging in role play, especially those edging towards sm or some pain/discomfort involved, do ready a "keyword" to signify stop. should be distinct and not something that can be mistaken.

if all else in the relationship is good, i'm more inclined to suggest you try to sort out what could really just be a misundertanding.

[smoofdeek]

I guess it's an unfortunate case of fantasy and consent being misinterpreted. I think he should have known when to stop when you called out his full name. It's important to establish mutual understanding when it comes to these things, my fb and I have our own "word" when the boundaries are crossed, it sometimes happens. You gotta talk to your bf seriously if you want to continue the relationship. If he still don't understand, he'd make the same mistake again, and again.

[tigerprawn]

Sis, basically it comes down to this: you and your bf dont know each other well enough. Do not mistake sexual intimacy with spiritual bonding like he is your soul mate or something. Obviously, you do not know him well enough that you were surprised and confused why he forced himself on you. And obviously he doesnt know you well enough to know when you are really pissed off and when you are role playing - or maybe he doesnt care enough. Moral of the story: you have to face the reality that this relationship you are in now may not be the bed of roses you imagine or assumed it to be - you think you are in love but seriously...... does he love you enough to feel and bother to know or care when you are really hurting or pissed off. And just getting up, dress and walk out slam the door...... only an asshole would do that after fucking the girl he supposedly loves.

Don't just focus on the sex part how he may misinterpret role playing. You might want to focus more on the bigger picture here - your relationship. This incident discloses a deeper inherent issue in your relationship. Do you seriously want to spend your ever after with this guy? There is no right or wrong answer to this question. Only what kind of guy you really want in your life. And look at the facts (NOT your assumptions) whether he is really this guy or not.

[Firssue]

TS why not try to push him away the next time he does this or slap him? No offense because feel that he is not respecting you at all.. We girls have our rights too! We are not sex machines..

[chixsticks]

It kinda happened before...but I could bear them since they were not that bad...I tried hard to please him sometimes. But this time is...different. Somehow I cant tell the reason. And I cant defind it. I read one sis's post in SBF talking about the high sex drive of her bf. He always wanted to hav sex with the girl and did 2 times a day. I cant find the post and link it here. But thats more or less what my bf do to me as well....

Cheers

Sexual incompatibility is the highway to no-way and separate ways:D
If this carries on over a longer period, think many bros here will agree he's probably comtemplating alternative sex partner, or even alternative sex:eek:

Read it somewhere our man-tool has a shelf life of between 10,000 - 15,000 ejaculations....well, if you think you can outlast that; then perhaps you may find eternal hapiness!

Else, look for someone ....hitting 14,000 on his counter....and Voila! - you'll be closer to finding true love!

Anyway, happy holidays....it's time to hit the books again girl (??)

[handsomeaff]

Need advice from bros and sis here.

I have been with my boyfriend for about 8 months. Everything goes well(hmm...maybe not) untill now.

I do enjoy our sex life, especially rough sex. Well...it is not really that rough. He does not pull my hair or spank me. He juz penetrate really hard n sometimes tie my hands or something.

I do enjoy it alot if Im in the mood and i feel myself very wet. Both of us will enact rape scene. And Im a person who never hide my joy. I will always tell him during the session that I love him "raping" me. I fantasise myself to be raped occasionally because I believe this kind of imgination will spice up the sex life when both parties feel comfortable.

Then here comes one of our love making sessions. I was sleeping. And I could feel his urge. But I was tired and dry. He tried to help me to get wet by fingering and licking. But I was still dry. He couldnt wait. He rode me then kinda force him into me...I had to say that I dont feel excited at all. Instead I felt painful. I kept telling him "It hurts! It hurts!". But he didnt stop. He continued pushing in and pulling out...Slowly my pussy got wet but not my heart! I kept telling him to be gentle since he was already inside. But he kept pushing hard.

I dont know if he misinterpreted my signal but I did show my refusal: I didnt kiss him; I called out his full name(I only do it when people piss me off);
I didnt cooperate with him by acting like a dead fish(I will never do it during our regular "raping" session). Then he tried to kiss me. I strongly refused of course and said coldly:"I hate you."

He was surprised I guess...then he got up and dressed up. Slam the door and left.

It kinda happened before...but I could bear them since they were not that bad...I tried hard to please him sometimes. But this time is...different. Somehow I cant tell the reason. And I cant defind it. I read one sis's post in SBF talking about the high sex drive of her bf. He always wanted to hav sex with the girl and did 2 times a day. I cant find the post and link it here. But thats more or less what my bf do to me as well....Do you guys force(half foece?) the ladies to hav sex? Any sis here hav the similar experience?

What should I do?

Thanks in advance. :o

Cheers


What if he was enacting just another rape scene for you. How do you react when you do ur usual rape scene? Was ur response any different? Was it perciecved it the same by ur bf? What if he thought of making rape scene more wild? Its not about sex drive, but how much u want to push to the limit. Where do u draw a line?
People do go out of control when they start experimenting outdoor sex. they want more and more adventure every next time. its the same with the rape enactment. talk ur heart with him, this is the best way...

[unsung80]

The game of raping or rough sex should be play when both are conscious and arouse. In a decent relationship, neither when the lady/gf is tired or sleeping that should have been penetrated by brute force. Such man is simple no better than a bastard.

[ah rat]

TS, time to change BF :D

[miniboy]

TS, time to change BF :D

i can offer more gentle sex to you
u can press my button to change mode you wanted
soft, normal, rough, brutal, maniac, insane......cartoon 0-0?
:p

LL

[eileen78]

Hi Sis Nicole,

I agree with you.
Sex must be enjoyable by both parties, cannot be only one parties.

[VaeVictus]

You can come up with a "Stop" word? An ex of mine loved/enjoyed rape scenes alot but there are times where either of us are too tired or uninterested. We had "Amen" :p:p as our Stop! word to halt everything.

[hyperact]

i suppose yr bf received a wrong signal.




btw.... 2times a day is not high sex drive enough, my record in 24 hours is 7 times.. lolx

[wondergal]

VaeVictus is right.

A safe word should be used if men and women play rape or have BDSM sex. This is very important.

Women naturally have cyclic mood of interest and disinterest in sex depending on her menstrual cycle. So sometimes a woman is easily aroused and horny but not some other times. It can be helpful if a woman knows this herself, and if she has a partner, that he understands this.

I have encountered men who are aware of women having PMS. Sometimes they ask me about PMS and if I'm having it. I think many women don't like to blamed for "erratic" or unfriendly behaviour due to PMS, and some consider it rude when men ask if they are having PMS.

[John Cena]

TS u should slap him and kick him since he don't respect u during sex. A guy who don't respect gal should not be respected.

[NewMartin]

TS u should slap him and kick him since he don't respect u during sex. A guy who don't respect gal should not be respected.

Yes i agreed with Bro John Cena...i also hate guys who dun respect gers...kick him off the thread man...:)

[Glock]

He continued pushing in and pulling out...Slowly my pussy got wet but not my heart!

your pussy know something your mind dont know

so you are saying you can only have sex when you want to have sex , if he want sex of course he must give way to you ?

typical singapore woman

he never even demand you suck his cock before he fucks you - what are you complaining about?

look at it this way - your hole belong to him to fuck , whenever and wherever he feel like it . if you look at it this way , you will not have this kind of unhappiness in the future . when he want to fuck , you spread your leg wide for him

end of story

if lubrication come slow and is really painful , you keep a tube of KY on beside your bed , easy solution

[Tana]

still, communication is the key in any kind of r/s.

Talk to him, let him know how u think. if no improvement then u find the wrong bf, then find a better one

[unsung80]

typical singapore woman

This is weird, how u know TS is the Singapore woman? :rolleyes:

[edwardthy]

serves u right for being cheap.

[InuYasha]

Well some gals just like rough sex, there is nothing wrong!!!

[timeoftime]

yea some gals do have their fantasy ...
did my ex with her blind folded and hands tied.

after a while later when i release her hands , her hands went wild